Bears and Rams on Monday Night!

It's not every day that you get to watch your favorite team, at 10-2, play on Monday Night Football while wondering who your quarterback is going to be in the second half. But that's what we've got going tonight with the Bears down in St. Louis. I don't think I need to tell anyone that Bears starting QB, Rex Grossman, is under a lot of heat here in Chicago about his poor play. And that might lead to him being yanked if he stinks up the joint. Personally, I don't think that's going to happen - I like the Bears 27-13 tonight. But to really get a feel for it, I thought, hey let's keep a minute-by-minute report. And if this game isn't interesting, then I'm totally buying this tonite... a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader FATHEAD!

7:18pm CST- And we are coming to you LIVE from the parents house here on the near west side of Chicago! While we here at VFLOAB feel a bit uncomfortable outside of the South Side, we'll deal if for no other reason than the 'rents have HDTV. The TV is tuned to the Science Channel and a program on Mongolia, err, Genghis Khan. I actually sort of want to go to Mongolia. HA! They just show a clip from a Mongolian movie on GK which feature him shooting someone with an arrow... and the guy he nailed just sort of went "Ohhh... five... four... three... two... one... fall!" This is getting me pumped for Monday Night Football.

7:22 - No one says Marc Bulgher quite like Rachel Nichols.

7:28 - Who doesn't love JACKED UP! But can someone tell me why the JACKED UPS! stink this year?

7:30 - Obama is doing the MNF opening... I'm speechless. And I know you would never have guessed, but it was lame on top of it. At least he laughed at the end.

7:31 - Jim Belushi does the video opening... I will now light myself on fire.

7:34 - When it comes to sports this year, I think 2006 will go down as the year that Tony Kornheiser lost his mojo. His stuff on MNF is too cute and it's not that funny. What a shame. He has so much TUP (tremendous upside potential) a few months ago... now... he's just well a Tantalizer.

7:41 - And we have kickoff... Hester the Molester takes it to the 28. He's has to be one of the most exciting players in the NFL this year.

7:43 - It's third and a passing down for the Bears and Grossman completes the pass! And a generous spot gets the Bears the first... nice.

7:52- The Bears and Rams exchange punts and my mom asks me if conservatives are on the left. I then explain to her the political spectrum highlighted by me saying that communism is on the far left. "Really? I always thought Communists were conservative."

7:55 - After making a decent pass that Barrian catches, but out of bounce, Grossman scrambles for a first down for a nice 22 yard gain... and then he holds on to the ball, takes the hit, but gets the ball to Jones who takes the screen for 20 yards or so. This is fantastic start for Rex.

7:59 - Robbie Gould misses the field goal and the Bears don't get any points out of a decent drive. Bummer.

8:09 - The Bears just punted the ball even though they have the ball 4th and 6 on the Rams 35 yard line. Why? The good new is they're able to down the punt on the one. I still disagree with the decision. Not much is happening in this game... just punts, a few nice passes from Grossman, and commericals! Lots and lots of commericals!

8:16 - As Theismann praises Bulger, the Rams put together a nice drive. I really really don't like Joe Theismann. And even thought I lived a few blocks from his resturant last year, I never went. And I'm a better person for it.

8:22 - 4th and 1 on the Bears 26, the Rams go for it... and not only to they get the first down, they take the ball to the one. I smell a goal line stand.

8:24 - Bulger to Holt for six... and the Rams then screw up the snap on the extra point. Unfortunately, the NFL hating America, does not allow blocked/botched extra points or two point conversions to go the other way. Does anything have dumber rules than the NFL? Well besides the tax code.

8:28 - After being beat on Holt's touchdown, Devin Hester takes the kickoff to the house after making two nice moves and then just runs faster than everyone else. My Lord is he fast. That's his fifth TD of the year... and btw, Hester might be the best pick of the 2006 Draft. I'm not kidding. Him and Vince Young have to be neck and neck right now... 7-6 Bears.

8:33 - I would just like to point out that Gil Meche is getting paid 11 million bucks a year. That's more than any of the starters on the White Sox. And Gil Meche wouldn't start on the Sox. That's just insane.

8:35 - After starting a little slow, the Rams have put together two nice drives against the Bears D. The Bears seem to miss Nathan Vashuer more than Tommie Harris.

8:38 - Touchdown Rams... the Bears looked like crap. What is going on?

8:41 - Jim Belushi is in the booth... ugh. Has anyone, I mean anyone, taken advantage of his brother's death like Jim Belushi? I'm sure even Cain feels a little drity watching Belushi.

8:46 - "Get him [Belushi] out of there, sigh." - Dad.

8:48 - Grossman hits Berrian on the slant, Belushi pulls a Tom Thayer in the radio booth by cheering him on, and Berrian takes it to the house. 14-13 Bears. Kornhesier tells Belushi that he can't cheer on anyone in the press box... and Theismann, just to make sure that there is no fun in the press box, starts talking about football killing the mood. Can you imagine Theismann in a romantic situation? Actually, that might be sort of funny.

8:58 - Grossman is hit as he's starting to throw and the ball flys across the field... it looks like a fumble and the Rams recover. Crap. And now we go to the booth...

9:01 - As Mom and I debate how to classify a person as drunk (in a bit of an upset, I say when you wake up the next morning and are hungover, you drank to much, thus you were drunk. She fires back with "well if you didn't have anything in your stomach" an interesting counter point). The call is reversed and the Bears keep the ball with under two minutes remaining.

9:07 - In a bizarre two minute drill, the Rams are moving the ball down the field and features the refs keeping the clock running even though Bruce went out of bounce. Then Theismann claims that "Bulger is the most accurate passer in the league" and that the pass Bulger just threw to Bruce "a perfect pass." I might add Bruce did not catch that "perfect pass." I might also add that Theismann apperently only watches Rams games... Tom Brady, Peyton Manning, Carson Palmer, Joe... do those names mean anything to you?

9:11 - Wilkins misses a 47 yard field goal to end the half. Bears lead 14-13 in a pretty entertaining half. And best of all, Grossman looks really good.

Some food for thought during Halftime:
- Freddy Adu is no longer on DC United... he's going to Salt Lake City.
- Bulls are playing the Pacers... (note: Bulls won last night).
- Alexander Ovechkin-Sidney Crosby, Sidney Crosby-Alexander Ovechkin. Easily the most underrated 'rivarly' in sports.
- Amazing but true, John Wayne portrayed Genghis Khan in a movie.
- Cool, there's a band called Breaking Ribs for Tom Thayer. Awesome.

9:27 - And the Bears kickoff to start the second half. (BTW, I rewound and the slowmoded the opening 'MNF' opening to see what was on Joe Perry's guitar... it's just some blonde... not that interesting unfortunately).

9:30 - Watched the Bulls during halftime, and I really enjoy watching that team. Sure it'd be a little more fun watching LeBron or Wade or Ike Howard every night, but as far as watching a team play good defense and at times exciting offensive basketball... well the Bulls more than fit the bill. Just an enjoyable team. And everyone loves enjoyable teams.

9:32 - In case you were wondering, www.itsthemirrors.com is taken by DLP. That kid sort of freaks me out in the Dakota Fanning sort of way in case you were wondering.

9:35 - Gorssman finds Muhammad two plays in a row for two nice gains. You can hear the "Moooooooseee" chants from the crowd. Lot of Bear fans at the game.

9:37 - After those two throws to Muhammad, Thomas Jones runs for 25 yards... and then goes 30 for the touchdown. That was easy. Really easy. The Rams may... be... broken... 21-13 Bears.

9:52 - Nothing happening... and then Andrian Peterson just took a screen pass about 40 yards stiff arming about five Ram defenders in the process. The Bears are lookin' really good. On yeah, and I was checking out this book: Searching for Bobby Orr .

9:54 - Nice throw from Grossman... and a great catch by Muhammad for a Bears touchdown, and this game is just about over. 28-13 Bears with 3 minutes left in the third. Hot.

10:02 - The Rams went three and out and now the Bears are starting to dominate. This game is going to get ugly... the Rams cannot stop the run and they're physically getting beat up on top of it.

10:09 - Touchdown Bears 35-13... I don't think the Rams are trying. And I'm sort of enjoying the booth tonight.

10:18 - It'd be cool if they just fast forwarded the rest of this game... the Bears are going to win. And the booth is going to talk about nothing the rest of the game. I'm going to e-mail people... unless you want me to talk about Pinochet's death.

10:21 - Mark Anderson comes in and sacks Bulger... and closelines him in the process. It was not an intential, but sort of violent, but part of football... this being the NFL, the ref threw a flag for unnecessary roughness. They might as well just put flags on the quarterback at this point.

10:25 - "I can't believe you type that fast! Do you make mistakes?" - Mom.

10:28 - Touchdown Rams... 35-20... 7:35 left in the game. Who cares.

10:31 - And Hester runs ANOTHER kickoff for a touchdown. Unbeliable! The guy is freakishly fast... he makes a subtle move, and then splits two guys twice and runs faster than everyone else for the touchdown. I'm not asking, I'm demanding, a race between Vick and Hester. "Good call on having them kick it deep, Joe. Good call." Kornheiser to Theismann. That was Classssicccccc.

10:38 - Dear ESPN, please fire Joe Theismann as soon as possible. And the Bears are flat out kicking the crap out of the Rams right now. Steamrolled as Kornheiser puts it.

10:42 - Another meaningless touchdown by the Rams, 42-27, Jackson's second. It doesn't mean anything in this game (both the over and the Bears plous 6 look safe). But for fantasy fans everywhere, that was probably a huge touchdown. Oh fantasy football, how you have changed all our lives. (If you care, I some how lost both games this week despite having above average weeks for both my teams... but you don't care).

10:48 - The Bears just got for a penalty for five guys in the backfield... I'm pretty sure the refts just made that up.

10:53 - As Hester almost picks off a tipped Bulger pass, Thesimann drops this on us, "I just get excited when he touches the ball." Okay that's not that funny, but I'm trying.

11:00 - Charles Tillman picks off Bulger for the game's first turnover with only a minute and change let... this game is OVER... and I'm out of here to go watch the Wire. Peace in the Middle East.