Views from Life on a Bench

A Few Thoughts on Donte Stallworth

2009-06-17T12:46:00.006-05:00

Sox Record: 30-34; The Sox have a -27 run differential.

Place in the A.L. Central and Games back: Third place and 4 behind the Tigers.

Where I get on my Soapbox: I know this is a White Sox blog that usually has some random Chicago or US soccer thought at the bottom but... I'm flabbergasted and pissed off at the moment.

Back in March, when Donte Stallworth killed a man while driving drunk, I figured his career was over. He had played his last snap in the NFL and he'd be put in jail for the next ten years or more. It was a sad, preventable event for all parties. I assumed justice would be served and honestly, didn't think that much more about it.

That was until this morning when I read the details of the Stallworth plea agreement. Thirty days in jail (which will only be 24 days), two years of house arrest, and eight years on probation. Thankfully he has a lifetime driver's license suspension (but something tells me this only applies for Florida). The NFL will probably suspend him for somewhere between two and eight games but we won't know for another month or so. The legal matter is over and done with. This is the justice that Stallworth has been given.

I have a few issues here:

-- We live in a society that values dogs lives more than a human life. I've said it before and I'll say it again, Michael Vick fights dogs and gets 18 months in jail plus at least two years away from the NFL. He becomes public enemy #2 in the process. Vick is eventually cut by the Falcons because of his off the field actions and today, teams don't want to sign Vick because of the PR circus it will entail. Meanwhile, Stallworth killed a man while driving drunk, spends a few days in jail, probably miss a few NFL games, and keep his job with the Cleveland Browns. Now, I know there are people out there that say a dog's life is equal to that of a human. And others will say that Vick knowingly fought dogs while Stallworth accidently ran a man over (though if he wasn't drunk, I think it's safe to assume that the tragic 'accident' would not have happened). But me? I think what Stallworth did was much worse than Vick's actions.

Michael Vick isn't a saint, and I'm not going to defend what he did. But isn't there something wrong with our society and culture when Vick is vilified by society and then spends more time in jail for not harming a human being? Shouldn't we reevaluate our mores? Should we also take a long hard look at our laws?

-- Drunk driving laws in America are total crap. Why even have them if you can plea your way down to three weeks in jail for killing another human being? Another way to think about this: if Stallworth had shot Mario Reyes with a gun, he'd be in jail for 30 years or more. Why is killing someone while driving drunk less of a crime?

Because white people drive drunk. A lot, or enough to make the laws what they are. And white people are the majority in America. I don't want to go on an anti-democracy rant out of fear of being labeled anti-American, but drunk driving laws (like crack and cocaine laws) in America show the ugly side of democracy. So for people who say we live in a post-racial society because we elected a black man as President--we don't. Our laws are still unjust and they still favor the majority. This is one of the cons of living in a democracy, there is a lot of inconsistency in our laws. Drunk driving laws being one of the more glaring in America.

-- Donte Stallworth, I'd never ever thought I'd have to say this, but you've been added to my "I'll Never Own You In Fantasy Football List". So welcome to the club which includes Jerramy Stevens, Pacman Jones, Leonard Little, and T.O.

/steps off Soapbox... thanks JT, waits for the Cubs/Sox game to begin.

Cubs, Sox, and Rossi, too!

2009-06-16T12:15:00.009-05:00

Sox Record: 30-34; The Sox have a -27 run differential.

Place in the A.L. Central and Games back: Third place and 4.5 behind the Tigers.

Most annoying person in the Sox organization: Still Josh Fields.

Member of the White Sox I love the most at the moment: Ozzie... because he called Wrigley what it is: a dump. Fans treat Wrigley like a dump. For all the bullshit about how it's a "national landmark" and the "treasure" the truth is that the same fans that say it's the greatest place on Earth also treat the park like shit. If Cub fans actually respected Wrigley would they actually stand for the behavior that takes place there? And that behavior is some sort of combination of drinking, puking, pissing, yelling like a moron, not watching the game, and then crying after they lose... again. And again. And again.

Rhetorical Question of the Day: Okay, Cubs preview. I'm not sure how to break this down other than just to start rambling. I promise to put away my hyperbole fingers and think with my Milton Freeman Rational Cap.

1) Sox fans do not like Cub fans. There are a billion reasons as to why this is... one is that Cub fans are completely and totally insane. They haven't won the World Series in 100 years, yet fans convince themselves EVERY YEAR that they are going to win the World Series. They're delusional, totally delusional. Reality does not exist at Wrigley Field. TheRiot's game winning hit on Sunday? To the casual baseball fan, the park exploded as if the Cubs had just won the N.L. Pennate. Of course all that happened was that the Cubs broke a four game losing streak and managed to get their asses back to .500.

2) Cub fans don't really care about Sox fans... but then the Sox won the World Series in 2005 and now half of the Cub fans that exist sort of hate and resent us. They'll claim they were happy for us, and I'm sure that was true, but now it sort of grates at them. The other half, the other half that doesn't hate Sox fans? These people are NOT Cub fans. They're MidwestCollegeTransplants (MCT). MCTs went to a Big Ten, a MAC, or Ohio Valley School. They grew up in places like Columbus, Grosse Pointe, Edwardsville, or Middle'O'Nowhere, Iowa. They probably grew up either as casual Red, Indian, Tiger, Brave or Brewer fans. They have since switched allegiance and go to Wrigley to get drunk, puke, yell like a moron, not watch the game, and then cry when the Cubs lose again... and again... and again.

3) The most underrated Cub fan is the 73 year old grandma who goes to the local tavern and drinks High Life while watching the Cubs. These ladies freak me out if only because they don't act like nice little old ladies and can lose all rationality while watching the Cubs. Plus seeing a 71 year old, white haired lady, drinking a High Life at the bar is weird.

4) Remember, newspapers usually don't do statistics well.

5) Both teams come into this series in a state of confusion. The Sox are probably a tad worse than people thought, but I can't call them underachievers. Meanwhile, the Cubs have sucked the first 60 odd games of the year. Their offense has let them down, and the bullpen is a problem again. Their starting pitching has been their saving grace, however, they still lack a #1 pitcher or someone who can go out there and battle no matter what. The closest the Cubs come to that 'ace' is Ted Lilly -- but people are still pissed about Lilly's suck ass performance in the 2007 playoffs. Meanwhile, Zambrano continues to be totally, utterly insane and teams can still rattle him and get inside his head. Rich Harden has been a bust imo and further proof that you cannot trust any Canadian that does not play hockey full time. Between injuries and walking everyone in sight, I'm not sure he actually helps the Cubs since he can't seem to get past the fifth most starts. Ryan Dempster is also a Canadian and also proof that you cannot trust Canadians who do not play hockey as a profession.

6) Speaking of Dempster, he started the now infamous Game One of the 2008 NLDS which does not get enough media attention. The Cubs, who were the best National League team in the regular season, and their fans were pumped for this game. If you remember, Dempster was walking everyone in site.

7) If you want my opinion on why the Cubs are struggling and will not win this year here it is:

Soriano leading off takes their best bat away from the middle of the line up. If Soriano hit fourth, the Cubs line up would be pretty sick and much more difficult to pitch to. But Soriano's instance to lead off hurts this team... instead of going Lee, Soriano, Bradley (and eventually Ramirez) the Cubs stick Fukudome in the three hole. And we all know the Fukudome may be the most hated Cub in some time. The Cubs need Soriano's power down in the order, I think that's the easiest and best way to fix the Cubs. They can't unsign Bradley (who they should NEVER have signed in the first place), and unless they can deal for Chase Utley, there's little chance they they can find an upgrade at any position on the trade market. Moving Soriano is really the only option they have in 2009. Not that I want them to win... but it would be fun to watch them lose to the Phillies or Dodgers in the playoffs.

8) The Cubs haven't won a World Series since 1908. They haven't played in the World Series since 1945. Wrigley was built in 1912.

9) Prediction? I'll say the Sox take two of three. The pitching match ups probably slightly favor the Cubs, but the Cubs pen figures to blow one of the games.

The Most Hated American in America: George W. Bush gets the day off because... Giuseppe Rossi appeared! Under normal circumstances scoring two goals to lead Italy to a 3-1 victory of the U!S!A! in soccer would lead Rossi to be disliked by a the 100,000 soccer fans in the US. But Rossi was born and raised in... New Jersey and thus is an American citizen (I wonder if Rossi voted in 2008?). However, Rossi decided to play for Italy internationally because, well, he's good enough, probably would like to win a trophy that isn't the Gold Cup, and his father is Italian (which gives him Italian citizenship). Rossi spent the first 13 years here in the USA and probably orders heroes from the place catty corner from wooder plant while listening to Bon Jovi. I'm sure he fits in with these guys...

I didn't see the game. It sounded like the US got a bogus red card, went up 1-0, then got taken apart in the second half. Now they have their work cut out for them to advance to the next round of the Confederations Cup.

As for Rossi... until he starts doing American Apparel ads, I can't hate on the kid. Sure it'd be nice if he'd play for the country he was born in and lived in, but it's within his right to play for Italy. You win some (Freddy Adu) and you lose some (Rossi and the Serbian kid, Neven Subotic). However, with the US dying for an American born soccer star... wouldn't it be in some young kids interest to play for the USA? Seeing how much press Adu got when he was a teenager and how much money Beckham got, wouldn't being the first American soccer star be a lot of money in the bank? Rossi won't be endorsing anything here in the U.S.A. because he decided to play for Italy. But with his talent... wouldn't he have a ton of offers if he did play for the USA? Or is this wishful thinking on my part?

Is there hope?

2009-06-15T12:14:00.003-05:00

Sox Record: 30-34; The Sox have a -27 run differential.

Place in the A.L. Central and Games back: Third place and 4.5 behind the Tigers.

Most annoying person in the Sox organization: Still Josh Fields.

Member of the White Sox I love the most at the moment: You hit a home and keep the Sox in the game on the mound, you become my favorite player for the moment. Come on down, Mark Buehrle! Yesterday's game was crazy... featuring a pitcher who scored the winning run as a pitch runner.

Rhetorical Question of the Day: Okay, I was way off. Konerko won't be out for a while. Missing only Friday's game, Konerko was back in the line up on Saturday and also played Sunday. The Sox had one big inning on Saturday and a great pitching performance from Contreras leading to an easy win. Then yesterday enough went right for them to pull out a win. Add a bad weekend for the Tigers and the Sox are all of a sudden 4.5 out with 98 to play. So... do the Sox have a chance?

Let's do some easy math. Last year, the Sox won the AL Central with 89 wins. In order for the Sox to win 89 games this year... well they have to go 59-39 (.602). And seeing how this team has played thus far I don't think that's going to happen. The run differential alone says that this team isn't going to get it done unless the offense finds another run a game. And in order for that to happen St. Carlos has to get healthy, Pods has to keep it up, Beckham has to keep hitting like he hit this weekend, and probably get someone else (Anderson? Nix? Getz? Fields?) to start hitting much better than they are. I'm not holding my breath.

HOWEVER, the Tigers are on pace to win 87 games and that means the Sox only need to go 57-41 (.582). Oh wait, that would still require the Sox offense to turn things around and Carlos... Pods... Beckham... Someone else...

In other words, one weekend set against the Brewers isn't changing my opinion about the Sox. I still think they're an 80 win team.

But it's also nice to take two or three from the Brewers--former rials turned now sort of Great Hopes for Sox fans who want the Cubs to lose. I'm not sure what to make of the Brewers now a days. They've been out of the American League for over ten years now and in that time my dislike of them has abated. But I still find it hard for me to root for them... let's go Reds... maybe one of these days I'll be able to get behind the team that represents the fine people of Wisconsin.

Tomorrow... Cubs preview.

The Writing is on the Wall

2009-06-12T14:56:00.002-05:00

Sox Record: 28-33; The Sox have a -29 run differential.

Place in the A.L. Central and Games back: Third place and 5.5 behind the Tigers.

Most annoying person in the Sox organization: I am openly rooting for Josh Fields to strike out every time he steps to the plate. I'm not sure I've ever rooted against a Sox player like I've started rooting against Fields. I want him to fail... which is really weird considering he's going to be playing first base a lot over the next month with Konerko hurt.

Member of the White Sox I love the most at the moment: Pods. Seriously, I can't get enough of Pods right now. I said it and it feels good. I have no clue where he came from or why he's good, but he is and I love it. I love it like a high school crush or a spring song.

Rhetorical Question of the Day: The Sox went the inverse of what they needed to do on their longest home stand of the season (4-8) and in the process loss St. Carlos of Quinten and Konerko for the next month. They weren't scoring runs before and they'll probably be scoring less in the next month. So what to do?

If nothing else, for the first time since early May, I'm sort of excited about the Sox again. Weird, but true... so why am I pumped about a Sox team that's going to lose more than it wins from here on out?

Because it's the Sox are going to reload. The 2005 team will be a distant memory by April of 2010. Dye and Thome should start telling Kenny where they want to play the last two or three months of the season. Bobby Jenks could easy be dealt assuming he stops blowing saves. Dotel is all but gone at this point. If Jose Contreras has a few more good starts, I could see a team taking a flyer on him come July.

The only two guys I can't see the Sox trading are Konerko and AJ. AJ stays because they don't have anyone else who can catch four or five times a week this year or next year. Plus AJ's the kind of guy who's more valuable to the Sox than he is to any other team. Konerko isn't going any where because he's a 5 and 10 guy (meaning he has to okay any deal) and the Sox can't take the PR hit of trading away a fan favorite.

Shockingly, even if the Sox unload all those guys... they should be in good shape in 2010. Beckham will move over to second at some point (I pray). Hopefully, Cuban#3 (Dayan Viciedo) can take over third next year. Alexei stays at short and Konerko at first. And with so much money coming off the books, the Sox can make a run at an outfielder (Holiday? Jason Bay? Carl Crawford if he some how hits the open market? Chone Figgens?) to replace Dye next year. And the starting pitching is pretty much in place (they'll need to find a fifth, but that shouldn't be too hard to fill). Plus who knows what the Sox will pick up from the Thome/Dye/Dotel/Jenks?/Contreras? deals.

Of all the guys the Sox have to deal, Dye probably has the most value since he's a hell of a player and can hit. He makes too much sense for the Red Sox or the Mets. And if you're the Rays, don't you take a look at Thome? Same goes for the Angels and Rangers.

It will be interesting to see how this plays out... I'm sure I'll have more thoughts as time goes on...

When Shitty Baseball Players Cry: The Josh Fields Story

2009-06-10T12:58:00.000-05:00

Sox Record: 27-32; The Sox have a -29 run differential.

Place in the A.L. Central and Games back: Third place and 5.5 behind the Tigers.

Most annoying person in the Sox organization: Josh Fields, who sucks but is upset that the White Sox brought up Beckham to replace him at third. Some advise for Josh Fields: if you could hit and field and this wouldn't be a problem. But Fields has been absolutely atrocious. The best you can say about his play this year is that he's been sort of getting on base. But everything else has been fat bellow major league quality. He hasn't hit for power or average and he can't field at third base. His error on Monday ended up costing the Sox the game [more on that in a second]. That Fields went public with the Sox calling up Beckham only means one thing... I can't wait until they cut/trade/sent him down to the minors again. If Josh Fields never plays for the White Sox again I'd be happy.

Member of the White Sox I love the most at the moment: Jared Mitchell! The Sox first round pick yesterday is an outfielder with LSU who the scouts say has a ton of 'raw' 'talent'. Apparently fast and eventually will have some pop and should be able to play center in the majors. However, since Mitchell played football at LSU also (back up wide out) he isn't as far along as most college players. If Mitchell pans out, I wouldn't expect him to reach the Sox until 2012 because he has such a long way to go.

Also big ups to the White Sox's next Great Jewish Hope: Aaron Poreda who was called up yesterday. The world found out via his Facebook status... is this the first time somebody's Facebook status made news? I know Twitter has already done so... but Facebook?

Rhetorical Question of the Day: I sad the Sox had to go 8-4 over this home stand. Right now they're 3-7. This home stand has been a disaster. And to top it off, they should have taken the first three games from the Tigers in this all important five game set. But of course, they blew the first game and lost a heart breaker last night. On Monday, in the first part of a double header, the Sox come back to tie the game only to lose it thanks to Josh Fields inability to play baseball. Last night, they score three in the ninth only to lose in part because:

1) In the bottom of the ninth, down 2, Konerko doubles down the left field line. Pods and Alexei score with ease. Wise, who was on first, is thrown out at the plate by a hair... if he was out at all. Just an absolute killer to not win the game there.

2) To lead off the 10th, Cabrera hit a solo shot off Linebrink to give the Tigers a 7-6 lead. Sox can't do anything in the 10th... game over. As South Side Sox put it, bad teams find ways to lose to okay teams.

I don't know where the Sox go from here. Even if they win today and tomorrow they stand 3.5 out and three under .500. The Sox run differential isn't very good. Even with Pods and Alexei sort of saving the season over the last three weeks, the pitching hasn't been enough and the bottom of the order blows. I don't know where the Sox go from here in 2009.

They get a steady diet of the National League over the next few weeks. This is a good thing. But the Tigers, Twins, and Indians also get to face the NL over the next few weeks. Odds are the Sox, who also have the tougher of the interleague schedules due to the Money Making Series also known as playing the Cubs twice, won't pick up that much (if any) ground. So July comes around and the Sox are within striking distance, but probably have a negative/barely positive run differential and are floating around .500. So sure, they could lie to themselves and hope that this old Tiger team who is getting some career years out of guys to flounder. And then hope the Twins don't make any moves and the Tribes pitching continues to suck... But that's hopelessly hoping.

I'm about ready to bail on 2009... but hey if Pods can turn into a borderline All-Star, then why can't Gordon Beckham start hitting, AJ starts driving in runs, and the Sox find a second baseman?

GORDON BECKHAM!

2009-06-04T09:49:00.002-05:00

Sox Record: 25-27; The Sox have a -17 run differential.

Place in the A.L. Central and Games back: Third place and 3.5 behind the Tigers.

Most annoying person in the Sox organization: The White Sox cannot hit pitchers the first time they see them. They turn bad AAA prospects into Randy Johnson. So after back to back games against a pitcher they've never seen and who isn't very good... and the Sox losing both games... I hate the entire lineup. Well not Dye, because he hits these guys, but everyone else.

Member of the White Sox I love the most at the moment: GORDON BECKHAM!!!! He has arrived! He's in Chicago! He's going to start this afternoon! He might be one of the three or four things in this AL Central race that may tip it. If Beckham hits, the Sox line up is vastly improved. If he doesn't... well he isn't not going to hit, so why even think that way.

Beckham is the best prospect since... geeze... I don't know. Carlos Lee 11 years ago? Jon Rauch even though he sucked, was up there in the early part of the decade same can be said for Kip Wells. Joe Borchard was given a ton of press way back when... but he never did enough in the minors to make me think, 'I can't wait until Borchard gets to the bigs'. He just didn't have it.

Beckham is different. He's been an ace in the whole since the team broke camp back in March. He's been the guy who every Sox fan had in the back of their mind -- well if Getz doesn't work out at second, Beckham will be up in July to solve second base. (Of course, Beckham is up in June to solve third base). Beckham's been that guy that the Twins and Indians always have -- the mid year hot prospect that can come up and tip the division. And this year, the White Sox have that guy.

Second and third were always going to be THE positions that determined the Sox season this year. Getz has been good enough to not get upset about his lack of production. Fields has been a total disaster. He can't field and he can't hit. I'm not sure what happened to 2007 Josh Fields, but he's not in Chicago right now. The guy can't hit a 90 mhp fast ball [enter David Ortiz joke here]. In other words, I'm not disappointed to see Fields lose playing time.

Let the Gordon Beckham Era begin.

Rhetorical Question of the Day: Coming into this 12 game home stand, I figured the Sox needed to go 8-4. After a 1-2 start things just got a lot tougher, but a win today means a split with the A's, which isn't the end of the world. Two of three from the Tribe, then the suddenly kind of big five game set with the Tigers. We'll see how the weekend plays out and where the Sox and Tigers are come Monday morning, but until then, let's go out and win the game today and hopefully Beckham will hit a home run today.

Here Come the Sox!

2009-06-01T11:27:00.001-05:00

Sox Record: 24-25; The Sox have a -14 run differential.

Place in the A.L. Central and Games back: Some how the Sox are in second and four games back of the Tigers.

Most annoying person in the Sox organization: The Sox are playing well, so it's hard to be that annoyed with anyone other than National League pitchers who refuse to pitch for the White Sox for reasons I can't figure out. The Sox are a good team, good/great organization, they win games, they win World Series, it's a good market in a great town... if it's for family reasons, then I can't say these guys are making mistakes, but if it's to protect their stats... well fuck 'em.

Member of the White Sox I love the most at the moment: Pods, who apparently thinks it's the first half of 2005... he's getting on base and scoring runs. And it's lead to the Sox playing really really really well. Seriously, this is the most amazing come back in my White Sox lifetime. Even if it only lasts a few more weeks, he's been just what the doctor ordered, and then some, for the White Sox. I can't believe I'm typing this. At no point in March or April did I ever think I would be writing about Scott Podsednik playing well and being just want the Sox needed. If for no other reason than HE WASN'T EVEN ON THE TEAM.

Rhetorical Question of the Day: Sunday's game, which I was looking forward to because of the Danks/Greinke pitching match up, turned out not to be much of a pitching match up. Danks struggled and didn't really have it. However, he fought and battled and if it wasn't for Alexei totally misplaying a pop up behind second, things wouldn't have been as bad. But after Alexei's drop/miss, the Sox were down 4-1 to the Royals and the best pitcher in the majors during the first two months of the season. But the Sox battled, Josh Fields! got a huge two out, two strike single to make it 4-3 in the 3rd. Then Pods reached and scored on a Dye blooper. Tie game 4-4 going to the bottom of the 4th. And better yet, Greinke had thrown 90 odd pitches though the first four innings. Of course the Sox then managed to see all of 12 pitches in the next three innings.

I'm not sure what happened to this team a few weeks ago, but something happened. They're no longer lifeless. It's helped that Alexei has been much better than he was the first six weeks of the season. And Konerko/Dye/Thome has gotten the job done as St. Carlos of Quentin struggles with a foot injury. But it's been, again I can't believe I'm typing this, Scott Podsednik's ability to get on base at the top of the order that's been a huge difference. It's impossible to win with out good pitching. It's hard to win with out a middle of the order OR a good lead off guy. Now, I know that Pods can't keep this up, but this is just amazing. Four years after Pods gets on, Iguchi takes a few pitches as Pods seals second, then Iguchi gets him to third and Konerko/Dye find a way to get Pods home for a 1-0 Sox lead... it's happening all over again! Now if we can figure out second/third (I assume Gordon Beckham will take over one of those positions in July), this team has a shot. Because we all know Kenny is going to land some more pitching by July 31st...

In Other News: The lady survived the Titanic, lived for 97 years, and still never saw the Cubs win the World Series. RIP Millvina Dean.

Thoughts on the most bizarre between innings promo ever:

Blackhawks - I never rapped up the Hawks season. And what can I say. The Red Wings are really good. They were better than the Hawks, end of story.

That said, what a great year for the Hawks. I loved this team and it was the most fun I had watching a team since the 2005 White Sox. So kudos to the Blackhawks... I can't wait until October.

The AL East

2009-05-26T15:57:00.003-05:00

Sox Record: 20-24; The Sox have a -28 run differential.

Place in the A.L. Central and Games back: Fourth and 5 and a half out.

Most annoying person in the Sox organization: Bobby Jenks. The only reason why the Sox aren't 21-23 and on a 6 out of 7 run.

Member of the White Sox I love the most at the moment: Pods, who had like four hits (maybe three) yesterday proving that he doesn't always suck.

Rhetorical Question of the Day: Since we're past Memorial Day, it's time to look at the standings and figuring out who's real and who isn't. Today the AL East:

Boston is in first, but I'm not sure how they score runs. Then again, it's only Ortiz that has been bad. But you have to wonder if they can keep this up. I'm not a fan of their line up and it seems to me that they're hitting out of their minds. They need to get more from Ortiz (duh), and just about everyone else on that team to not drop off all that much. I don't see anyone in this line up, other than Ortiz, that Boston can expect to be better. Jason Bay may be having a career year, but odds are he's going to come back to Earth. All this means the pitching has to continue to be good. And the bad news... the bullpen has been amazing (best in the majors so far). The starting pitching? Not so hot. While they can expect Beckett to pitch better, and Dice-K should be better too, the starting pitching should worry every Red Sox fan. Overall this team is playing a bit over it's head; and in a division with little to no room for error, I don't think they're going to be in first or second in September unless other teams get really banged up. Unless of course, you believe that the bullpen will continue to be amazing and the starting pitching rights itself... I don't.

The Yankees have been hotter than LeBron over the last few weeks. While the numbers say they're playing over their heads, I think we have to remember that A-Rod missed all of April. And he's hitting the shit out of the ball and there is no reason he won't continue to do so. While they have a few bats that are going to cool off (Damon and Posada), it's actually sort of amazing that if the Yankees do make the playoffs by a game or two, they'll have Nick Swisher to thank because of his out of this world April. There is still a lot of dead weight in this line up, but with A-Rod and Tex; then Jeter playing like we all know (and are supposed to love), with Nady coming back and the rest of those guys they should continue to score runs. As for the pitching, it is what it is. Burnett should pitch a bit better if he stays healthy. But everyone else is what you'd expect. Which doesn't bode that well considering their team ERA is way too high, but the bullpen should be better as the season goes on. The starters are the only reason to be worried because there doesn't seem to be a ton of room for improvement, and I still can't believe they didn't trade for Santana. Phil Hughes just isn't that good. Anyway, none of this matters as long as Tex, CC, A-Rod, and Jeter all avoid the DL. If they all do, then playoffs comes back to the Bronx.

The Blue Jays have been in first most of the year thus far, but now stand 1.5 back. Number wise, their success isn't that surprising (as a team). But they've got some totally bizarre individual performances. Overbay and Scutaro are hitting way above their heads. But Rios and Wells are well bellow what anyone would expect. For the Jays sake, maybe Overbay and Scuraro's fall to the mean will be cancelled out by Rios and Wells finally starting to realize they're Rios and Wells. I'd also like to introduce Canada to Adam Lind who will probably keep this up. The key to their season might be Aaron Hill keeping up his All-Star numbers. But that's not likely. The bad news is that it looks like the bats are starting to cool off since a four game sweep of the White Sox. The other part of the bad news for Toronto? There is almost no way they're going to continue to get the pitching they've gotten. Okay, so DocHalladay has been great and will continue to be so (he's on his way to another Cy Young). But injuries have destroyed this rotation, but some how, some way, with a bunch of no names, they've been good enough to win games. That will end soon. But they also hope to get some guys back who have been injured, so who knows. But unless either Hill or Scutaro keep hitting like he has and Wells and Rios turn it up, I can't see them finishing in the top two in this division.

I'm sure statheads are banging their heads against the wall trying to figure out how the Rays are a game under .500. They should be about four games better than they are, but at only five games back, they're in this race. Can Longoria keep this up? There is no reason why he shouldn't, but he hasn't done it yet. However, Jason Bartlett won't keep hitting like he has, and his fall back down to Earth isn't going to be pretty. Zobrist, who's going to get a lot of playing time now that Iwamura is out for the year, should regress a bit, but no reason to think that he's going to hit a lot worse than he has. So the good news is that everyone else: Pena and Gross should be fine, while Crawford, Burrell, and my man crush, B.J. Upton, should only be better. While Crawford is never going to hit for power, I'd expect him to hit better, Burrell only has one season where he was this bad, so while that might be a reason for concern, he's also hitting in a loaded line up so he's going to see good pitches. Finally, B.J. Upton who really can't be any worse, so eventually he's going to figure this out and play like he did in October where he was the best player in baseball. What's really scary is that their pitching is only going to get better (well, starting pitching). Price replacing Sonnanstine should have happened back in March (or will happen when Kazmir, who's been brutal, comes back from the DL). Assuming Kazmir puts it back together, there's little concern reason for concern on this team... well other than losing Iwamura for the year (eh, he can be replaced and just means that Zobrist and Gross will play every day). So if the bullpen can keep it up or even get better, the Rays SHOULD make a run and that run should help them leap frog the Red Sox. I expect them to join the Yankees in the postseason.

Finally, the hapless, but fun, Baltimore Orioles. They don't have any pitching, but they do have a sweet outfield that's going to be really good for years to come. They need to fight another corner outfielder because Felix Pie isn't going to be a major league player, but Adam Jones is. I also don't know what they do with that infield in years to come, but I think the O's have a loaded minor league system so that should sort itself out in the next two years. Seriously, they don't have any pitching... they'll end up having the highest ERA in baseball and have an outside chance at giving up 1,000 runs this year which is always fun to follow. But the pieces are starting to fall into place for the good people of West Baltimore.

Thoughts on the most bizarre between innings promo ever:

Blackhawks - The Hawks looked and played like crap on Sunday. Now they have to win three in a row against the Anti-Fun Machine known as the Detroit Red Wings. It could happen. But it won't. Until their dead, I'll hang on to hope. But all I really want now is Tomas Holmstrom's no talent face being rubbed into the ice. At least the other funless, Nordic no fun machine Wings are talented so you tip your had to them. But Holmstrom? He doesn't do anything. He sits in front of the fucking net and does nothing at all. Of course you can't push him over because that'd be a penalty. So he just sits there and does nothing but block the goaltender. That's not hockey. That's bullshit.

Jane says no; Sox lose by a billion to Twins

2009-05-22T10:35:00.005-05:00

Sox Record: 17-23; The Sox have a -193,392,847 run differential. I think the Twins scored again. My Lord that was embarrassing.

Place in the A.L. Central and Games back: Fourth and 6 and a half out. The Tigers can't lose! GM is going bankrupt! The Wings are two wins from the Cup Finals! Most American cars are made in Canada! I love Detroit!

Most annoying person in the Sox organization: Wilson Betemit who apparently can't throw and whose error in the second lead to about 800 unearned runs.

Member of the White Sox I love the most at the moment: When you lose 20-1, no one gets love. But Kenny Williams for pulling off the Peavy deal gets props.

Rhetorical Question of the Day: Jane Peavy said no to the White Sox yesterday... which shouldn't shock us. Peavy's reasons were something about him wanting to hit, the fact that he wants to keep his ERA low because he plays in the biggest stadium in the majors, and because he's scared of the American League which, as we'll see over the next month, is a lot better than the National League.

Jane, I wish you the best of luck as you attempt to lose even more games on a very bad Padres team that can't hit. I wish you the best of luck if/when you get traded to the Cubs and you approve that deal, which will send everyone into a tizzy, sports journalists will say things like "There's no difference between the Cubs and White Sox! Why did he say okay now! What a loser!" and "If he wanted to win, why did he okay a trade the Cubs who haven't won a World Series in over a hundred years? Plus the weather is better in San Diego!"

But the real story will be "Will Jake Peavy be attacked by Sox fans" if he's traded to the Cubs. Do not, I repeat, DO NOT put this past us. Personally, I would never because if Peavy does get traded to the Cubs he'll blow out his arm or something within a year. BUT there are plenty of Sox fans who are totally nuts on a the Radiers/Jets/Browns/SEC/Ohio State scale. I mean, I could easy see a Sox fan seeing Peavy walking down the street and punching him in the face. Sox fans will go to Wrigley just to boo Peavy. I could see a Sox fan rushing the field with a nine iron and going for Jane's right shoulder. None of this would shock me. In other words, Jake Peavy better hope is NOT traded to the Cubs.

Crazy Stat I Dug Up: Interleague play couldn't come soon enough for the Sox after the last two weeks and yesterday's beat down. The Sox have been great in interleague three of the last four years and the suck ass Pirates come into town for three. But get this about the Pirates. We all know they haven't had a winning season since 1992... Over those 16 seasons the Pirates are 1104-1419. That's a .437 winning percentage. That's 315 games bellow .500. But get this... the Pirate franchise is still over 200 games over .500! So the Pirates can pretty much continue to suck for the next 13 years and they'd still be a .500 franchise.

Thoughts on the most bizarre between innings promo ever:

Blackhawks - Let's beat the Nortic Commies tonight! Come on team Canada plus Kane, Big Buff, Marty, and Khabi! Beat the Commie Nortic bastards!

Jake Peavy a Sox?

2009-05-21T14:16:00.004-05:00

Sox Record: 17-22; The Sox have a -28 run differential.

Place in the A.L. Central and Games back: Fourth and 5 and a half out. The Tigers have caught a bit of fire... I'll take a look at them in a few days. I'm just happy the Royals are doing what I told you they'd be doing. Losing. But it's amazing what a two game winning streak can do.

Most annoying person in the Sox organization: Gavin Floyd -- he has sucked even if he's tipping his pitches.

Member of the White Sox I love the most at the moment: Paul Konerko who seems somewhat dead set to save this season. Konerko, Dye, and Buehrle are the only bright spots this year and the only reason why the Sox aren't in fifth. I've also got love for Brian Anderson because that means Brent "I'm not a Major League Player" Lillibridge isn't in the majors at the moment.

Rhetorical Question of the Day: So the big news is that the Sox have reached a deal for Jake Peavy. The deal is done so all that we're waiting for is Peavy to give it the okay. Since Gordon Beckham isn't part of this deal, I really really really really really want Peavy to say yes. I want Jake Peavy to be a White Sox for the next three or four years. However, until it happens, I'm going to hold off on the baseball stuff... [that said assuming Peavy says yes today I expect Peavy to start on Saturday against Pittsburgh. Jake is schedule to start on Friday for the Padres and Richard is schedule to go for the Sox on Saturday].

All this said... there are two reasons I want Peavy to say yes:

1) Because it makes the White Sox better in the short and long term. He's only 27 and has been pretty durable.

2) It would be the most awesome fuck you to Cub fans since those glorious days in October of 2005 (also known as the Month Jesus Came Back To Chicago).

Cub fans have been going around for months as if they are entitled to Jake Peavy even though their farm system is worse than the Nationals. To most Cub fans, the thinking was that it was only a matter of time before the Padres gave in and traded Peavy to the Cubs for nothing. Peavy would be wearing Loser Blue, it was going to happen. It was fact in their minds.

But here comes Kenny Williams getting a deal done for Peavy right under the Cubs nose. It's glorious. If Peavy accepts, he becomes a hero to Sox fans for this reason alone. If he turns down the Sox and ends up with the Cubs, he will then have to fear for the health of his right shoulder. Us Sox fans are crazy bunch. Disliking or hating the Cubs is a necessity... Jake should consider that... would he rather pitch for the White Sox and be loved on the South Side because he IS NOT a Cub or would he rather fear for the safety of his right elbow every day he lives in Chicago? Because if he does ever make it up to the North Side, there will be a lot of Sox fans in Daniel Plainview clothing.

Thoughts on the most bizarre between innings promo ever:

Blackhawks - Down 2-0 after losing an absolute heartbreaker on Tuesday night. The Hawks played with and maybe even better than the Wings, but a mistake by Campbell in OT lead to a 3 on 1 Nordic rush... Barker and Khabibulin had no shot at stopping the break. Great passing from the Wings, and everyone heads back to Chicago tomorrow with the Hawks down 2-0.

Is it over? No. But it doesn't look good. The good news is that the Hawks didn't play over their heads on Monday. They can easily come out there tomorrow and play better. The Wings don't have this series rapped up just yet. Let's hope the Hawks come out flying with the energy from the crowd which is going to be loud. Really loud.

But the Wings are also like the older, bigger, faster older brother... the Hawks always get close, but the Wings all end up winning. It's so frustrating. It makes me hate sports. But if we were to beat the Wings... it would feel so good... and that's why I keep coming back for more.

And two game winning streaks.

Old Time Hockey

2009-05-16T14:02:00.002-05:00

Sox Record: 15-19; The Sox have a -27 run differential.

Place in the A.L. Central and Games back: Fourth and three games out. This season is fading
fast.

Most annoying person in the Sox organization: All the bums.

Member of the White Sox I love the most at the moment: No one. Let's just get to the Hawks...

Rhetorical Question of the Day: I'm at a Marriott in Trumbull, CT at the moment. The Business Center is next to a 'Starbucks' that isn't a Starbucks, they just have Starbucks coffee. People are NOT happy about this. They want their 5 dollar drinks and they want them now.

Thoughts on the most bizarre between innings promo ever:
Blackhawks - So the Hawks face off against the Red Wings starting tomorrow. There's been a lot written about it. Some of it good. Some of it long and trying just a little too hard. Some of it just stupid. And I'm not going to add anything from the hockey side of things... so go check out those sites if you want a break down of Hawks/Wings (hey look, Canadians are still writting about the NHL!!)

Nicklas Lidstrom is old. He's 39. And he's still better than every Blue Liner in the game. If he played baseball, we'd all just assume that he 'roided up. Just sayin'.

But moving on... this is Chicago/Detroit. This is the city rivalry that I know as a child of the late 80s and 90s. The Bears/Lions have never produced. I can't think of one memorable Lions/Bears game in my life time. Sure there were some fun ones, but none of them really mattered. It has to be one of the most disappointing, long time, division rivalries.

However, who can forget Bulls/Pistons? Then as the Pistons bowed out, Blackhawks/Wings had a few years of heartbreak (for Hawk fans) until the late 90s when the Hawks began to suck like only the Pittsburgh Pirates could ever manage. And as a Sox fan, the Tigers get little love from me.

So with that in mind... my five most hated Detroit players ever:
5) Vladimir Konstantinov - Thankfully, he lived after his horrible accident in 1997. Prior to that, he probably would have cracked the top 2. And for the record, I was not happy when his career ended, but at the age of 15, I'm not sure I was sad either. If that makes me a cold hearted 15 year old and you are going to judge me... well I pity that you forgot how fucked up you were when you were 15. Anyway, I hated that Russian/Soviet line that the Wings would throw out there against the Hawks in the mid-90s. That line always seemed to kill the Hawks and to this day, those five Russians/Soviets--Vyacheslav Fetisov and Konstantinov on the blue line, then Igor Larionov with Sergei Fedorov and Slava Kozlov between him--scared me more than any professional athelete(s) has ever before or since. The five of them struck the fear of God in me, they were like 1970 Brazil mixed with having to pitch to Barry Bonds and a dash of Barry Sanders. (Note: I never had to root against Jordan and I assume that he was the ultimate fear of God player ever; instead with MJ I always KNEW the Bulls where going to win. It was never a question. It was fact. [post beating the Pistons in 1991]).

4) Phil Garner - If there was ever a bigger asshole as manager, I'd love to know. Garner's tenure in Detroit was short, but man-oh-man did he make me dislike the Tigers as they returned to the AL Central, just like he built a lifelong loathing of the Brewers. He was the King of bullshit managing crap baseball... cheap shots, throwing at heads, spikes up, starting brawls just to start them. He managed the game as if he wanted his team to be labeled as the biggest pricks to walk this Earth. Even though he never played in Detroit, just his three years as manager gets him on this list.

3) Isiah Thomas - Honestly, it's only because he was a classesless son of a bitch after the Bulls beat the Pistons in 1991. Leaving the court with about 8 seconds to play and refusing the shake the Bulls hands after years of battles is about as W.Bush League as you can get. We should not be shocked that he's been horrible at everything he's done since this moment in life. Karma is a bitch. But really, from this point on, Thomas' career has been a disaster. He wasn't allowed on the Dream Team because Jordan hated him so much. The Pistons would never smell the NBA Finals after this moment. Eventually Thomas would tear his Achilles ending his playing career. He was a brutal GM of the Raptors. Brutal coach for the Pacers. The worst GM in the last 20 years while with the Knicks. He ran the CBA into the ground. Sexual harassment lawsuits. Then throwing his daughter under the bus claiming it was she, not he, who ODed. Thomas has been running from his own life ever since he left the court in the spring of 1991.

2) Bill Laimbeer - Hated by Chicago fans. Hated by Boston fans. Hated by Philly fans. Hated by Cleveland fans. Probably the most hated NBA player of the last 25 years, if not ever. And to top it off? HE WENT TO NOTRE DAME! In a way, Laimbeer is like the perfect storm of a hated player--big, annoying, white, cheap shot artist, flopper, tough, would not back down from anyone, always managed to pick a fight with the best player on your team, and he went to Notre Dame. Can you imagine if he ever did post-grad work at Duke? Yikes. Anyway, do not think for a second that the entire Eastern Conference of NBA fans love the fact that he is the coach of an WNBA team. Even if he's the most successful coach in the history of the WNBA. In fact, that's funny, like a punchline sort of... you know in the "is being the best WNBA coach of all time sort of like being the smartest person in West Virgina or the least arrogant person in Manhattan?"

1) Slava Kozlov - In the mid-90s, I developed at hatred for Slava Kozlov for reasons I couldn't even tell you. But let's put it this way... it's one of the all time irrational dislikes in the history of irrational dislikes. There were times when I would punch pillows in the basement and pretend that it was Slava Kozlov's face. The dislike was that great. Die Slava, die.

The Second Worst Offense in the American League

2009-05-15T12:45:00.001-05:00

Sox Record: 15-18; The Sox have a -22 run differential.

Place in the A.L. Central and Games back: Fourth but only 2 out of first.

Most annoying person in the Sox organization: There comes and time and place to rip a guy for sucking. Even if it's not his fault that he's playing, injuries have destroyed this team in center field, but Brent Lillibridge flat out sucks. He stinks. He is not a major league player. And even though there are few situations where he would ever play every day and it's not his fault that Anderson and Wise got hurt... but I'm sorry, I don't have any more patients in my heart. Lillibridge sucks.

Member of the White Sox I love the most at the moment: HI MY NAME IS JI

JIM THOME

AND HOW DO YOU DO

(This was more for Tuesday two home run performance).

Rhetorical Question of the Day: Only the Mariners are scoring runs at a slower pace than the Chicago White Sox in the American League this year. This means one of two things:

1) The Sox O isn't that good.

2) The Sox O is under achieving.

Let's look at reason #2 first.

Thome is a bit bellow last years numbers, but he's been trending down for a few seasons because he's getting old. But he isn't hurting the Sox at the moment. Jermaine Dye is having yet another Jermaine Dye season. St. Carlos of Quentin has fallen off from last year, but again, not a huge drop off and still a productive player. I'd like to see some more power form Konerko, but he's been good this year. And A.J. is hitting better than you'd expect, but nothing out of the ordinary. So the Sox 3-7 hitters have done what they've needed to do. There should be a slight improvement over the next 130 odd games.

Well we all know what comes next... the Sox #1, #2, #8, and #9 hitters are not getting it done. And the stats back it up. Fields has been getting on base but has shown almost none of the power he gave us in 2007. Alexei Ramirez has been so bad, that I think most AAA short stops would be better. Brad Lillibridge, who is only playing because of injuries to Wise and Anderson, has made me long for the days of Andy Gonzalez AND ANDY GONZALEZ WAS THE WORST BASEBALL PLAYER I'VE EVER SEEN IN THE MAJOR LEAGUES! THAT IS HOW BAD LILLIBRIDGE HAS BEEN. YET OZZIE KEEPS PLAYING HIM!!! I find it impossible to believe that the Sox don't have a better option than a guy with an OPS under .500. I could give the White Sox an OPS under .500. By all means, play Pods every day because he can't be worse than Lillibridge. It's nearly impossible.

And finally, I hate to pile on Getz, but he isn't getting on base enough. I know he's being asked a lot, but with the other guys on this team playing so poorly,

The season isn't lost. Anderson will hopefully be back soon, if for no other reason than to knock Lillibridge/Pods out of the line up. Nix looks like a ball player (more on him another day), so let's give him a week at second. And let's hope and pray Alexei Ramirez stops sucking this weekend in Canada.

People will point out that the Sox, at this point last year, had the same record. But the Sox also had a +12 run differential. They had been a bit unlucky at that point in the season. This year? The Sox record pretty accurately reflects how they've played. If they want to 'come back' this year, they need Floyd to stop pretending he's in Philly. And they need to get healthy at the plate... and again, pray that Alexei Ramirez stops sucking and Fields starts to show a little power.

Thoughts on the most bizarre between innings promo ever:

Blackhawks - More on the Hawks later... but let's just say, bring on the Dead Wings. Bring on the Commie Bastards even if they're all Swedish now and everyone loves the Swedes...

Ugh

2009-05-11T11:01:00.000-05:00

Sox Record: 14-16; The Sox have a -16 run differential.

Place in the A.L. Central and Games back: Fourth and they just lost 2 of 3 at home to the Texas Rangers.

Most annoying person in the Sox organization: Alexei Ramirez... here's some advise... go back to Cuba.

Member of the White Sox I love the most at the moment: Mark Buehrle and his inability to suck.

Rhetorical Question of the Day: I really really really hate this team. It isn't fun. It isn't interesting. They stink. They can't score runs, then they can score runs. The Pen is okay, then the pen sucks. They can pitch one day and can't the next. It's maddening. I could see them getting how for a few weeks, but then what? I don't now what the point of this team is and it is May 11th. I have nothing to say about these bums right now.

Thoughts on the most bizarre between innings promo ever:

Blackhawks - Let's close out this series tonight and get ready for the Wings.

After A Month... A Quick Look at the Central

2009-05-08T14:26:00.002-05:00

Sox Record: 13-14; The Sox have a -5 run differential.

Place in the A.L. Central and Games back: They're in third. Everything about the White Sox after almost 30 games screams 80-82 wins, their run differential, their run production, their pitching... there is no reason for anyone on Earth to think other wise. Stats, observation, whatever... but yet, they're in the most average division in baseball history. The Royals are off to a great start, but they're pitching is going to come back to the mean. Greinke may win the Cy Young, but his ERA is going to increase at least two runs over the next five months. There is NO CHANCE that Brian Bannister pitches at this level. None. There's a better chance that W. will be nominated by Obama to replace Souter than Bannister has an ERA under 4.00. Oh and how the fuck is this team averaging 4.9 runs a game? Let's just say that the Royals have had a really good month, and no they aren't going to go away, but this team isn't a 90 win team.

Most annoying person in the Sox organization: It's still Alexei Ramirez. I'm very, very, very mad at him.

Member of the White Sox I love the most at the moment: How about A.J. Pierzynski who is the third best catcher in the AL after a month? Where did this come from? And what the hell is going on with AL catchers hitting the shit out of the ball?

Rhetorical Question of the Day: This is when I say something about Manny... look everyone was doing 'roids. We should be surprised about anyone testing positive or coming out and saying that they did the juice. Other than Frank Thomas, Griffey, Curt Schilling, and maybe Jeter, why even both acting like we're shocked and disappointed and mad? Guess what, rock stars do drugs, movie stars do coke, and athletes do steroids. FACT.

BTW, how did ESPN not blow up this week? Within 48 hours we had Favre is coming back and then not, Manny tested positive for 'roids, and A-Rod returning to the line up. Yet ESPN is still here. How? Would Bonds saying he used 'roids along with Tom Brady retiring put it over the top?

Thoughts on the most bizarre between innings promo ever:

Blackhawks - So I make my way over with The CJ to some Loop bar because we were at some fund raiser at Millennium Park. [I know, a Little at Millennium Park! Who could have guessed it! Every time I think about that park it makes me think of Daley and I get sick to my stomach. But hey, Daley's a Sox fan so I can't get too upset.] ANYWAYS, so we make it over to a bar and it's the second period, half way though, and the Hawks are down 1-0. And for the next 26 minutes, I watch some of themost frustrating and boring hockey on Earth . To say Vancouver was happy with a 1-0 lead would be like saying those people in Coors Light commercials are kind of happy. They packed it in as if they were playing Barca at the Camp Nou (yay footie reference!).

Well that blew up in the 'Nucks face when three of 'em chased a puck along the boards, Ladd got it out to Marty, he had more room than someone with Swine Flu at a Hypochondriac convention. He buried the shot, ties the game, and even though the Hawks blue liners tried to give the game away, the 'Nucks couldn't. The Hawks go on to win in OT as Ladd deflects the puck into the net. Series tied 2-2 and the Canucks need to figure out a better plan of stopping or slowing the Hawks. It's clear the Hawks are a more talented team, but the Canucks have the better goaltender. If the Hawks ever decide to score first in any of these games, how are the Canucks going to come back? But if the Hawks don't score first, Lord knows they have trouble beating the Canucks-Five-Behind-The-Blue-Line game plan. It ain't pretty that's for sure. So for the sake of all things hockey, let the Blackhawks get out to a 1-0 lead one of these days.

An Early Loss That Really Hurts

2009-05-06T10:35:00.000-05:00

Sox Record: 12-14; The Sox have a -11 run differential.

Place in the A.L. Central and Games back: They suck

Most annoying person in the Sox organization: That's it. I'm done with Alexei Ramirez. Sent him back to Cuba. He's hitting .210, he doesn't walk, and doesn't score runs. He's a disaster after a month of the season. A complete and utter disaster. We're at the point where if Brent "I shouldn't be in the majors" Lillibridge took over at short, it wouldn't even be a drop off from Alexei. Go back to Cuba, Alexei... or start hitting.

Member of the White Sox I love the most at the moment: I've been anti-Konerko for two years now, but I've got to give the guy some props, he doesn't suck this year, he isn't killing the team, and is one of the few 'bright' spots because of this. He's still over paid and the Sox probably couldn't give him away at this point, but he's had a nice start to the season.

I also much hate for Greg Norton during his time with the Sox about ten years ago now. Norton air mailed more throws from third in his few seasons than I've seen in my entire life. This is a sad story , but also one of perseverance, about Norton (now with the Braves) and his family. Big ups to Norton and my thoughts go out to him.

Rhetorical Question of the Day: I hate to get all over the top, but that loss last night is a killer. Yeah, we're 26 games into the season and the Sox are only 3.5 out of first and the Royals are about as daunting as Ross from friends, but it would have been really nice to not have lost two games to the Royals. I'm not scared of the Royals, I'm not that scared of the Twins or Tigers... and the Indians slow start looks like it will be a summer long thing. But you can't let the division get away from you. And after two disastrous games in KC, the division could slip away if the Sox aren't careful.

Thoughts on the most bizarre between innings promo ever:

Blackhawks - Wow... one of the more boring hockey games you'll ever seen. Vancouver was more than willing to not go forward unless the Hawks allowed them. The Hawks could never get going, including one of the worst power plays you'll ever see with about 6 minutes left in the third. Brian Campbell, for my money, was the best Blackhawk on the ice last night.

Lunongo played well and didn't give up too many big rebounds which was really the difference in the game. Hawks need to come out and take it to the Canucks tomorrow night. They cannot go down two goals, in other words, they cannot play like they have in the first three games. I know Lunongo is the best goalie in the world and all that crap, but it would be nice if Khabibulin at least played as well as Lunongo one of these games. I'm not blaming him, but a 'stand on his head' performance wouldn't be the worst thing in the world.

I'm Starting to Hate Them...

2009-05-05T15:20:00.000-05:00

Sox Record: 12-13

Place in the A.L. Central and Games back: Fourth and falling

Most annoying person in the Sox organization: Everyone. I hate the White Sox right now. They stink. Everyone good is hurt. Jose Contreras shouldn't have come back. They have scrubs at second, third, right, and in center. Alexei Ramirez may single handily change my policy position on Cuba (i.e. keep the embargo). Brent Lillibridge is not a major league player and I don't need 50 more at bats to prove me right.

Member of the White Sox I love the most at the moment: No one. I hate this team right now.

Number of awkward moments between Hawk and Stone: If the White Sox ever hit a home run ever again, it will be odd since Hawk will be the only guy yelling "You can put it on the board... YES!"

Rhetorical Question of the Day: The Sox have a -10 run differential.

Thoughts on the most bizarre between innings promo ever:

Bulls - I'll have more on them another day, but what a nice run they made int he playoffs. Major bummer they didn't win, but I couldn't have been more unexcited about the Bulls/Celtics series. Then I watched Game One and I was hooked. The next six games were can't miss TV, delivering only one bad game (Game 3) and five great to unbelieveable games. Considering I was at about a 13 with the Hawks, the fact that the Bulls got to 14 is probably the most mind blowing thing this year after learning that Kelly McGillis is gay.

Blackhawks - I missed most of Game One in Vancouver, but the come back only to see them give up one of the worst 3-1 odd man rushes that the Canucks capitalized on to win the game. I then didn't see a second of Game Two...

So Game Three is tonight. I'll have more on the Hawks tomorrow.

(Sox) Bulls and Blackhawks

2009-04-29T18:00:00.003-05:00

Sox Record: 11-10 (in the process of writing this they won today)

Place in the A.L. Central and Games back: Third I'm pretty sure. Is there anything worse than third place? In first, awesome. Second, come on guys! Fourth, bums. Fifth, fucking losers. Third? Meh. I hate third. I could careless about the White Sox right now.

Most annoying person in the Sox organization: Ozzie or who ever decided that carrying five hundred pitchers this year would be a good idea. Because yesterday during the double header the Sox didn't have anyone on the bench with Thome and Getz hurt. And if I spelled Getz wrong, I don't care because he's the type of player who plays when you're in third place.

Member of the White Sox I love the most at the moment: Obama. Still.

Number of awkward moments between Hawk and Stone: I haven't watched much of the last four or five games because of other Chicago sport teams and the fact that this Sox team is boring three weeks in.

Rhetorical Question of the Day: Let's get to the other Chicago sports suddenly becoming more exciting than where will the Swine Flu hit next drinking game.

Thoughts on the most bizarre between innings promo ever: I hate Rondo. I hate Olli Jokinen and his ugly face. I'm starting to gainer hate for the Sedin twins. And Simmons hates Noah.

Bulls - First and foremost, the Bulls should have won the game. Up ten with eight left (or something like that) the Celtics cut it to three with five left and Ray Allen then he fouls out... Bulls should win the game. I'm sorry. But that said...

Rajon Rondo is a dirty player. There's no other way to say it or slice it or look at it or hear it or use any other of one's senses. He's dirty. He's a punk. And he looks like a transvestite*. But Rondo is dirty. He clearly tripped Hinrich in the third quarter when Kirk went flying by him (this shouldn't be a shock, Rondo might be a worse defender than Derrick Rose... and speaking of Rose has Rondo ever not fouled him as he went to the hoop?). ANYWAYS, Hinrich ends up needing to leave to the game because he's got a cut above his eye thanks to Rondo sticking out his leg and tripping him instead of taking getting burned by a white boy from Iowa with grace. This I might add, totally changed the course of the game because Henrick was never the same for some reason.

And then Rondo went head hunting on Miller after he decided not to cover him on the last play of the game. It was obvious, it was dirty, and he admitted that he tried to decapitate Miller after the game. I'll let Simmons defend Rondo. I'll let everyone else point out that Rondo should join the Bruins (insert Rondo being the long lost black Hanson Brother joke here).

As for me, welcome to the Ninny Club Rajon Rondo. I hope Brad Miller punches you in the face tomorrow.

Oh, and as for the officiating. I don't know what to say. It's bad. Calls don't make any sense and the refs are still probably fixing games for either Vegas or TV ratings. I was so close to quitting the NBA last year... but then the Bulls ended up with the #1 pick (probably fixed, but I'll take it) and I'm back. Shoot me in the elbow.

NOTE: Favorite subplot of the series? Ben Gordon taking shots that even college players wouldn't take. My Lord, Ben is putting the NBA back eight years with his performance of chucking up absolute shit. And he was not a good player in Game Five, I'm sorry. He took bad shots, missed 70% of them, and didn't play defense. For most of the night he was the worst Bull on the court. Everyone lived though the Allen Iverson Era in the late 90s and early 00s. It didn't work then, and Iverson was a much better player, and there is no reason to think that it would work now. I can't wait until he's a free agent.

Blackhawks - A few thoughts on the Hawks closing out the Flames.

Game Five was awesome. The Flames were never ever in that game. Hawks dominated. Nothing else to say.

Game Six was even better. Why? Because even though the Hawks were out played, they some how won. This never ever happened to the mid-1990s Blackhawks. Those teams would always lost in the second OT to the Wings getting out shot 392-13 in the process and the only person you couldn't even blame one bit was Eddie Belfour. But this Hawks team? It has a little bit of everything, but I agree with the guys at the Fifth Feather, the D was very good in the first round against the Flames and to see Brent Seabrook come into his own is just an added bonus (btw, for my money, I always notice Seabrook on the ice before I notice Keith).

Back to the Hawks winning a game that they never won when I was a kid... it is a weird experience to see a team not act or play how you remember them to do so. This is in part due to selective memories and all that crap. But at the same time, it's kind of cool to be watching a game and as the thoughts of all those heartbreaks/disappointments past come rushing to your head yet have the confidence that the team will pull it out. Sure it helps having a lead. But at some point, that swagger (Also know as the "we have Jordan swagger") is so dominate that the idea of losing is preposterous.

I don't have that swagger with the Bulls (well I did in Game One believe it or not). I've had that swagger with the Hawks in every game this series. Even game four... which they then proved us all right at the Chip Inn by coming back and tying that game up. I'm not 1998 Bulls or 2005 White Sox confident in the Hawks, but having a 2008 White Sox confidence about a team isn't a bad thing.

* Not that I have anything against transvestites. But Rondo looks like someone John Mark Karr would be scoping out in Southeast Asia.

Greatest Chicago Sports Day Ever (even though it wasn't)

2009-04-22T11:42:00.003-05:00

Sox Record: 7-6

Place in the A.L. Central and Games back: Second? Tied for first? Did the Royals lose? Did the Indians score a lot of runs again? Oh yeah, the Tigers are doing okay too. I should start caring soon...

Most annoying person in the Sox organization: The Forkball that Jose Contreras used to throw. I miss that forkball. It used to get batters out. Now it Contreras doesn't even throw it and that leads to the other team scoring a lot of runs. The Sox are 0-3 when Contreras starts, 7-3 when he doesn't.

Member of the White Sox I love the most at the moment: Octavio Dotel who asked President Obama for a hug at the White House yesterday. Cute or something along those lines. But more importantly, how cool is it that Obama is a White Sox fan? This has to give the Sox nearly as much cred as when they switched to black in the early '90s and became the hat of choice for West Coast Rappers and the amazing "Good Guys Wear Black" ad campaign (I'm still waiting for Wade to break out a "Good Guys Wear Black" shirt).

Number of awkward moments between Hawk and Stone: All I want to know is if Hawk met Obama.

Rhetorical Question of the Day: It took years, but one of the worst relieve pitchers in White Sox history is now, probably, gone forever. Mike MacDougal was all but released today . You have to figure some team will sign up if for no other reason than he can throw a baseball very very fast. MacDougal's greatest contribution to the White Sox was his nick name given to him by fans: The Arsonist. Ozzie wouldn't bring Mike in to put out fires, he'd put him in to start 'em.

Thoughts on the most bizarre between innings promo ever: Much has been said about Saturday being the greatest day in Chicago sports history , and honestly it was the greatest non-championship day in Chicago sports in my lifetime (the Cubs winning prevents it from entering the Greatest Day Ever conversation). I caught parts of all four games. The Sox looked the best, the Cubs the worst on Saturday. But let's break it down:

Bulls - On Sunday morning, Rev. Cleophus James asked his West Side congregation if they saw the light. And for the first time in over ten years, the congregation yelled back, "YES!" And the light was Derrick Rose.

I don't care what anyone says, that was the greatest rookie performance in the playoffs ever. No hyperbole. It was. End of discussion. Boston couldn't stop him and every time the Celtics looked like the would get the fans back in the game, Rose would score in .4 seconds to shut them up. He wasn't good. He was great.

I was at about an 8 for the Derrick Rose Era on Friday night. Now I'm at a 10. I'm excited just thinking about Wade, Rose, Thomas, and Deng out there, bustin' their butts, driving to the hoop, blockin' shots, all that good stuff 18 months from now. Even if the Bulls loses this series, and at this point Celtic fans have to be worried, I'm beyond pumped for the Rose Era.

Cubs - Honestly, how did the Cards not win this game? I watched more of this one than I wanted and every time it looked like the Cards would blow it up, the Cubs would some how put a stop to the bleeding and come back to tie it. And yes, I dropped a few F-bombs directed at members of the St. Louis Cardinals during the afternoon.

The Sox - The after thought of the day, they were up big and never really looked back. I was more interested in the Blackhawks game.

Blackhawks - Falling in love with a player is a magical thing. As a child I loved Carlton Fisk even attempting to mimic his insane on deck circle routine. I fell for El Duque in New Haven, CT. My love for St. Carlos began after I saw him swing a bat in the second game of the season. With Buehrle it's been a steady love... with all that said, after his second goal I told Jonathan Toews that I loved him. He responded as I thought he would, very serious look on his face as he went back to the bench.

I'm not sure how the Hawks won on Saturday. They were out played in the first. And then all of a sudden they cut the lead in half with Toews' first goal of the game seconds into the second period. Then the Hawks tied it up. Then they took the lead when Toews put home his second later in the period. AND THERE WAS MUSIC AND WONDERFUL ROSES THEY TELL ME... I mean I'm at the point with Toews that I went over to iTunes* and downloaded Chuck Berry's "Go Johnny Go." Yes, Toews and I are at that point in our relationship. It's beautiful I tell you. I love how he plays, he's not big, but he goes to the net like a racists on his/her way to a tea party. It's beautiful to watch and it only makes me love the kid from the 'Peg more.

*Does anyone else think that Bush once kicked around the idea of renaming Iraq to... iRack?

Three of four in a Dome? Hawks in playoffs? Bears have a QB? Is this Heaven or Iowa?

2009-04-20T12:06:00.003-05:00

Sox Record: 7-5

Place in the A.L. Central and Games back: They were tied for first. I think they still might be after Farnsworth sucked it up again for the Royals yesterday.

Most annoying person in the Sox organization: Since no one is going to miss Dewayne Wise or Mike McDougal, I can't pick them (though Wise doesn't bother me. He is what he is).

Member of the White Sox I love the most at the moment: John Danks, if for no other reason than I'm going to make an irrational trade in my AL Only League for him.

Number of awkward moments between Hawk and Stone: Going back to Thursday night: Between viewings of "30 Rock" and the Hawks first playoff game since Bill Clinton was President (the 2002 season didn't really count), Jenks loaded the bases and you could tell that Hawks was worried. Then when Gross grounded weakly to Konerko on a 3-1 pitch (figure that one out), Hawk let loose one of the most rediciously OV-AR! ever. How the hell is this booth is supposed to work? I don't know... but a clown and the best color guy in the game in the same booth just gets more and more bizarre every game. And it's only been nine games. What the hell will be going on if the Sox are in this thing (and it looks like they will be) come July?

Rhetorical Question of the Day: It is weird but all the teams in my life that I watch with any regularity (the Sox, Bears, Blackhawks, Badger football, and U.S. soccer) no long fit the description that I'd use for them five years ago. EXAMPLE: To sit here and say something like "the Sox usually lose a game like last (Thursday) night" (they stranded 35 runners last night, got a great pitching performance, and the bullpen nearly gave the game away) would be bogus. Sure the 2003 White Sox lose that game. The 1957 White Sox lose that game if they're playing the Yankees. But the 2005-2009 White Sox don't lose that game. I can't tell you why. But the team that I fell in love with, the team that would have lost 4-3 and broken my heart and ruined the rest of my night... they're gone.

This also applies to the Bears (I assume) because they have a quarterback for the first time in my life (I just missed the JimmyMac days). The Blackhawks aren't a grind 'em out team that they were in the 90s; they're young, can skate, and have loads of talent. And if the U.S. doesn't win in Central America, then it's a disappointment. Really it's only the Badgers, who got good during my youth sports days, that I could ever say something like "they usually lose a game like that" because they've regressed to that point.

My point in all this is that the teams I grew up with and fell in love with are no longer what they used to be. They've changed. There is no pain or heart ache in being a White Sox fan at this point. Sure it's hip and we're all apart of a 'secrete' society and we all have that knowledge that while we might not be the classiest fans in the world, we aren't Cub fans.

Thoughts on the most bizarre between innings promo ever: They yet to play a good first period, but some how the Hawks are up 2-0 on the Flames. The Flames go home down 2-0 and have to feel bummed out... if they win tonight (the Flames) this thing is going six or seven. If the Hawks pull it out, they're going to have a lot of time off before the second round starts. I wish I had more to say about the first two games, but honestly, other than saying it's been fun I don't know what to say. It's been a lot of fun watching those two games.

Sox... and Blackhawks

2009-04-15T18:02:00.002-05:00

Sox Record: 4-4

Place in the A.L. Central and Games back: They're behind the Royals. More importantly, the Tribe is(are?) now 2-7. The A.L. Central is gonna be wide open unless someone goes on a 10-1 stretch.

Most annoying person in the Sox organization: No one is annoying me at the moment. Ozzie is pushing it with his "lets have guys who can't hit or walk lead off!" revolving door. And Konerko's non-sucky start has me not disliking him. And Brian Anderson only annoys me because Sox fans think he's the second coming of Micky Mantle (I was going to say Willie Mays be we all know you cannot compare black players to white players in baseball, basketball, or quarterbacks).

Member of the White Sox I love the most at the moment: Jermaine Dye. Congrats to him on his 300th home run. He also set the record for the most consecutive times an outfielder hits the cutoff man with his 1,439th successful to the cutoff man from right field. Seriously, this is the most over looked aspect of Dye's game and just one of the 472 reasons why it's a joy to watch him play baseball. He never seems to miss the cut off man. And after watching Carlos Lee and Magglio in the early part of the decade miss the cutoff man at least once a game, Dye's job in right field over the last four plus years has been an absolute joy.

Number of awkward moments between Hawk and Stone: None that I've caught. I think this booth will some how work if only because Stone used to work with Harry Carey, and I don't care if you're the biggest Hawk hater in the world (and I'm up there), Carey was a 100 times worse those last few years he was on air. And Stonie didn't kill him, so Hawk has that going for him.

Rhetorical Question of the Day: With the Blackhawks, probably the #2 team in my heart*, starting the playoffs tomorrow; I'm going to start a new section here on this fine little White Sox blog...

Thoughts on the most bizarre between innings promo ever: No not the Connie's Pizza race (they changed it after fifteen years of the stoned sausage pizza running in a race against a strung out cheese pizza and happy to be there pepperoni pizza). It started last year when for reasons that no one can explain, the Hawks had a promo between innings at Sox games. The beauty of this promo was it started with a Thome home run, which turned into Towes and Kane finding a baseball at the UC, they shoot the ball!?!, and all of a sudden Nick Swisher is making a fake catch at the wall robbing them of a home run? It really made no sense, but the best part was the game they had where fans had to shoot a baseball using a hockey stick five feet into a net while some poor college intern had to dress in a goalie uniform and cheer them on. But here was the best part of the promo... no one EVER made it. Seriously, it at the 20 or so games I went to, not once did the fan score a goal. Apparently this is the hardest thing to do in life.

So with that in mind, from here on out, comments on the Hawks will go here. And I'm pumped for tomorrow.

* Despite me not really ever thinking about the Bears during down time, I seem to get quite emtional during Bears games. Fist pumps, jumming up and down and other cliche things that you see guys do in Best Buy commercials. I have no clue what my physical reactions will be as the Hawks start the playoffs against the Flames.

After the First Home Strech of the Year...

2009-04-13T10:54:00.002-05:00

Sox Record: 3-3

Place in the A.L. Central and Games back: Not sure... the Tribe was 0-5 on Sunday morning that made me happy. However, they won yesterday which is a bummer.

Person with the Sox player I hate the most at the moment: No one at the moment. A two game winning steak will do that.

Member of the White Sox I love the most at the moment: I shouldn't say this out loud, but Brent Lillibridge. I was at the game on Saturday, and he walked to lead off the game. This was a shocking development because other than the 3-6 hitters, no one on the Sox are allowed to walk. But there was Lillibridge walking to lead off the game. Then he didn't suck at second base. Then he walked again. And stole a base. And I was like, woah, this guy seems like he's a decent ballplayer, you know one of those guys that you can hide in your line up at the 9 spot or something. Of course, it was at this point that I saw on SouthSideSox that Lillibridge stinks, doesn't hit, doesn't walk, and enjoys striking out . So even though I shouldn't like Brent Lillibridge and his two walk performance on Saturday will probably be his last two walk day with the Sox, I love him at the moment.

Rhetorical Question of the Day: Today is Cubs opening day. Not that I care, but it's always a silly day because half of Chicago takes the day off work and acts like it is New Years Eve/St. Patrick's Day. I call it MoronFest. Not that Cub fans are morons, there are a lot of very smart, good baseball fans that root for the Cubs. But sadly for them, the Trib turned Wrigley Field into a Frat Bar in the 80s and things have gone down hill for the good Cub fans ever since. Now if the team stinks, 40,000 tickets have been sold even if no one shows up in September. And if the team is good it's hard to get tickets and root for the team you like... thus the stadium is filled with annoying late 20s Big Ten graduates. But it's raining today, so Cubs Opening Day appears that it will be moved back a day.

The Sox are in Detroit (there may be more Tiger fans at Wrigley than Detroit tomorrow btw) playing this afternoon. I assume it's opening day for the Tigers, but I'm not sure and I don't feel like looking it up. All I know is that Floyd is on the mound for the Sox and even after 35 good Floyd starts, I don't trust him. And I'm a trustful person. However, the rain here in Chicago has me worried that the Sox won't play today, which sort of bums me out.

Your 2009 Chicago White Sox!

2009-04-09T15:45:00.001-05:00

We are three games in to the White Sox season and I haven't written a word. I've been thinking about just running turning this blog into a "Year in the life of a White Sox fan" blog. And seeing that I could talk about the Sox for about twenty-four hours a day, seven days a week... as every good Chicagoan asks them self, "Why not?".

So this blog has new life. I'm not sure what I'm going to do with it. I'm not sure how it will look. It might die in three weeks. It might be more fun than reading South Side Sox and e-mailing other insane Sox fans about the Sox. I'm going to take it easy. And if it lives, then I'll turn it into something cool. Maybe.

Currently it is just short of 3p.m. And thanks to my wonderful work situation, I am able to take it the day game/rubber match between the Sox and the Royals. At this moment I hate the Chicago White Sox. This is a common emotion in my life. And to be more specific, I hate myself for letting the Sox rule my mood more than I hate the White Sox. It's a 0-0 game, they've scored a total of 4 runs in 25 innings, and there is nothing I dislike more than teams that don't even have base runners.

But more on the Sox as the season goes along. For now, I'll have a running template that I'll fill out whenever I throw one of these up.

Be well.

Sox Record: 1-1

Place in the A.L. Central and Games back: Who cares.

Person with the Sox player I hate the most at the moment: Mike MacDougal (however, this is like saying I don't like the Ayatollah), so I'll take Carlos "Oh fer de season" Quintin. This is fair, but they way baseball works.

Member of the White Sox I love the most at the moment: Matt Thornton

Rhetorical Question of the Day: Does Paul Konerko even have warning track power at this point?

Who isn't doing PEDs?

2008-12-29T11:56:00.002-06:00

So this NHL prospect, Alexei Cherepanov, who died a few months ago in Russia was doing PED it now appears.

MOSCOW -- New York Rangers prospect Alexei Cherepanov was blood doping for several months before he died during a Russian league game in October, investigators said Monday.

Investigators added that during his last year the 19-year-old player suffered from myocarditis, a condition where not enough blood gets to the heart, and should not have been playing professional hockey.

Okay this is hockey. This isn't baseball. Hockey. If hockey players are using PEDs then every NFL player is probably doing PEDs right? I mean, hockey! HOCKEY! You really have to wonder if there is any athlete out there who ISN'T injecting HGH or 'roids of some sort.

White Sox/Rays -- Game Four -- ALDS

2008-10-06T16:01:00.038-05:00

4:01 p.m. central -- You are reading LIVE from Hyde Park here in Chicago! We figure since we aren't going to the game we'll live blog this sucker. Sure it didn't work out in Game One, but we weren't wearing black! Today, we're in full black out gear and the Cubs hadn't finished off one of the biggest flops in playoff history. Plus our soul attention was on the game, today? We've got a paper from Nobel Prize Economic James Heckman and a few articles to read, we've got work stuff to do, some laundry to fold, and we're going to try and make beef stew! What could possibly go wrong?

4:07 -- I'm fairly confident about the Sox bringing home a victory today. Why? Gaven Floyd. Everyone from Philly is laughing at that name, but he's a new man in Chicago. It's rare that a pitcher could suck so much in one place and the pitch so well in another. He's a completely different pitching on the South Side, i.e. he doesn't suck any more.

4:09 -- B.J. Upton homers to left, to make it 1-0. Harold Reynolds informs us that B.J. Upton is the only Ray ever to face Floyd... in high school.

4:13 -- I'm sort of hoping this is the first ever live blog of a sporting event that links to James Heckman. I'm also sort of hoping that Floyd doesn't think he's in Philly right now... Evan Longoria may be the most confident rookie ever. I say that because after a called strike he shakes his head in "I could see that being a strike, only I'm not going to swing at that and ground out" kind of way. This pissed off the baseball gods and he struck out on the next pitch.

4:16 -- Things that are more difficult that stealing a base on the White Sox this season: driving a car on a Sunday morning, making frozen pizza, Paris Hilton... Crawford grounds out and the first inning is over, 1-0 Rays and you know what that means!!! Our first Frank TV commercial! He's Donald Trump in this one!

4:21 -- The nation doesn't fully understand what the Cubs choke/collapse/flop/'word that hasn't been coined yet' means to Chicago. Cub fans were positive they were going to win, there wasn't any doubt in their mind. And they sang "Go Cubs Go" every other minute of the day from July on. And then they went out there and played like the Pirates. And Cub fans no are opening hating on the Cubs. It's amazing. I've never seen anything like it. If a member of the Cubs is murdered in the next month I won't be surprised at all—just sad.

4:32 -- Gabe Gross made a nice catch to maybe rob A.J. of a home run. And not much else... on to the bottom of the second, 1-0 Rays.

4:38 -- The reader is always right here at LOAB! So here is the annoying effing song that I thought was dead and gone forever in 2002. And then after the 2005 season the Cub fans, feeling left out brought this song back. In the '80s as a kid, I sort of liked it. Now? Watching drunk white entitled frat boys sing this song on the street is takes an redeeming quality away the song.

4:44 --I should mention that the Rays starting pitcher is Andy Sonnanstine who reminds me of Andy Samberg for some reason. South Side Sox might have put it best: Sonnanstine -- (SAHN-un-styne)
-verb
1. to shut down an opponent through use of the following method; throw strikes, change speeds and arm angles, all while possessing less than spectacular "stuff"
2. see Marcum or Mussina

4:52 -- B.J. Upton just hit his second home run of the game. 2-0 Rays. He tried to bunt earlier in the at bat.

5:02 -- Sox go down 1, 2, 3 in the bottom of the 3rd. And the bats look bad thus far. 2-0 Rays after three.

5:10 -- Something needs to happen in this game, and B.J. Upton home runs is not something. The crowd isn't really into the game, the Sox bats look bad, and Floyd hasn't been bad, but he hasn't been good (save when he faces Upton).

5:12 -- Comedy of Errors. With Floyd up and a full count, Crawford takes off, Floyd lines one to the left field corner, Crawford scores and on the throw home, it gets away from A.J. and Floyd ends up at third. 3-0... and then Navarro singles 4-0 Rays.

5:14 -- Floyd's day is done. This game has been a disaster thus far. This must be what it felt like to root for the Cubs last week. Richard comes on for Floyd.

5:25 -- The Sox have life... Konerko with a solo shot to make it 4-1.

5:28 -- Sorry we were making our stew. It is now in the oven. We're very excited about this. Anyway, Griffey is up. I keep waiting for him to say, "I want to make it to the ALCS and hopefully the World Series, I will lead by example." Thus far, while Griffey has hit pretty well in the ALDS, he hasn't hit for power. And he just struck out on a bad pitch. Ugh.

5:32 -- I would like to note that the Chicago White Sox season is now in the hands of Clayton Richard.

5:35 -- The White Sox have gotten B.J. Upton out! The White Sox have gotten B.J. Upton out!

5:37 -- Only to give up a single to Pena. Iwamura scores to make it 5-1. I am dejected.

5:39 -- Richard picks off Pena to end the inning. It is 5-1 Rays half way though the game. Are the Sox out of it? No. But other than Konerko, they've looked bad at the plate. The pitching hasn't held. And the defense has been bellow average. The Sox need to get up, work the count, and wait for Sonnanstine to make a mistake. If they get a few runs here, they can put the pressure back on the Rays. But the Sox need to have a good fifth or sixth inning.

5:44 -- So what do the Sox do? They maybe see ten pitches, or was it seven?, going down in order. Juan Uribe sucks again. Just thought I should add that.

5:55 -- Crawford leads off with a walk, but it doesn't hurt the Sox even though he steals second and third. 5-1 Rays, on to the bottom of the 6th. This is the key inning for the Sox.

6:00 -- Dye goes yard! But it's a solo shot and it's 5-2 Rays. This was after two fly outs and me thinking, "if I was at the game I would consider leaving." And now Maddon makes a weird decision... he's pulling Sonnanstine who has been awesome so far. I can understand wanting to bring a lefty in to face Thome... but I don't. The Sox haven't touched Sonnanstine save Konerko and Dye right there. Maddon giving the Sox hope.

6:03 -- Mint Oreo's are really, really, really good. Howell on for the Rays. Crowd back in the game. Why did Maddon take out Sonnastine? If Thome gets on, this move will be questioned for years to come in Tampa Bay...

6:05 -- Oh wait, we're talking about Tampa Bay! No one will ever talk about Maddon pulling Sonnastine in Tampa! Thome grounds out to short (playing second with the shift on) and Maddon may have made the right move. I'm still not sold—I like the Sox chances against the Rays bullpen over the next three innings.

6:17 -- Dotel gave up a double, now Thornton is on and gets Iwamura to strike out. Again, weird decision by Maddon and Harold agrees with me. Iwamura didn't even try to move Bartlett over to third. And now the Sox are walking Upton. Situation: First and second, one out, lefty (Thornton) vs. lefty (Pena).

6:21 -- To say the strike zone today has been consistent would be inconsistent. The crowd is fired up.

6:24 -- And that folks, is probably the season. Pena singles to right, Barlett comes home to score as Dye's throw is up the line. The Cell is silent. And Ozzie is going to have words with the home plate umpire... he thought Pena struck out, but the Sox didn't get the call. It was a borderline pitch... tough call either way.

6:28 -- With Upton looking like he might steal home, Crawford hits one to second. Alexei Ramirez makes a nice play to get the third out of the inning. 6-2 Rays and the Sox only have nine outs to work with... the good news is that the Rays pen is the weakest link to their team. Crossing my fingers...

6:34 -- Beef stew update: we're putting the potatoes in for the last hour in the oven. Risky I know, but I figure it's at worst, a better decision that Maddon pulling Sonnanstine. Konerko leads the inning off with a broken bat fly out to short left center.

6:43 -- Griffey strikes out. Alexei Ramirez singles. Swisher comes on to hit for Wise and, as the fans attempt to will the Sox to a come back, Swisher looks at strike two, only it was ball three... he then pops out to second to end the inning. You can blame the ump, but let's face it, the Sox bats have sucked.

6:59 -- I was talking fantasy trades... sorry about that. Nothing is happening, which is bad news for the White Sox. A.J. on first with two outs in the bottom of the 8th.

7:03 -- Dye strikes out and the 8th is over. Sox are all but done... sigh. And the ad with the cover of "Space Oddity" may be one of the worst covers ever.

7:12 -- Rays continue to be pesky, but don't score in the top of the 9th. Sox have three outs to get four runs... if they don't the season is over.

7:20 -- Griffey steps in with two outs, and he strikes out to end the game... and the season for the Chicago White Sox. The Rays win the ALDS in four games.

Were they the better team? That's fairly apparent. The Sox had their chances in Game Two, and were unable to get it done. While they showed life in Game Three, they looked bad in Game Four today falling three games to one.

Fans cheer the Sox as the Rays celebrate a bit on the field. A fun year for the Sox, St. Carlos Quentin's injury really did the Sox in. A healthy Quentin and I think the Sox take the Rays out in the ALDS.

White Sox/Rays -- ALDS -- Game One -- Second Post

2008-10-02T14:56:00.027-05:00

Live blogging... for the first part go here.

3:07 -- The Sox ran themselves out of the last inning... sigh. But I've got to say, I'm loving the return of Harold Reynolds. He's doing a great job as the color guy. ESPN was stupid for firing him considering what goes on over there.

3:15 -- Reynolds is telling us that Vazquez's body language sucks right now... and Longoria, with the help of astroturf, is killing the White Sox. Longoria singles, thanks in part to the infield being faster than shit, Upton comes around to score and it's 5-3. Longoria is 3-3, two home runs, and three RBIs.

3:17 -- Vazquez's day is done. Clayton Richard comes in. If Richard can get out of this with no more damage, the Sox have a chance.

3:20 -- Crawford singles up the middle, Aybar comes into score. 6-3. This game is getting away from the White Sox.

3:25 -- Richard gets the next two guys to strike out and the inning is over. That could have been so much worse. The Sox need to do something here as we head to the top of the sixth.

3:35 -- The Sox look horrible at the plate... I hate domes... I can't think of anything interesting to say. Sorry, this probably reads dryer than a Provo restaurant.

3:39 -- I wish I was making this up. On the plus side, these guys actually know a thing or two about the South Side.

3:44 -- I am now 50 pages into Chuck Klosterman's "Downtown Owl" and I am still not sure what I think. I think I like it, but I can't say that I do. I think it's boring, but I sort of want to read it. I think Chuck has a thesis, but so far all I can tell is that small town Midwestern life is kind of interesting in a everything is the same and boring and meaningless kind of way. (And if I sound like Klosterman there, sorry). Oh, the game? Top of seven... Konerko just singled.

3:49 -- I'm not sure what's up with this game but I can't get into it. Maybe because I figured the Sox would lose before the game even started? Sox do now have first and second with one out... In other news, this is pretty awesome, funny, and every other adjective you can think in your little head of funny jokes:

I love how it’s all about loving America and being proud of our country, but 75% of the preview makes our country look like it’s in the middle of a raging ethnic war. Anyway, maybe if they had stuffed one or two more stereotypes into the preview more people would have gone to see it. The guitar riff under the title graphic is so “America F*ck Yeah” but it’s serious.

3:54 -- I am pretending that the bases aren't loaded and there isn't one out. I'm pretending that this isn't happening right now. Grant Balfour is now in the game... and no he is not a goalie for the Lightning! He's a baseball pitcher! He only sounds like he's from Canada! But he's really from Australia!

3:57 -- Uribe strikes out. XFM. Let's go Orlando... and people are yelling at each other (Cabrera and Balfour)... that was really weird. Balfour missed far outside, Cabrera then shoved dirt across the plate with his foot, and the two of them started jawing at each other. I'll take the Aussie in that fight, however I think Cabrera is crazy so who knows.

3:59 -- Cabrera strikes out. Balfour pumps his fist at Orlando and tells him to sit down. The Sox inning is over... and this game appears to not be far behind.

4:08 -- Really, Orlando, way to not back up talking trash. Awesome job. I've got to hand it to you it's hard to look as stupid as you do right now. Kudos... In the mean time, Clayton Richard should have started this game. He's looked great and the Rays haven't touched him—2.2 innings, one hit, five strike outs, and looking confident out there on top of it. Game Four starter?

4:13 -- Every Sox fan I know wants more Brian Anderson. So what does Brian Anderson do when he gets a shot? He looks at strike three. Shoot me.

4:18 -- Well on the plus side, the White Sox can't play any worse tomorrow. Bottom of the 8th, 6-3 Rays.

4:28 -- All of a sudden the bases are loaded with two outs in the 8th. Ozzie goes out there and gets Richard. Great effort from Richard... Sox still have a shot if they can get B.J. Upton here.

4:32 -- Dotel gets out of it... down 2-0 to Upton, he comes back with three strikes getting a backwards K for his efforts. On to the 9th. The Sox need three to tie. 6-3 Rays after 8.

4:39 -- Down 0-2, Konerko battles back to 3-2, but on ball three takes off his shin guard and walks to first. Only everyone tells him he's not allowed to do that yet. Baseball gods probably not happy.

4:41 -- But the baseball gods are not unhappy! They reward Konerko for an honest mistake! PAULIE!!! After fouling off three pitches with a full count, Paulie goes big yard, keeping the ball just fair and making the game 6-4 in the 9th with no outs. YES!!!!

4:42 -- Junior hits a lazy, can of corn fly ball to left. One out.

4:47 -- Alexei Ramirez has dug himself a hole here, 1-2 count. On the plus side, the Sox are making Wheeler work and as Reynolds points out, Wheeler doesn't have a pitch to put the Sox hitters away. Let's hope that means the Sox can tie this baby up... Every baseball media type loves Alexei Ramirez... who then strikes out. Two away. Sox down to their last out.

4:49 -- A.J. steps to the plate... Swisher is on deck if A.J. gets on... strike one... ball one... fly ball to center, Upton is under it, and the Rays win 6-4.

4:51 -- Not a good game for the Sox. They had their chances at the plate but couldn't get it done; bases loaded one out, and can't get a run across. On the pitching side... Vazquez wasn't very good, Richard was. The defense didn't help out Vazquez however—the triple to center probably would have been caught by a good center fielder, but Griffey can't play center any more; Vazquez also got a double play ball in the 5th, but Alexei couldn't get the ball out of his glove... a few cheap Astroturf singles later, the Rays blow the game open.

Longoria is your player of the game.

If you had the under on the FrankTV ads, you WIN! I think the final count was 9.

Okay, I'm done here. Enjoy the rest of the games today.

White Sox/Rays -- ALDS -- Game One

2008-10-02T13:34:00.017-05:00

We're going to 'live blog' this game. That's right... live it. Love it.

1:34p.m. cst -- We are coming to you LIVE from our parents basement on the near west side of Chicago! Why the parents basement... they have HDTV. I have to say, I like the Sox chances in this series, but I don't like the Sox chances today. Let's just say John McCain and Republican political consultants are more confident in Sarah Palin nailing the debate tonight than Sox fans are in Javier Vazquez getting to the sixth inning. Seriously, five innings and three runs would be considered a great start for Vazquez.

1:37 -- First pitch is a strike on the outside corner... and eventually flies out to Gabe Gross. I'll say this about the Rays—they are a good team. But their line up isn't all that scary. Gabe Gross? Really?

1:41 -- Sox go 1, 2, 3 and it brings us our first Frank Caliendo of the day! I'm going to set the over/under of Frank TV commercials at 13.5 for today's game.

1:48 -- Vazquez strikes out Pena to end the first. Wow. He looked good that inning.

1:55 -- TBS' camera work is making me dizzy. They keep changing the camera on air—fan, manager, fan, outside shot of stadium, fan, fan, fans, batter, batter from another angle, pitch, fan, fans cheering—STOP IT. Junior strikes out and after nine batters, we've had nine outs.

1:58 -- Evan Longoria goes deep with the first pitch of the second inning. 1-0 Rays. Hope is all gone. Vazquez sucks.

2:00 -- Cliff Floyd *just* misses a home run down the right field line. To a normal pitcher, that's a long strike, to Javier Vazquez it means another moon shot is coming. Ozzie should seriously consider getting Adam Russell up in the pen.

2:05 -- The TV guys (Don Orsillo and Harold Reynolds) are discussing 9 = 8, which I have to say is one of the dumber sayings/rallying cries in sports history because it makes no sense and when someone tries to explain it, it takes far too long. Thankfully, Navarro pops one out to left field to break up the explanation of 9 = 8. Sadly, no one on the White Sox called for the ball and it falls in between Wise and Cabrera for a double that should have been the third out. Thankfully, Vazquez straps on a pair for once and gets Gross to end the inning. That could have been a disaster.

2:08 -- HAHA! LOL! This Applebee's ad is FANTASTIC. Someone asks a rhetorical question: What's are some of your favorite baseball playoff memories. And the first person to answer the question? Mitch Williams! They Wild Thing! The Guy who game up a World Series winning home run in 1993! Was Dennis Eckersley busy the day of shooting? LOL! That was great.

2:12 -- First break for the White Sox. Pena is out of the game and Willie Aybar is now playing first... And you can cancel the post game show. The Cuban Missile singles to lead off the third. A.J. is then greeted by a chorus of boos from the Tampa crowd... these fans have a chance! Booing A.J. is a sign you actually know something about baseball. Kudos Tampa, Kudos. A.J. singles... Sox have something going here.

2:18 -- After Uribe martyrs himself to move Alexei and A.J. over to third and second Carbrera pops out to second. DeWAYNE WISE FOLLOWS WITH A THREE RUN HOME RUN WITH TWO STRIKES!!!! 3-1 WHITE SOX!!!! YOU CAN PUT IT ON THE BOARD...... YES!!!

2:19 -- Dye nails a ball to center for a double. You could argue that B.J. Upton was playing shallow way too shallow. And you might be right. Would have been a tough ball to get too... but weird positioning.

2:27 -- A see eye single, then a long drive to center by Iwamura... only Ken Griffey Jr. is playing center field, so a long fly out turns into a triple. 3-2 White Sox. Shoot me.

2:31 -- Who knew DeWayne Wise had a great arm? He almost throws out Iwamura tagging up on a line out to left. Iwamura (rolls off the tongue doesn't it?) beats the throw barely and it's a tie game.

2:31 and 45 seconds -- Vazquez has thrown two pitches to Evan Longoria and both of those pitches have been killed. 4-3 Rays. Vazquez sucks.

2:39 -- Pena is out of the game because he scratched his eye around the house last night and now has blurry vision. Translation: Pena got drunk and ran into a cabinet while chasing his cats around the house.

2:48 -- The baseball gods do not like it when you swing at a 3-0 pitch... and that's what Cliff Floyd did. He hit the ball 450 feet and foul, but he did. And then struck out. Lesson: When it's 3-0, do not swing at the next pitch or the baseball gods will punish you.

2:55 -- An uneventful 4th inning. No one does much. 4-3 Rays going onto the fifth. And I'm going to start a new post...

How Football Explains America

2008-10-02T10:04:00.002-05:00

Sal Paolantonio wrote a book called "How Football Explains America" and I didn't read it. I don't plan on reading it. But someone in the United Kingdom read it.

And he hated it. Like, really really hated it:

The actual chapters of How Football Explains America are all but unreadable. Paolantonio rehashes a game or a heartwarming football-related anecdote with the gusto of the true bore. Then he explains why this explains how football explains the battle of Midway. Or Davy Crockett. Or manifest destiny. Each chapter more tedious than the last.

Seeing how I know how to use Google, I did just that to see if there was anything else.

Oh shit... Deadspin found this too. Okay, I'm out.

The Best Game I've Ever Seen

2008-10-01T11:45:00.004-05:00

I first heard of the legend of Tito Landrum in late 1987 as a six year old White Sox freak who would watch a VHS tape of the history of the White Sox every so often. Landrum, who hit 13 home runs in 9 seasons, hit a top of the 10th home run in Game 4 of the 1983 ALCS. The home run would win the game, and the pennant, for the Baltimore Orioles.

White Sox starter, Britt Burns, pitched the game of his life. Nine innings, no runs. Sadly the Sox could not scratch out a run. And then with one out in the 10th, with Burns still on the mound, Tito happened. If the Sox win Game 4, they had LaMarr going in Game Five—a slam dunk win—and then they'd beat a not very good Phillies team in the World Series. But alas, Tito effin' Landrum happened.

Last night, in the mist of a black out, looking at the scoreboard from the first base line in the 6th inning I saw Jon Danks and his five innings, one hit line. As Danks wheeled and dealed in the 6th, all I could think was BRITT BURNS. I don't remember ever seeing Britt Burns pitch... but his name was all I could think. "Jon Danks is the 21st century Britt Burns. This cannot happen again."

But let's back track... I was expecting a 7-5 game. Danks and Twins starter Nick Blackburn hadn't pitched all that well recently and Danks was throwing on three days rest. All signs pointed to "oh no...", After going up 1-2 on Denard Span, Danks walked him. "Oh no..." seemed about right. But the Sox got a line out, 5-3 double play, Mauer looked silly striking out, and the first inning was over.

From there the game settled into a fast paced, "somethings going to happen right?" but nothing did happen—until the top of the 5th. Cuddyer—the Sox NEVER lose to the super stars, it's the Cuddyer's, Landrum's, and Teahan's that kill them—doubled and went to third on a sac fly. Harris hit a lazy, short fly to center, I'm thinking there is no way that they'll send Cuddyer... but after Griffey got under the ball, I looked over to third base and Cuddyer took off. Griffey fired a near perfect throw towards home, A.J. caught it, Cuddyer was still a step or two away, and knowing that his only chance was to run A.J. over, he tried just that. But A.J. held on to the ball and as both players picked themselves off the ground, A.J. walked over to Cuddyer and showed him the ball.

He was out.

And the place went crazy. High fives all around, a sea of black started jumping up and down, pandemonium all around. It was like something from a movie.

A few minutes later Britt Burns would enter my mind.

But the Britt Burns thoughts faded when Jim Thome hit a home run that is still traveling south towards the Ohio River. He killed that ball. Before it even landed people we were all looking towards left center the fireworks... only when we saw if finally land, the crowd let out a collective "Holy fucking shit, Jim Thome just hit a ball a million feet! And we have the lead!"

Ozzie sent Danks out there for the eighth—after giving up a single to Harris, Ozzie didn't move. This was Jon Danks' game, and the annoying, pain in the ass, Nick Punto came to the plate. And he grounded into a 6-4-3 double play. We could taste victory.

Bobby Jenks came on for the 9th. Kuble struck out. Span grounded out. Then Ozzie stepped on to the field, the crowd going crazy, waving the outfielders in, only Dye couldn't figure out what the Hell Ozzie wanted. He eventually figured it out, took a few steps in. Casilla sent a duck snort into right center, I'm thinking Ozzie is a genius, Dye's going to get to the ball, only it became apparently Dye wasn't going to get close. The Twins were going to get another annoying, crap, talentless bloop single.

Until Brian Anderson came flying in from left center to make a great diving catch.

The White Sox had won the A.L. Central Division. We were going to Tampa. And we were going to beat the shit out of the Rays.

As myself and a few friends walked west down 35th Street looking for a bar, horns were honked, strangers were slapping five with other strangers. "WHITE SOX!!" The native of Bridgeport came out of their houses down to the corner, cheering on the parading fans and cars. A few people shouted "Let's go Dodgers tomorrow and let's go White Sox on Thursday!" To the cheers of all.

And all I kept thinking was, I hope Britt Burns is at home, on his sofa, drinking a cold beer, enjoying what he came so close to enjoying 25 years ago.

Playoff Predictions

2008-10-01T09:28:00.004-05:00

For what they are worth (take to bank, deposit, they are insured by us and the FDIC):

NLDS: Dodgers and Cubs
Is this mean? A little bit. Are we bias? Not really. We haven't been impressed with the Cubs all year. They needed the Mets to make the playoffs, the Mets didn't, and now they're stuck with a team that is hotter than shit. Oh and Manny has been hitting like some of the greatest left handed hitters of all time, which makes him preforming better than any right handed hitter ever. The Cubs should walk him ever time.
Prediction: Dodgers in Four

Brewers and Phillies
We're happy for the Brewers. It should be fun to see the good people of Wisconsin rooting them. But they're playing a really good team. C.C. can only go twice in this series. The Brewers need him to go about four times.
Prediction: Phillies in four

ALDS: Red Sox and Angels
It's a shame these two teams are facing off in the ALDS and not the ALCS. Two best team in the majors in our opinion. We're not crazy about the Red Sox this year, something just isn't right with them. Angels have gotten every break, but not in a OMG! how did that happen! kind of way.
Prediction: Angels in five

ALDS: White Sox and Rays
We're bias. The fact that no one is taking the White Sox makes me think the Sox may have an upset up their sleeve. A Sox split in Tampa means the Sox move on. Rays can't hit lefties, the White Sox have lefties. Jon Danks was awesome last night.
Prediction: White Sox in four

NLCS: Dodgers and Phillies
A better than you'd think NLCS. Phillies love.
Prediction: Phillies in seven

ALCS: White Sox and Angels
The Sox have played the Angels tough for years now, but this isn't the same Sox team that could do a few things other than hit a home run. God's Soldiers are pretty darn good and we can't see our beloved Sox getting past them.
Prediction: Angels in six

World Series: Phillies and Angels
The Angels have been the most consistent team in baseball this year. With Tex their lineup has come together. They have the pitching. They have the bullpen. And while the Phillies are a very very good team, however they aren't as good as anyone in the American League save maybe the White Sox (I'm pretty sure the Sox would beat any NL team in the World Series). The 2008 Angels aren't sexy, but they might be the best team since the late '90s Yankees.
Prediction: Angels in Six

This Never Gets Old

2008-09-22T23:45:00.004-05:00

Maybe you have to live in England for a few months (weeks?) to really appreciate this... or maybe you just need a little bit of a sense of humor, an enjoyment for cheese Brit pop, and some sort of nationalistic pride.

I sort of wish someone had done this for the Olympics with the men's basketball team. Instead we got stuck with the totally awesome, but commercial, Marvin Gaye ad. The Marvin ad was a money making opportunity... it wasn't about American pride or living and dying with the U.S. hoops team... it was about making money. Which of course makes it American just because of that fact.

But why didn't/don't we, as Americans, get into the Men's National Basketball team? It's the closest thing we have—in terms of passion and cultural significance to the general population—to soccer in England and Germany or Argentina etc. U.S. hoops is beautiful to watch: anyone who watched any of those Olympic games were treated to some great basketball—free flowing, athletic, well played games. And this year's Olympics was the perfect storm: the team had been defeated four years before, this was the team where we still believed... where basketball was coming home. But few people seemed to care.

And this is what always bothers me about the Men's National basketball team: here we are in a highly nationalistic country, where the flag transcends symbolism and defending our country is seeing as one of the highest honors, but when it comes to getting behind a Team U.S.A. -- well that support isn't there. Sure for a few days in the winter of 1980 it was there, but other than that, when did people ever care about Team U.S.A.? Yeah the soccer heads have their diehards (yours truly included) and the basketball and baseball teams will get some love, but not at the English level of love. Where it's stop what you're doing, England is on the telly playing ____!!! WE STILL BELIEVE!!!

So what gives? Is it race? Is the sight of 12 black men playing basketball the reason why most of American shrugs it's shoulders and only cares if they lose and then starts calling them selfish thugs? Or do we not care about about Team U.S.A. for some other reason? Do we prefer the story of hardship more than the story of team works? Has the story of the individual been so ingrained into our heads that the idea of the team is sort of ignored?

I'm not sure... these are rhetorical questions but ones to consider of course. I just know that one day, I'd love to watch a catchy, cheesy song on youtube about Team U.S.A.

Thanks to That's On Point for jogging the mind...

Ed Hochuli's British Cousin

2008-09-22T08:20:00.003-05:00

By now, anyone who follows the NFL has seen the awesome call by Hochuli where he helped the Broncos cover in their game against the San Diego Chargers a week ago. Some people said that Hochuli's early whistle which declared Jay Cutler's fumble to be an incomplete pass was a bad mistake. We think it only adds to the mounting evidence that the NFL and Vegas is just one big conspericy to take all our money and buy sub-prime mortgage futures... but we digress.

Now comes news out of England that our (and Elton John's) favorite footie team, Watford, got screwed when the ref awarded Reading a goal... even though it wasn't a goal. And if you think I'm making this up... the players and coaches at Reading agree!

Stephen Hunt, who was kind of sort of but not really awarded the goal, called it "the worst decision I've ever witnessed in football." Reading coach Steve Coppell said that he would be willing to replay the match. It seems like everyone is in agreement: the only person who thought it was a goal was the ref... everyone else is just sort of, well shocked, or calling it an optical illusion.

So take heart, Mr. Hochuli, you are not alone in making bad calls that blatantly change the outcome of the game. The reasoning behind your decision may have been different than young Stuart Atwell's (the ref in the Watford/Reading clash), but at the very least the two of you can vacation together in Keci Buku over Christmas and Boxing Day.

Oh and the game ended in a 2-2 tie if you still care...

Alexei Ramirez

2008-09-20T12:19:00.003-05:00

The greatest thing to come from Cuba in the last 40 odd years may just be White Sox second baseman Alexei Ramirez (granted his competition isn't too tough since we currently don't allow anything from Cuba to come to the United States).

And what's amazing about Ramirez is that it's starting to look like he's going to hit more home run this year than walks. Currently Ramirez has 19 home runs and only 14 walks, which we figured must be some sort of record (btw, we'll discuss the value of a .300 hitter who never ever ever walks another day but that .320 OBP sucks).

But Ramirez's 'feat' isn't all that special. To our surprise it happens a lot. Like almost once a year.

This is an old Baseball Prospectus article (from 2001), but according to the article it has happened 76 times... which sort of makes sense until we saw that it happened 46 times between 1979 and 2000. Hell, Andre Dawson won an MVP award by hitting more home runs than walking... this is mind boggling in a way (and I'm sure every stathead ever will tell you Jack Clark getting robbed in '87 is almost as criminal as when Albert Belle lost to Mo Vaughn).

Anyway, the article is a good, fun read. And best of luck to Alexei and his fantastic Cuban name in the next week or so. May he not walk.

Retorical Question: Baseball

2008-09-16T14:15:00.000-05:00

What would happen if Ned Yost was the manager of the Mets?

Fantasy Football Retorical Question

2008-09-16T14:05:00.000-05:00

When was Vernon Davis ever good? Did I miss that season? That game? Has there ever been a more hyped fantasy football player who did less?

Bad Idea Jeans

2008-09-12T13:14:00.001-05:00

Guy #1: Hey, we've got our apartment. We ripped up the floors, pipes, wiring, and having everything completely redone.

Guy #2: You're renting, right?

Guy #1: Yeah.

[ image on screen: BAD IDEA ]

Guy #3: Well, he's an ex free-base addict, and he's trying to turn around, and he needs a place to stay for a couple of months.

[ image on screen: BAD IDEA ]

Guy #1: [ tosses bottle to Guy #2 ] Head's up!

Guy #4: Now that I have kids, I feel a lot better having a gun in the house.

[ image on screen: BAD IDEA ]

Guy #3: I thought about it, and even though it's over, I'm going to tell my wife about the afffair.

[ image on screen: BAD IDEA ]

Guy #5: I don't know the guy, but I've got two kidneys and he needs one, so I figured..

[ image on screen: BAD IDEA ]

Guy #2: Normally I wear protection, but then I thought, "When am I gonna make it back to Haiti?"

[ image on screen: BAD IDEA ]

John McCain: I know I'm 72 years old and have had cancer, but I figure, when else am I going to run for President and be able to choose a woman whom I've met twice and has never met any world leader, has less than two years of experience managing anything other than a small town in the middle of no where, has the same policy positions of the most unpopular President since the Second World War, AND doesn't believe in dinosaurs to be my Vice President?

Guy #2: Did you at least vet her?

John McCain: Of course not!

[ image on screen: BAD IDEA ]

Announcer: Bad Idea Jeans.

[ shows a group of tough looking basketball players on the court ]

Guy #1: Hey, you guys ready? Let's bet these guys! A hundred bucks.. make that two hundred! Two hundred bucks!

[ fade to image on screen: BAD IDEA JEANS]

I Don't Watch ESPN Enough

2008-09-08T14:23:00.004-05:00

It was a big deal the moment James Brown interrupted the Jets/Fins game to tell us that Tom Brady had been hurt.

But non-stop coverage? Funeral like tone on the ESPN set? Majority of the time spent on Brady's injury which no one knew anything about?

When did Tom Brady become bigger than Brett Favre or T.O. over at ESPN? Hell, how many people actually care about Tom Brady? He's Tom Brady, that's it. I never knew he was so loved outside of New England that we had to pretty much stop broadcasting anything that had to do with baseball and cut all NFL coverage to 3% of what it normally is.

I like Tom Brady. I hope he gets better. But he's sort of bland... have you ever seen the guy interviewed? Not the most interesting of interviews. He doesn't even smile half the time. He was always just a guy who was pretty good and happened to win three Super Bowls. He was never a five star, stop the presses sort of athlete.

But ESPN is treating it as if he is Favre or T.O. I'm confused, that's all... because Brady was never a media whore like those other two. And therefore, I assume, most people's opinion of Brady was one of somewhat indifference (unless of course you are/were jealous of him).

I guess what I'm saying is that, I never thought of Tom Brady if he wasn't on the football field. And while the injury should be the #1 story... we've already reached Brady-overload. And at 1pm central we never in the world thought we'd feel that this story would be over-reported 24 hours later.

See, ESPN is tricky like that sometimes.

As for the Pats future for the rest of the year... check this out.

Your 2008 AFC!

2008-09-03T10:28:00.003-05:00

We had so much fun spitting out our NFC predictions yesterday, we figured we do it again. But before we get to the AFC, can we just say one thing that's really annoying us? SportMediaHeads football predictions. Not the writers... but the Heads on TV. Is it against the law to pick New England, Indy, or even San Diego? What's up with this crazy picks? Mike and Mike choose two teams—Jacksonville and Pittsburgh, and then Mr. Hodge agreed with the Jax pick—that it was sort of like watching John McCain pick his vice president. In other words, it was obviously unobvious. You're trying to throw us off, but really you're only doing it to throw us off. Or something like that. It's just stupid. Anyway, our horrible picks:

East - The division is better than people think. Miami won't be good, but the Bills and Jets won't be bad.
1) Patriots - Too easy.
2) Bills - If Edwards improves this team could go 10-6 with their schedule.
3) Jets - Favre has had one good season in the last five years. He's old. And his greatest talent in the last ten years has to been to throw horrible interceptions (unless he's playing the Bears or Vikings).
4) Dolphins - Fish. Outta. Water.

North -
1) Steelers - Like a hard SAT question, process of elimination.
2) Browns - What if I were to tell you that Derek Anderson and Kurt Warrner were from the same planet. You'd believe me wouldn't you? But if I were to tell you that Scott Mitchell and Derek Anderson were from the same planet you'd believe me also? Well we're gonna find out which one Mr. Anderson is from this year!
3) Bengals - Has a team ever gone 4-12 and finished in 3rd?
4) Ravens - Rookie QB to start! Rookie QB to start! Offensive line not as good! Tough schedule! Run away!

South - Best division in the NFL and not as college footbally as the NFC South!
1) Colts - Sometimes I think Peyton Manning is still young. Sometimes I think he's been around my entire life. And sometimes I enjoy his commercials. Life is just like that... sometimes.
2) Jaguars - We're sort of rooting for them... personal reasons.
3) Titans - This is the year that Vince Young is asked by friends if he'd like to train and fight pitbulls. Mr. Young's decision will have more impact on the NFL than the collective bargaining agreement coming to an end.
4) Texans - Go away. No one likes you. Your name sucks. Your uniforms suck. Your city sucks. Just leave us alone. Move to L.A. Just go. Can you imagine a team ever calling themselves something like the New York New Yorkers? Or the Chicago Illinoise? The Texans make me want to throw up.

West - Was this division cooler in the 1960s, 1970s, or the 1980s?
1) Chargers - When are they going to go to the baby blues?
2) Raiders - Why not? When was the last time we had an NFL team with more "fuck it" potential? Sure the SexCannon Era was great because the "fuck it" potential was always there. But this team has a QB that can throw the ball a million yards, a rookie running back who is a Bo Jackson SI article waiting to happen, and a few wide outs that can run a bit. I'm excited. Plus the D is pretty good.
3) Broncos - Really? Do we have to keep pretending that they're good? Why can't we just admit that the Broncos haven't been good for a while now (save that lucky playoff game against the Patriots three years ago).
4) Chiefs - The favorites for the #1 pick in April. No QB. No O-line. No secondary. No wins.

Wild Card: Jaguars, Bills

First Round: Colts over Bills, Steelers over Jaguars

Round Two: Patriots over Steelers, Colts over Chargers

AFC Champions: Colts over Patriots

SUPER BOWL:
Colts over Seahawks

Don't ask me how that happened, but it just did. Wow.

NFC Picks

2008-09-02T13:49:00.002-05:00

Ugh, another NFL season is upon us. We couldn't be more unexcited. Our boredom with the NFL was well documented... not sure where they are, but they're there somewhere. Therefore, let's make this clean and quick.

East - Hands down the most overrated division in the NFL. None of these teams are bad. But they're all flawed. All four teams will finish between 10-6 and 6-10... I could even see the winner being 9-7 and the 4th place team being 7-9.
1) Redskins - Who knows. Why not?
2) Cowboys - If they don't self-destruct I'll be shocked. Still too good not to be a playoff team.
3) Eagles - Pretty much I like the Redskins more than them. That's the only difference.
4) Giants - Too many injuries. Too many teams looking to take aim at them.

North - The worst division in football.
1) Bears - Again, why not? The schedule isn't killer. Toughest road game is the opener in Indy. After that they could beat anyone they play on the road.
2) Vikings - Schedule is pretty tough. And they're one injury from being not so good.
3) Packers - I like Aaron Rodgers the first time when he was in Detroit and we called him Joey Harrington.
4) Lions - They're horrible. As always. What's amazing is that they're not even close to being the worst NFL franchise of all time.

South - The division that no one cares about because college football is bigger there!
1) Saints (LSU) - Easy schedule! Great offense!
2) Buccaneers (Florida/Florida State) - Really? Can't we do better?
3) Panthers (Clemson/South Carolina/even UNC!) - A disappointing season waiting to happen for the fourth year in a row!
4) Falcons (Georgia) - Ha.

West - What's the difference between the NFC West and the AL West? Somewhat non-descriptive, yet intriguing.
1) Seahawks - It's getting to the point where it's death, taxes, USC winning the Pac-10, and the Seahawks winning the West. Remember when they were in the AFC?
2) Rams - They can't be worse.
3) 49ers - I love the "Wanna grab a burger at J.R. O'Sullivan's" joke.
4) Cardinals - The worst franchise in the NFL! I would love it if Brady was traded to the Cardinals and then all of a sudden started throwing picks like Favre.

Wild Card Teams: Cowboys, Buccaneers

First Round: Cowboys over Bears, Redskins over Buccaneers

Second Round: Seahawks over Redskins, Saints over Cowboys

NFC Champs: Seattle Seahawks

We have 1% confidence in these picks. The NFC is a friggin' mess. It's like the NBA East only worse. Amazing.

The Minority: We're Gonna Miss Jay

2008-08-26T22:39:00.005-05:00

Sad news out of Chicago tonight. Jay Mariotti has resigned from the Chicago Sun-Times.

From Jim Kirk at the Chicago Tribune:
"...Mariotti said in a phone interview Tuesday night that he decided to quit after it became clear while in China that sports journalism had become "entirely a Web site business. There were not many newspapers there.'' He added that most of the journalists covering the Games were "there writing for Web sites.''...

"He [Mariotti] said that he "is talking with a lot of Web sites'' and added that the future of his business "sadly is not in newspapers.'' Mariotti said that he sent a resignation letter to Cyrus Freidheim, Sun-Times Media Group Chief Executive and Sun-Times Publisher."

We're going to miss Jay. He was quick to turn a phrase and did it better than pretty much anyone in the nation. Mariotti's unique view on the Chicago sports scene was nearly as welcomed as a cup of coffee in the morning. His columns could be controversial at times, but they were usually right on target. All too often it was up to Jay to point out the hidden truths and media cover ups of Chicago sport personalities. When the Bears, Hawks, Bulls, Cubs, Notre Dame, and even the Sox, made a mistake or a bad move, it was Mariotti who usually there to point it out before the rest of us even knew what was happening.

Mariotti was unafraid to go after the most holy of holy in Chicago—from Jordan to Ozzie—he gave no one a free pass. He sought out the truth and, more importantly, pointed out what he believed the truth to be. His opinion mattered because it was well thought out and based upon sound logic. That is the hard hitting journalism and insight, which made Mariotti the best sport columnist in the United States... hell the world.

We're gonna Jay. We're sure the blogs will be all happy about his decision to leave, but not us. However, if this means more Mariotti on "Around the Horn" and other ESPN panelist shows, then maybe just maybe we can convince ourselves to be for the move.

So Jay, this Zima is for you. I know you'll land on your feet somewhere. But know that I'll miss those mornings, sitting at my parents kitchen table in Hinsdale slurping up Corn Flakes, and agreeing with every single word you wrote.

College Football Predictions

2008-08-26T18:53:00.004-05:00

More because we can and we're sort of thinking about it today.

ACC - The conference that, in theory, is supposed to be good. Sort of like socialism.
- Atlantic: Wake Forest -- I know nothing about these guys other than they've been pretty good the last few years. And Clemson does one thing well—not win anything in the ACC.
- Coastal: Who cares. No one here is any good. Virginia Tech will probably win it just because someone has to. On the plus side, the ACC Coastal has locked up two awards—worst name for a division AND worst division in college football!
- BCS Team: Ugh. Wake Forest. Wow the ACC sucks.

Big12 - Hey look, it's the most overrated conference in college football! Big Ten teams rejoice!
-North: Missouri—One thing is for sure, it won't be Kansas the worst good team in college football history. Colorado will be good one of these days right? If Colorado played Washington would it be considered retro?
-South: Oklahoma—I'm going to say it, the Big12 South is better than the SEC West. It's going to be hard for the Sooners to go undefeated in conference play.
- BCS Team: Texas (remember them?), Oklahoma. I don't know about you, but I can't wait to see them lose by 17 in the BCS.

Big East - Pittsburgh - If anyone claims they know what is going on in this conference this year, they're full of shit. Why Pitt? Why not? West Virginia seems to find a way to not make the leap year in and year out (the drubbing of Georgia a few years ago excluded). Pitt's toughest conference game is on the road at South Flordia, who no one knows anything about save they were #2 at one point last year. So why not Pitt? A win of Iowa in the third game of the season would go a long way.
- BCS Team: Pitt

Big Ten - Ohio State - This is the best team in the nation but no one wants to admit it because they've lost the last two BCS games. But they have pretty much everyone coming back from a team that didn't get beat as bad as everyone says they did in the national title game. If they beat USC they're going back to the National Title game, because after that only a trip to Madison will stop them.
- BCS Team(s): Ohio State, Wisconsin

Pac Ten - USC - Death, taxes, and USC winning the Pac 10, or something like that. Anyway, no longer the #2 conference in America it's still pretty good. But I don't see that second BCS team... oh and Arizona State isn't that good.
- BCS Team: USC

SEC - This really might be the most talent and the best teams a single conference has ever had. Wow are they loaded. And I would not want to play 'Bama in the second half of the season.
- East: Florida - Did you see that offense last year? It was sick. It was awesome. It was fun to watch. It was everything we love about college football. We don't see them losing to an overrated Georgia squad (which isn't the Bulldogs fault, they're a top five team, but not #1).
- West: LSU - We don't want to pick them, we but since they get 'Bama at home and Auburn doesn't... well we'll take the Tigers. The LSU Tigers.
- BCS Teams(s) - Too bad they can't send three. Florida, Georgia

Non-BCS conferences:
- We love us some Boise State.
- Notre Dame goes 6-6, we see four wins on their schedule. Then a bunch that could go either way: Michigan, Purdue, @UNC, @Washington, @BC, and Pitt. The disaster scenario has them at 1-3 when Stanford comes to South Bend. Unlikely, but not impossible. Fact is, no one knows. 9-3 is just as sane as 5-7. And if ND goes 5-7, I'm not sure what to say about Coach Charlie Weis.
- BCS Team: BYU

National Title:
Ohio State vs Florida. I'll take Ohio State this time.

Back For No Cash

2008-08-25T21:09:00.005-05:00

You're favorite first person plural blog is back... call on the angels in Orange County, you know you've been missing us.

We're new and improved and maybe even with a new look. It all depends on how much time we want to put into that... but either way. We're back. Blogging. The joy can be heard from here to China.

Why are we new and improved? Because we are for starters. We're wiser and better writers, hey hey!, and with fall fast approaching here in Chicago, the ideas will flow like beer in the bleachers of Wrigley.

But from now one Views From Life on a Bench will focus in on sports and sports only. I know crazy since that's kind of sort of what we were doing anyway. But that is the deal. We hope to look at things from an economic point of view and hopefully offer up some thought provoking things. Don't expect us to look for crazy ass sports stories about athletes, we don't care for starters and secondly, the fact that Matt Leinart likes to do beer bongs doesn't really interest us.

So look for, well, the other side of sports. Our goal isn't to post as much as we can. Our goal is to writing some interesting stuff and if it has an economic or intellectual point of view. All the better.

So sit back and use those eyes you've got. Reading hasn't been this much fun since you were reading The Love Song of J. Alfred Prufrock.

Get ya.

Oh and don't forget to check out I Wanna Live With a Musician. It's more personal, more serious, and more interesting. If you don't like sports. And we don't write in italic over there.

IWLWaM Fired Up Again

2008-01-05T22:13:00.000-06:00

We fired up our music blog, I Wanna Live With a Musician again. We think some of our better work is over there. So hit it up.

Other than that... I don't think we've cared less about sports than we do right now. We'll be fired up for Ohio State and LSU. But we can't get into the NBA this year. We really HATE the NFL playoffs right now (Wake us next week only for the AFC games). So that leaves us wanting some footie, which we can get, but sadly no Champions League for two months. SOOOOO... it's been all about the NHL for us here at VFLOAB.

We'll do more soon. We promise. Have to bang out the top 30 songs of 2007. We suck. We know.

The Wire starts up again for season 5. If you haven't seen the other four seasons, just wait until you see them. This is the Greatest TV Show EVER remember. It's better just to start from the beginning.
if you walk with Jesus
he's gonna save your soul
you gotta keep the devil
way down in the hole

Links

2007-12-28T19:05:00.000-06:00

I've had like five articles linked up on Firefox for the last week and I've very slowly read them. Anyway, they're all worth the read if you ask me.

Because you can never have too much Chuck Klosterman in your life. I was thinking about Chuck the other day... he's only 9 years older than me, but he might as well by 15 years older than me. Yes folks, that's who wide the gap is between Gen X and Gen Y!

While the Mafia in Sicily seems to have taken a few shots and might be losing some of their grip on their power, the 'Ndrangheta is alive a well. And controls the coke trade in Europe.

All you ever wanted to know about the Subprime crisis. And if you ask me, it's not nearly as complicated as it appears. Well the derivative stuff is complicated, but the gist of what went wrong (loaning money to people who shouldn't have been loaned money) is pretty easy to 'get'.

Honestly, a long but amazing history of the War on Drugs. What I find the most amazing is that an issue that should be driven by policy has so often been driven by politics. I mean, who votes one way or the other because of drugs? That said, the policy has been far from perfect over the years. But it does go to show that destroying the supply will not change anything until we tackel drug use here in the States. That means going after the rich whites who are involved in drugs. (BTW, kudos to the Supreme Court to correcting the unjust, institutional racism that were the crack and cocaine laws).

Finally, a very interesting read on IQ and how flawed the test is. Maybe another case of institutional bias? Probably not, but it goes to show that IQ does test anything other well, read it.

It may shock those who know me, but I'm rooting for BC against Michigan State (and the Big Ten) in the Whatever Bowl Sponsored by Whomever game right now.

Bhutto isn't Mandela

2007-12-27T12:48:00.000-06:00

The media coverage of Bhutto's tragic assassination on CNN is making her out to be something she really wasn't.

The thoughts and claims that Bhutto this pro-Democratic force is off base. While by no means anti-democratic she also wasn't this huge, Nelson Mandela like pro-democracy force. She was completely and totally corrupt - managing even to piss off the Swiss banks which in itself is an accomplishment. The idea that she went into 'self-exile' is pretty far off since she either had to leave Pakistan or be arrested on corruption charges. So she left.

Going back to this idea of democracy and Bhutto, in October she cut a deal with the US and Musharraf to come back to the country. This happened because Pakistan has have an election; there's also an Islamic party whose leader was also in exile (and may have come back, I'm not sure) which the US and Musharraf do not want to take power. So the US wanting no part of this party in the election because of their Islamic ties looked else where. As a result, a deal was cut with Bhutto since she was the lesser of two evils (btw her party either leans towards or is socialist - gots to love that go Communism says the USA!). Basically, the US in an attempt to prevent an Islamic government from taking over in Pakistan (which would be a complete and total disaster) decided to throw their support towards the socialist party. A moth ago this Islamic party, the Pakistan Muslim League, called off their boycott of the election to take place on the 8th of January. A lot of this - I believe - was being done to split the vote and allow Musharraf to stay in power. The US can't lose Pakistan as an ally and they knew at the same time that Pakistan couldn't be an undemocratic country.

I have no clue what Bhutto's death will lead to or what it 'means'. Will the elections be delayed? Will Musharraf declare emergency powers? Who knows. Hopefully it ends peacefully.

The NFL Mitchell Report

2007-12-13T11:58:00.000-06:00

With Major League Baseball just minutes away from being dealt the blow that will be the Mitchell Report, where players both good and bad are about to be called out for their 'enjoyment' of steroids, I thought today would be a good day to bust out the 'what would the NFL Mitchell Report' look like.

Here's a list of guys who have some sort of connection to steroids in the NFL since 2000 or so:
Bill Romanowski*
Barret Robbins*
Dana Stubblefield*
Chris Cooper*
Jeff Mitchell
Todd Sauerbrun
Todd Steussie
John Milem
Henry Taylor
Dave Fiore
Wesley Walls
Kevin Donnalley
Ray Edwards*
Obafemi Ayanbadejo*
Shawne Merriman*
Rodney Harrison
Ryan Tucker*
David Boston*
Marcus Stroud *

*Tested positive for steroids or THG; here's a list of banned substances by the NFL.

But here's the thing with NFL suspensions - they don't always say if a player was suspended for steroid use. For example, Shaun Rogers was suspended last year, but we don't know for what. Travis Henry is another guy who may have violated the NFL's policy for something other than pot.

Anyway, getting back to what would the NFL Mitchell Report look like, let me make this quick - if there actually was a NFL Mitchell Report, we wouldn't be talking who was on the list, we'd be talking who WAS NOT on the list. See, as bad as baseball's steroid problem is (or was) the NFL's problem is much, much worse.

The problem in baseball is an obvious issue. But in the NFL, a game that we as a viewing public watch differently than baseball, may even be bigger. I don't know about anyone else, but if steroids are so useful in baseball, a game where strength and speed isn't as necessary as
in football, then wouldn't it make more sense for NFL players to be doing the juice? In a game where being bigger and stronger than the other guy is much more beneficial then well... I'll let you connect the dots. But I believe that most players in the NFL are probably using steroids, after all I don't know any 6'1", 250 pound men who can run 40 meters in less than 6 seconds let along 5 seconds.

I will say, that we follow and watch the NFL much differently than baseball. Baseball is the romantic, artful, intellectual American game. While we watch football in a much different manner - we gamble on football, it's a violent game, the players strap on armor to go into 'battle' to 'fight' the other team. It's a tactical game, where strategic takes place to prepare the team for the single battle once a week. Football is a battle, it's a war. And we watch it that way, so if the other players are willing to destroy their bodies, then that's okay by us - hypocritically of course.

George Carlin puts it best:

Mission Accomplished

2007-11-29T22:20:00.000-06:00

I was thinking about this for some reason today... maybe it's because there may actually be light at the end of the tunnel. Maybe it's because we've only got a year left of what will almost certainly go down as one of the worst tenures in the White House. (Yeah, we know, people said similar things about Truman, but you know what... they also said that about Jimmy Carter, Richard Nixon, James Buchanan, and Ulysses S. Grant).

Anyway, I'm watching it, and looking back four plus years later, Bush looks utterly ridiculous in that flight suit. Maybe at the time it didn't seem so ridiculous, but now it looks silly. Sort of like a 5 year old girl dressing up as a princess.

The coverage of the event is interesting. I don't really know how to describe it. Things seem deceptively quiet, sort of like being in the eye of a hurricane. No matter, here is Bush saying Mission Accomplished. Just a bit outside...

College Football Thoughts - Notre Dame vs Stanford

2007-11-24T17:12:00.001-06:00

For some reason, the Notre Dame v. Stanford game is on ESPN as I write this. The two teams are 5-17 combined. Considering the slate of games today, I would rank this one some where in the 30s in terms of games that I'd actually want to watch.

It's one thing for Notre Dame to have their TV contract with NBC. But is ESPN really pulling the ratings that would justify Notre Dame and Stanford? Just quickly looking at the list of games today, here are games that are just as 'good' or better as the ND/Stanford match up:
Duke/UNC
Maryland/NC State
Wake/Vandy
Oregon/UCLA (which is on ABC but we ain't getting it here in the Midwest)
Oklahoma/Oklahoma State (which I can't find on TV)

More interesting than anything else - I'm assuming that the ESPN bean-counters believe or can prove that ND will pull better ratings than any of those games above (though I think that Big12 game might be tough to get on ESPN because of conference TV deals).

Needless to say, we're not watching the ND/Stanford game.

It doesn't happen often, but Paul McGuire has moved into Ron Santo territory - he's so bad, he's great. Rarely do announcers regress to the point where they become so annoying and so lame and so bad that they actually become ironic. Anyway, I think Paul McGuire has reached the point where there a situation where Paul McGuire wouldn't be fun to have around.

I know this isn't football related, but what's the point of the ACC/Big Ten Challenge? We all know the ACC will go 6-3 or something... so who cares?

I could name four SEC games alone that have been more fun to watch than every NFL game this year. So when Bill Simmons goes on about how this is a great NFL season, he's clearly not watching college football.

I'm still amazed that 10 Big Ten teams are bowl eligible - sure only 8 are guaranteed a bowl, but 10 teams from the Big Ten could be playing in a bowl this season. And amazingly, Illinois has a decent shot at making the BCS - they sit 17th right now but look as if they'll move to 14 or 15th tomorrow. Taking away the six conference winners that leaves 4 at large spots - Hawaii looks like they're all but in one of the BCS games at this point, and Georgia is in, which then cuts it down to two at large spots. I can't see two teams from the Big East or ACC making the BCS. And with Oregon losing it's going to be tough for the Pac-10 to get two teams in the BCS. So right now: Arizona State, Kansas/Missouri/Oklahoma, and Illinois fighting for those last two spots. I can't see a situation where the Big 12 doesn't get two teams in... so really it's down to Arizona State and Illinois (and maybe Virgina Tech/BC loser) fighting for that last spot. I guess Arizona State gets the nod over Illinois since they only have two losses to Illinois three and the Fiesta Bowl would take them before Illinois - but man oh man, is this crazy or what? Notre Dame picked a bad year to stink since all they had to do was be okay to make the BCS - seriously, an 8-4 ND team would be BCSing this year.

BCS Prediction:
Ohio State vs Georgia
At this point why not?

Why Georgia... check this out -- Georgia will finish 10-2 and third in the SEC. Right now they're 7th in the BCS. They'll pass Arizona State and I also think they'll pass LSU and the loser of the Missouri/Kansas game. That would put them in 4th place in the BCS. Let's say the winner of the Missouri/Kansas game loses to Oklahoma next week AND West Virginia trips up... AND Tennessee beats LSU next week. Wouldn't that put Georgia in the BCS Championship? What a crazy and amazing college football season.

Poor Bill Simmons

2007-11-09T20:58:00.001-06:00

Good Lord I feel bad for Bill Simmons. After reading this "We wish we were Jay Marriotti" entry from Kissing Suzy Kolber we really feel for the guy. He's getting blasted just because he was born in New England. All the guy did was grow up in Boston/New England, root for those Boston teams, cheer for them, give his heart and soul for those teams. Now, everyone wants to rip him because he's a Boston fan.

Since he's a pretty good writer, Simmons got a break and then got lucky when ESPN.com picked him up.

Six years after ESPN picks him up, three Boston teams are really, really good. And this pisses everyone off, and everyone takes it out on him because he roots for those teams. Either we have completely forgotten what the point of the Sports Guy was, to write from the prespective of a fan, or we're just really jealous (and petty) that we aren't from Boston right now.

Is it Bill's fault that the entire Red Sox Nation bullshit thing is out of control? Is it his fault that millions of rich white kids who grew up in subdivisions and never went to baseball games thus never having a team became Red Sox fans in college because it was 'cool' - just like doing E and Eminem once was? Is it Simmons' fault that Tom Brady and probably that entire line backing corps probably injects HGH and that the Pats head coach may be the most unlikable American that doesn't live on Mass Ave in Northwest DC? Is it Bill's fault that the Celtics got KG because the Bulls were to fucking scared too trade away Gordon AND Deng?

Was Simmons' column today outrageous? Yes. But he’s a Boston fan, he’s suppose to feel that way. He is suppose to feel that the refs are screwing over his team. As fans, we all feel this way. Just like I thought the Bears were getting hosed by the refs in the Eagles game and the fact that it came down to a 97 yard drive was and still is ridiculous in my mind (The Bears should have won by 17 points if the refs were even half way decent in that game). And how Josh Paul did drop that third strike in Game 2 of the 2005 ALCS. This may be viewed as an outrageous claim. I am fully aware of that - but I still think the Bears got screwed and that AJ was totally doing the right thing.

But let’s not forget, if you watched the Pats/Colts game the refs were brutal. Those two pass interference calls on the Pats early in the game were totally made up. And that Faulk play was a mugging. Does that make up for the 2002 Super Bowl when the refs let the Pats get away with mugging the Rams? No. But it was a poorly refereed game.

If it was John Clayton or Gary Smith or Sal Paolantonio writing what Simmons’ wrote then I’d have a problem. But he’s just a Boston fan. And if he was from Chicago, I'd enjoy the guy even more than I do now (assuming that he wasn't a Cubs fan).

And if he was from Philly they'd love him… wait forget that, they’d boo the shit out of him and then cry about how they should have the best sport writers* of all time but bad luck took him away.

And remember, it's a free Internets column. Not reading it is always an option. I stopped reading it half way though.

* not sportswriter/jorunalist

Niner Pickers

2007-11-02T13:20:00.000-05:00

Picks… because we’re bored.

BILLS (+1) over Bengals
If the Bills were in the NFC the good people of Buffalo could be buying playoff tickets.

Broncos (+3) over LIONS
Ugh… I the Broncos are just good enough to lose. Meanwhile the Lions are a pretty pitiful team. In fact, they might be the poster child of the quality of the 2007 season. They’re 5-2 and maybe looked impressive in one of those wins.

TITANS (-4) over Panthers
Then again, the Titans seem like they’ll be the team that goes 10-6 but 4-12 against the spread.

CHIEFS (-2) over Packers
KC at home… KC at home… How many bad interceptions does Favre throw this game? Three? Four?

Chargers (-7) over VIKINGS
It’s going to be hard for the Chargers to get a bye at this point, but they are setting themselves up to peak at just the right time. The week before they play the Pats or Colts.

Niners (+3.5) over FALCONS
Hey look, it’s the third game, already!, on the schedule that you won’t catch me watching!

SAINTS (-3) over Jags
In this crazy NFC world that we live in, the Saints are suddenly not only back in a divisional race, but who’s to say they couldn’t go to the Super Bowl? Other than some talking heads, who’s to say they can’t? Who? Who? Who? Oh, and since it was the NFL, yet another positive ‘roid test this week. This time it was Marcus Stroud on the Jags. Yet that barely made ESPN’s front page. Meanwhile, Mike Cameroon apparently hangs out with Mike Vick.

Redskins (-3.5) over JETS
The Jets suck.

Cardinals (+3.5) over BUCS
The forth game that we won’t be watching.

BROWNS (-1) over Seahawks
Seriously, the crisis in the NFC is nearing White House action. It wouldn’t shock me if the winners of the NFC West and South had 8-8 records.

COLTS (+5.5) over Patriots
In the grand scheme of things, this really isn’t that big of a game. But it’s nice to know that they’re playing it in Indy for the first time in like six years. Since this is the only game that really matters this week, a few more thoughts:
- We’re thoroughly enjoying the Patriots running up the score.
- The Pats D hasn't played all that great this year. Just a thought.
- What has gotten into Tom Brady? Does he want to go down as the greatest Quarterback of all time or something? We admitted before the season started that Peyton was the greatest of all time. Peyton had won the Super Bowl. And sure, while his playoff record and stats are nothing to write home about; the way Manning dominates a game, from his vision to his pre-snap bullshit, no one we’ve seen is like him. (fyi: Manning has the lowest QB rating for a Super Bowl winner or maybe it was for a QB Super Bowl MVP… no matter it’s like 65). But no Tom Brady seems set on throwing as many touchdowns as Barry Bonds had taters in a season.
- Why don’t the Colts get more love? Because they only win by 20? Weird. And if they win, everyone and their mother will crown them the greatest team of all time.
- One of these two teams will not make it back to the AFC Championship game. So enjoy this one.

Texans (+3) over RAIDERS
Five games no one wants to see.

Cowboys (-3) over EAGLES
If you’re Andy Reid are you relieved that your kids are going to jail? Is there a reason Andy Reid didn’t resign as coach a year ago? Two years ago? Did he not know about his kids being junkies? Did he put football in front of family? I mean there are like a million questions to this entire situation aren’t there? And while we’re asking questions, after last weekend I think McNabb is right about those black QB stuff. If Donny was the one getting lap dances from Britney, would there be any doubt that he’d be getting killed by ever single media member in the world?

Ravens (+9) over STEELERS
The over/under is 36… so apparently the Steelers are suppose to win 24-10 or 24-13. I’ll take the points.

Season:
61-55

The Hater on Maher

2007-10-22T20:19:00.000-05:00

We can't stand the blowhard that is Bill "Glib" Maher because he's part of the problem, even though he's either too stupid to realize it or he sold he soul for the sake of his ego. Maher is just as bad as the Bill O'Reilly or Rush's of the world since he goes on TV and attacks people who he doesn't agree with - thus giving him blowhard status. Instead of dialogue it's all about Maher's 'correct' and extremely limited point of view. It's people like Maher that hurt his cause (either the Truth or liberal American point of views) without even realizing it.

Anyway, the Hater is right, this is almost too perfect to not be staged.

Mossberg is right, free the phone. It's crazy that we're held hostage by the contracts and 'rites' that the telecoms companies hold. It'd be one thing if AT&T was the one who invented and patent the iPhone for example, but they didn't. So what right should they have over the use of the iPhone (and Apple isn't innocent either here since Apple does attempt to limit users of Apple products to only Apple's software).

We know that our little blog has gone though a few tough months, but boy-oh-boy, what about Deadspin? It sucks now. The new format (well new in that it's a few months old) stuck a fork in the site for us. While the quality of posts have been so-so for a while, there would be a gem here and there. But with the new format making it nearly impossible to read, why even bother? The comments section is filled with all those people you hear old people bitching about when they say younger generations suck. Thankfully, The Big Lead has stepped it up, actually talking about you know, sports, without the "look at how funny we are at writing without actually trying to be funny! It's natural we swear!" style of writing. The rise and fall of Deadspin should be a book in about three years.

(We should note, we have been linked on Deadspin a few times and we are thankful for that).

Soulja Boy up in it (OH!)
Watch Me Crank It
Watch Me Roll
Watch Me Crank Dat Soulja Boy,
that Super Man Dat (OH!)
Now Watch Me Do
(Crank Dat Soulja )

For Shits, and Giggles!

2007-10-21T10:01:00.000-05:00

Since everyone else does an NFL picks post and we’ve done it in the past… why figured, why not do a NFL picks post? And here we are. Sorry if you’re yawning already.

Vikings (+9.5) over COWBOYS
Adrian Peterson, aka the 2nd pick of next years fantasy drafts, may have had the best game I’ve ever seen an NFL running back have. My Lord this kid is good. I saw a highlight of him two weeks ago and was impressed, but after watching him for 60 minutes, I’m in love. The kid is going places.

On that note, are the Cowboys really the best team in the NFC? And why isn’t anyone else talking about the Vikings? They can run the ball and stop the ball. Yes, I know their QB is Tavaris Jackson, or at least I think it is, but they can control the line which is like 70% of an NFL game.

BILLS (+3) over Ravens
I don’t think the Bills are that good, but the Ravens can’t score points. I’ll take the three.

LIONS (-2) over Bucs
The Lions are the closest thing we have to a college team in the NFL right now. They sort of play defense, they can throw the ball, they won’t win on the road but they’ll play you tough, and they’re going to win most games at home. As for the Bucs… I have nothing good or bad to say about them.

DOLPHINS (+16.5) over Patriots
I know the Patriots are beating everyone by 20 points. But I’m going to take the Fins for one reason: they’re at home playing a divisional opponent. Even after the Pats win by 21 points, I’m not going to feel bad about picking this game.

Falcons (+9) over SAINTS
Wait the Saints win one game in Seattle and all of a sudden they’re giving 9 points? Too many points… yuck. Bad game. Don’t bet this game unless you know something I don’t.

GIANTS (-9) over Niners
Personally, I think the Giants stink. But apparently, the 49ers stink more. But seriously, how are the Giants this good?

REDSKINS (-9) over Cardinals
Redskins at home and the Cardinals are without a QB.

TEXANS (+1) over Titans
I’m assuming Vince Young isn’t playing. Note: The Texans aren’t that good, yet some how they’re going to be in this playoff race. The 2007 NFL Season! Where Bad means Good!

BENGALS (-6) over Jets
The Jets stink. The Bengals aren’t very good. I could see this being a big fantasy day for a few guys on the Bengals… if only because I can’t see the Jets scoring 20 points, so I’ll go with the Bengals.

Chiefs (+3) over RAIDERS
You’re guess is as good as mine… but the Chiefs are in first place in the AFC West! The Chiefs!

SEAHAWKS (-8) over Rams
The last few minutes against the Saints last week, the Seahawks ran the worst late game drill ever. Hasselbeck was throwing the ball up for grabs. They weren’t rushing to the line, using time outs, calling weird plays. It was easily the most bizarre thing I’ve ever seen in my life, which was topped off by them going for it on 4th down losing by 10 points instead of kicking the field goal. Yet, a week later I’m taking them against the Rams. My Lord the NFL stinks.

Bears (+5) over EAGLES
The Eagles almost lost to the Jets. Andy Reid will throw the ball. Meanwhile, the Bears don’t have anyone who can play safety. So you know what… this game could go either way. Maybe I still think the 2006 Bears will sort of show up one of these weeks, you know the team which was good for a bomb, a return by Hester, and the D making five or six plays. Right now, they’ve got the bombs, they’ve got the returns from Hester, but the D has done shit. I’d love to see Andy Reid tell McNabb to put the ball up in the air 45 or 50 times.

Steelers (-3.5) over BRONCOS
This is more a “what happened to the Broncos” pick than a “wow, the Steelers look great” pick.

Indians over RED SOX
The Baseball Gods hate TV ratings. I know Paul Byrd just got busted for HGH, but you know what, the Red Sox break hearts. This is what they do best. 2004 was the exception to the rule. And now, as a country is forced to suffer though millions and millions of white people wearing faux worn Boston hats, to go along the green and pink hats, every white male who has strong allegiances to a baseball team and every minority is rooting for the Indians today. Sure it’s only 40% of America, but we’re vocals.

JAGUARS (+3) over Colts
I’ll take the home dog in divisional games almost every time. And this is another one of those times. And can we just make it official: Peyton Manning is the best QB in NFL history.

SEASON: 45 - 44
This is using ESPN's pick 'em game, which is totally flawed. But it's all we've got right now (and by the way, that puts us in the 83 percentile).

Sqeezin' Red Sox Style

2007-10-13T21:02:00.000-05:00

CC Sabathia had a walks per nine innings of 1.38 -walking 37 batters in the entire 2007 regular season – and posted an impressive 5.65 strike out to walk ratio. Sabathia’s season high for walks in a game was three, which he only did twice.

This year Fausto Carmona had a walks per nine innings average of 2.55 – he walked 61 batters this year – posting a K/BB ratio of 2.25. Carmona was more up and down with his control, he walked four batters or more four times this year.

I’m currently watching Game Two of the ALCS and maybe it’s me, but there seems to be an awful lot of balls. The 3rd inning isn’t even over and Carmona has already walked four batters. Last night, Sabathia walked five batters – two more than he had in any game this season. In Game One of the ALDS against the Yankees, Sabathia walked six batters. (It should be noted that in Game Two of the ALDS, Carmona walked two batters).

My point in all this is that it has long been speculated (by whom other than fans, I’m not sure) that the Red Sox and Yankees have smaller strike zones. And in watching these games, it appears that this is true. If batters on the Red Sox or Yankees don’t swing, rarely is the pitch called a strike.

Now, you could argue that the Red Sox and Yankees preach this approach and look for and sign players who have good eyes. The Red Sox, after all, lead the majors in walks this year and the Yankees were 4th. The Oakland A’s, another team that preaches patience at the plate, were second in walks in the majors.

There is no doubt that the Yankees and Red Sox have players who have fantastic batting eyes. But why does it seem that pitchers like Sabathia, who have such great control in 34 starts in the regular season, become Daniel Cabrera against the Red Sox and Yankees (then again maybe Cabrera leads the league in walks because he gets squeezed in 20% of his starts?). Seems to me that opposing pitchers have a teacup-sized strike zone against Boston and New York – and this goes a long way to their success (or in the Yankees' case - only in the regular season).

We’ll be looking for some data or evidence to back up our hypothesis.

And loved this shot that Phil Rogers at the Tribune took at Schilling:

Curt Schilling moves ahead of Daisuke Matsuzaka in the Red Sox rotation-commentary both on how badly Schilling wanted the Fenway Park stage again and how Matsuzaka has disappointed.

Is there any doubt that Schilling refers to himself in the third person when the reporters aren’t around? I hope he breaks a leg on Saturday.

Why the NFL Stinks Right Now

2007-10-12T19:57:00.000-05:00

We were speaking with D the other day when he asked about the demise of VFLOAB. I told him that we hadn’t had much free time (true, neglecting to tell him that writing in 90 degree weather has never been our cup of tea). But I casually mentioned that a post ripping the NFL was due up sooner rather than later. D responded “What?!?! This year has been great!” and for a few hours I thought maybe I was missing something. Even my defense and reasoning as to why the NFL sucked was half assed and half hearted.

But in reading Simmons’ picks today, I was reminded why the NFL sucks this year – EVERYONE IN THE NFL STINKS! Okay, the New England Patriots look really, really good. And the Colts have Peyton Manning… but after that? Bueller?… Bueller?… Bueller?…

Looking at Simmons’ power poll he has Tennessee and Jacksonville ranked fifth and sixth respectively and you know what… I didn’t jump out of my chair thinking that Bill had lost it. In fact, I shrugged and said to myself, “He’s probably right.” And that’s it.

I mean seriously, as Bill would go on to point out:
“(Intriguing subplot for this game: If the Bengals lose, I'm moving them into the Bruce Coslet Division of next week's Power Poll, only I'm keeping the Chiefs in there no matter what happens because they stink. If Cleveland loses at home to Miami and the Jets lose at home to Philly, unless Atlanta can somehow win on Monday night, that means an astonishing 11 teams will appear in the Coslet Division for Week 7. In other words, more than one-third of the league would fall into the "completely sucks" category. Amazing. But please, let's expand and add a 33rd team. That's a great idea.)”

That’s right 11 teams (according to Simmons) in the NFL out right stink. In baseball I count 8 or 9 teams that flat out stink (depending on where you stand with Houston (and the entire National League)). In the NFL? You have St. Louis, Miami, New Orleans, Kansas City, San Francisco, Minnesota, Atlanta, Buffalo, New York Jets – 9 right there; and I’ll add Cleveland, Houston, Oakland, and Carolina to that list. Now we’re up to 13… and Simmons has Denver in the stink area and Cincinnati not far behind and I’ll be honest with you, Philly and Detroit (a healthy Bears D destroys that Lions team two weeks ago) aren’t far off either. All told, we may have 17 teams that aren’t good! Seventeen teams! That’s over half the league! And let’s not forget Arizona and the New York Giants who might not be that good… it’s just that they’re not that bad.

It’s sad to say, but the NFL today isn’t about being good, it’s about not being as bad. This is why no one should have been surprised when the Packers started 4-0 or the Redskins suddenly are 3-1… or that Tennessee with no wide receivers and average running backs are arguably the 5th best team in the NFL!

(In fact, look at the number of teams who have a good shot at the playoffs and shit receivers: Tennessee, Jacksonville, San Diego, Seattle, and the Chicago Bears. Amazing).

As I have pointed out in passing, the way the NFL does it’s scheduling, where all the 4th place teams play all the other 4th place teams, suddenly getting ‘good’ in the NFL isn’t all that difficult. If you’re slightly better than those other 4th place teams, suddenly you’ve got 4 wins. If you can find five more wins in your remaining 12 games (not that difficult considering divisional games and home field advantage)… you are a playoff team. Look at the Jets last year. They played the 4th place schedule, made the playoffs, and now, suck with a 2nd place schedule, they’re staring a 6-10 season in the face. Meanwhile, the Redskins, Houston, Oakland, Tampa Bay, and Arizona, all facing 4th place schedules, suddenly look like playoff teams.

It’s complete and utter bullshit. And a really lame way for the NFL to create competition. Just imagine if next year the Red Sox, Indians, Yankees, and Angels faced each other 50 times, while the White Sox got to beat up on the Royals, Rangers, and Devil Rays (this assumes of course the White Sox make a few moves to not suck as much in 2008)? Wouldn’t the 2008 playoffs look something like the White Sox, Red Sox, Angels, and some one else (say the Blue Jays)?

In effect this is what the NFL has done with their schedule. They’ve rigged it so that bad teams face each other – thus a bad team that is slightly better will win those games. Meanwhile the good teams face each other – and the good teams that are slightly worse suddenly lose a few more games than normal. All of a sudden we have pretenders in the playoffs and fake competition and ‘races’.

At least the cream is able and usually does rise to the top (I’m looking at you 2001 Patriots and 2005 Steelers).

We wanted to wait a full month...

2007-10-11T18:48:00.000-05:00

...But John Hollinger's preview of the New York Knicks is just too good to be true. My Lord this is too much fun to read. We here at VFLOAB are here to give you the best:

"More weirdness enveloped the team as the season went on. Steve Francis was ready to be bought out with an alleged bad knee, one that magically healed once Jamal Crawford was pronounced out for the season."

Honestly, we just like the idea of Steve Francis acting all pissy and faking injury, then hearing the news about Crawford, and suddenly he's running full speed throwing up threes from mid-court.

"Channing Frye regressed badly from a promising rookie season while his backup, David Lee, exploded onto the scene to be the Knicks' most effective player; yet Thomas never appeared to consider changing the lineup."

Classic Isiah there - you know what, I'll sit the better player.

"And behind the scenes, a sexual harassment lawsuit against Thomas and the Knicks caused continued embarrassment that lasted through the offseason."

This case led me to asking my girlfriend one night if she ever worked for MSG. Thankfully the answer was no. Good times.

"But the one that took the cake was the contract extension team owner James Dolan proudly announced for Thomas -- a reward for leading the Knicks to a 28-35 record through 63 games. Apparently Dolan was beaming because New York momentarily had possession of the eighth spot in the Eastern Conference playoff race; the fact that the Knicks were seven games under .500 with the league's highest payroll didn't appear to be on his radar."

For a second, imagine you root for the Knicks AND Notre Dame? You're locked into Isiah and Charlie Weis for at least three more years!

"Then there were the early-season buyouts for Maurice Taylor and Jalen Rose. Though neither player had value on the court, their expiring contracts could have been used to acquire Allen Iverson or Pau Gasol later in the year. Instead they were set free early on for reasons that never have been made clear."

What's great about the Rose deal is that this only gets better!

"So in the end Thomas never used Rose, after trading for him in the middle of 2005-06 and getting a first-round pick from the Raptors. Factoring in Rose's salary and the luxury tax, Thomas paid close to $30 million for the 21st pick in the first round; the going rate for picks in that range is $3 million. Leave it to the Knicks to pay 10 times the market value for an asset."

That's right, by buying out Rose a year ago, the Knicks paid $30 million dollars for the 21st pick in the draft AND weren't able to trade for two players who might actually have helped them! And even more frustrating is that we all missed the chance to see Marberry, Francis, AND Iverson on the same team and on the court at the same time (and let's not forget the black hole that his Eddy Curry). I just shed a tear thinking about that missed oppertunity.

"However, New York's wagon is still too full. By rule the Knicks can only keep 15 players, but they have 17 guaranteed contracts."

Seriously, how is this even possible? What in the world is Isiah doing - let alone thinking. Does he think that tomorrow David Stern is going to change the rules and allow all NBA teams not only to carry 17 guys but also play six players at the same time?

"Pardon me while I digress, but this [player's strengths replicate each other] is a major problem up and down the Knicks' roster. Isiah's eye for talent only seems to include three types of players -- shoot-first guards who don't defend, athletic small forwards who can't shoot, and huge, lumbering post players."

Ha! No one has better explained Isiah's reasoning better. I love what Hollinger wrote there - classic. Shoot first guards, athletic players who can't shoot, and post players who can't defend... ha.

Hollinger raps up the piece, sadly, in not nearly as an entertaining fasion, but hey, can't beat the beginning of this review of the Knicks. And with that, we can't wait for the NBA season.

An Uninteresting Season

2007-09-13T00:10:00.000-05:00

Since this is the most inconsistent and uninteresting baseball season since probably 2000, but first let’s just forget that the White Sox have to be the worst team in the majors right now (they started four minor leaguers and featured a bunch of pitchers who sucked yesterday) – it really hasn’t been that interesting of a season. The first three months almost played out exactly as they were suppose too. Sure the Yankees struggled a bit but they aren’t that good anyway, the White Sox were worse than anyone thought, and Seattle surprised us all. But other than that April, May, June, and even July were eerily blah. Then August hits and baseball goes nuts were every race becomes insane and suddenly the Tigers stink and the Diamondbacks are in first place. Now it’s September and the only interesting race is, ummm, none of them. The NL Central is like watching two kids eat too much at a ball game and then seeing who can throw up the most on the car ride home. Not enjoyable.

The AL East, Central, and West races are all over. The NL East race was interesting for about three days but then the Phillies did what the Phillies do… make things just interesting enough only to let us all down. Seriously, is there an analogy or metaphor that can be made about the Phillies over the last five to six years? Are they like that girl who is cute but only wears a one piece? Nah… are they like that guy who gets drunk only once in a blue moon, is a great time, but never drinks? Seriously, help me. I’ve got nothing.

That leaves us with the NL West race, which, let’s face it, is so bizarre that it doesn’t even make sense. To anyone. Can someone, anyone, stathead, Rob Neyer, Tuesday Morning Blowhard, the Neo-Cons, Obama, scouts, anyone, tell me how the hell the Diamondbacks are 18 games over .500 with a negative 30 run differential? Search these Internets… all you’ll get is people going, ‘well, umm, they win?’ No one can explain this. Scouts will tell you that they’re not that talented. They are an average pitching team and bellow average hitting team… I mean it’s just totally weird. Statheads have just said ‘fuck it’ since there is nothing in the world of statistics that can possibly explain their success.

Meanwhile, the Yankees decided to go something like 40-19 since the All-Star Break and basically put themselves in the playoffs. The Onion summed that one up perfectly. The good news is that we call all bet against them when they play the Angels in the ALDS and make lots of money. Thanks to the Tigers for sucking it big time and leaving us with the Yankees. As I said back in July, the Yankees had to play .700 baseball and have the Tigers or Indians do in the toilet. Cue Yankee fucking luck, miracle, whatever it is they have that is so friggin’ annoying.

I guess there is hope, the Yankees have been playing out of their mind for two months ago… that leads to VFLOAB’s Grady Sizemore Theory:
Baseball teams playing out of their mind will only play out of their mind for two months, after which, they will revert to the mean and struggle to play about .500 baseball.

Don’t believe me? Think back to 2005. The White Sox played out of their minds to start the year. Then after the All-Star Break they played about .500 baseball. Beginning in late July the Indians started to play well, and then in September, they won something like 19 out of 20 games at one point. The Sox, who had a 15 game lead at one point, were only up 2 or 3 games going into the last week of the year. Then Grady Sizemore lost a ball in the sun in KC and the Indians lost something like five of their last six – failed to catch the White Sox and blowing the Wild Card in the process.

This year… well first we had the Red Sox playing out of their minds. Then in the middle of the year we had the Cubs. And now? The Yankees. If we were talking about any other team in the majors, I’d say don’t be shocked if they get cold in the next week or so and choke away the Wild Card. But they’re the Yankees. That’s not going to happen. But we can hope.

(NOTE: We are rooting for the Yankees to catch the Red Sox for comedic purposes).

And yes, I realize that the 2006 Tigers disproved the Grady Sizermore Theory in that they played out of their mind for four months. But remember, even they blew the division in the end.

This was originally going to be about the NFL, but since we’re at 800 words, we’ll hit up the NFL later.

PEACE OUT

Bearforce 1

2007-09-06T16:08:00.000-05:00

I think the best part is when they jump backwards into the pool.

BTW, when youtube is funnier than Saturday Night Live 98% of the time, does that means it's time to at least try something new on SNL?

A Minute By Minute Night

2007-09-01T16:19:00.000-05:00

About three or four nights a year, you get the Perfect Sports TV Viewing Night Storm, and last Thursday, was one of those nights:
- White Sox/Texas (yes, I actually do tune into Sox game stills even though it is in no way enjoyable).
- Bears/Browns - BRADY!
- Cubs/Brewers - PRINCE!
- LSU/Mississippi State - Five First Round Draft Picks waiting to Happen!
- USA/Maradona, I mean Argentina - Has anyone's stock risen more this summer than Kobe? Seriously... have you seen him for the US over the last two weeks?
- Fox Soccer Channel - Easily the greatest TV station ever.

So with all this on the slate, I went to work:

6:59pm – As we put the final touches on a gin gimlet (Tanqueray) and the Stones singing about death (“You can’t Always Get What You Want” which we didn’t even know was about death until like two years ago) – we’re starting with college football where Sylvester Croom is being show speaking yesterday to the Mississippi State faithful. Quick, name either:
a) A Mississippi State faithful
b) A famous Mississippi State alum

7:04 – Whoa! Miss Mississippi is introducing the MSU team on ESPN in a sweet southern drawl and giving her analysis of the team. Does ABC have Miss America this year? And now James Carville who is clearly reading off of cards, gives us the LSU team! This is almost as cool as when the players introducing themselves on Monday Night Football… THE Ohio State University. I’m praying for someone form CUA to make the NFL and say THE Catholic University of America.

7:11 – Famous MSU alums: John Grisham, MSNBC’s chief meteorologist Sean McLaughlin, the dude who founded the never heard of Pizza Inn, and roughly 183 professional baseball and football players. Once again, you’ve gotta love the SEC, academics be damned (save Vandy).

7:13 – What, no MLS game? Brewers already up 1-0 on the Cubs in the top of the first… it looks like Ted Lilly is going to make this a long night on the North Side… so sad. Wait, the US Open is on TV too? Is another more underrated than tennis – Sharapova! – I mean, it’s one of those things that just sort of sucks you in. Matches seem like they take forever, but they actually move really quickly. Tennis is the anti-golf.

7:17 – Seriously, there aren’t enough TV buttons… I just remember the Bears game and feel like I should watch this because in a half hour it’s pointless to check it out. But there’s a Necaxa/Chiapas Mexican Football match to be watched also!

7:19 – The WNBA playoffs are on ESPN Classic. Does this shatter the Unintentional Comedy Scale? And apparently I don’t have the Big Ten channel. When does that launch? Oh today?

7:22 – I just realized that even though we’re only 6 minutes into the Bears/Browns game, Grossman is on the bench. And wouldn’t you know it, Griese pulls a SexCannon on third down saying, “Fuck it, I’m going deep.”

7:28 – This Bears/Browns game couldn’t be more unexciting. Wouldn’t the NFL be 100 times more exciting if play was continues and only punt returns?

7:32 – So I’m not getting the Big Ten Network even though I’m paying for the Sports Extra package on Comcast. Hey Comcast, you suck… so much. I understand (and don’t agree) with your argument that consumers shouldn’t be forced to receive the BigTen Network and if they want it they should pay extra, but guess what I am paying extra alreay. So why can’t I get it?

7:40 – Switched over to the Sox game, and Thome just killed an offering from Millwood, and it’s 1-0 White Sox. Holy shit he killed that one and that is Jim Thome’s 495th career home run.

8:10 – Some time while starting dinner, Sammy Sosa hits a home run and in classic Hawk call ensues, “There’s a drive deep. Stay in here. [A good five seconds of silence] And it’s a 1-1 ball game.” Meanwhile, as Sosa is rounding the bases, the Texas PA is blaring “The Natural” theme music. As if I needed to dislike the Rangers and Texas even more.

8:14 – Let’s just say this night isn’t going to plan. I think focusing on the two baseball games is hurting… let’s try LSU/MSU and the US Open. And more booze. Surprisingly, it’s only 10-0 LSU in the second and it’s raining in Mississippi! What was I thinking going to the Cubs game and their boring ass announcers (Len Kasper and World Series Manager Bob Brenly).

8:35 – As I start eating dinner, I flip over to the Sox game after LSU scores a TD on the final play of the first half. I apparently just missed a four error inning by the White Sox – and Hawk isn’t pissed or dead.

8:39 - Hawk is talking about a three error inning he once had – apparently he made three errors and then forgot to cover the first base on top if it, all in the same inning. DJ tells him that he’s never seen that. Hawk then shoots back, “When you make three errors in an inning, you’re mind goes places.” And hasn’t said a word since – a good minute has passed – I picture Hawk making the ‘cut throat’ jester to DJ right now since DJ just gave his nervous laugh. The inning ends and Hawk has sit not said a word to DJ. See there is a silver lining to the Sox sucking.

8:44 – Hawk speaks! Hawk is speaking as if he’s some sort of baseball elder in this really forced, calm, wise voice – musing on the finer points of pitching and bad luck.

8:47 – It’s officially NFL season, my first Peyton Manning commercial! It’s that one where he audible to me to order the NFL Season Ticket. But as you know, I can’t since I have Comcast! No matter, it’s good to get that Peyton commercial out of the way – he really does give hope to squares everywhere doesn’t he?

8:49 – The Shins and Snoop Dogg are playing a show together? What? BTW, only during a Cubs game on WGN would such information be broad casted. Cubs games on WGN… well just watch one some time to fully understand the Three Hour Infomercial that it is. Oh yeah, if things don’t pick up, I might pop in the Netflix DVD I got today and then come back for KOBE and USA vs Maradona, I mean, Argentina.

8:52 – I’ll say this, WGN knows their audience – senior citizens and people from downstate Illinois and Iowa. After showing the Batman camera crew (yes, Chicago is Gotham) we had this gem: “I thought I saw the Batmobile in the parking lot tonight. I just thought one of the players went a little overboard, but I guess I was off,” Bob Brenly.

8:55 – YES! It’s the Gillette commercial with Thierry Henry! The coolest man alive! But who okayed that commercial for US audiences? Tiger Woods, Roger Federer, and Henry? Was Shane Warne not available?

9:02 – Why hasn’t the media and bloggers made more noise about the awesomeness that is the tennis shot tracker thingie where players can challenge the official ruling by going to that shot tracker thingie (which is like the coolest thing in sports) and then the get the call right. Why can’t we do that with all sports? I mean, if we can track where a 100 mph tennis ball lands, why do NFL officials spend two minutes figuring out if a ball hit the ground or not? Why does every baseball fan have to suffer from the consistently smaller strike zones that the Red Sox and Yankees get?

9:06 – What does it mean when more blacks are in the crowd at a US Open tennis match than a Red Sox game at Fenway? Rhetorical Question #289,922,188 – is there such a thing as a black Red Sox fan? Is Red Sox Nation a White Only thing?

9:15 – Blake is in a battle in Queens against some French guy named Santoro. But I’m going to but on the Constant Gardener.

12:12 – Well the Constant Gardener makes you think twice about spending any time what’s so ever watching sports… who cares about sports while the situation in Sudan continues? A situation were thousands are being killed and the West is slow to react (and I fully realize that the movie wasn’t really focused on Sudan, but I don’t feel like going into the whole exploitation of Africa by pharmaceutical companies). Anyway, the US is up 22 on Argentina in the second half.

12:19 – As Walton talks about how great it is to see a soccer game in Argentina (warning to all gringos who take Walton’s advice, don’t go to a game). Anyway, Walton drops Maradona’s name! And with that, we’re going to call it a night. We’ve got to finish packing as it is (Watch out Jersey shore, I’m comin’!) and it’s getting late. And this post… well like any solid night of drinking, it was a good idea at the time.

Another Day in the Dog Days

2007-08-28T22:05:00.000-05:00

Thoughts while realizing that in four days sports become totally awesome:

- Oasis never made it too big here in the States, but that’s because we’ve always had drinking bands. Can I be the first to say that Oasis is the first great British drinking band? Seriously, Oasis is a 100 times more fun when half or fully drunk. Seriously, singing “Don’t Look Back In Anger” drunk in a Pub is about as good as it gets.

- Admit it, you’re probably more pumped about fantasy football than the NFL aren’t you?

- Netflix – Awesome

- If you came here looking for an explanation as to why the Fed seemingly bailed out Wall Street last week… I haven’t a clue. As the Economist pointed out, if the reason was because of banks, then we can sort of understand the rate cut:
Banks became wary of lending to each other. The outcome was frighteningly similar to a bank run, but one that affected the entire wholesale money market.

But if the cut was just to prop up the market… well there are two major problems with that.
1) Wall Street, the DOW-JONES Industrial Average and SP 500 are not the American economy. They are indicators, and imperfect indicators at that, of the US economy.

2) The Fed attempted to bail out investors (the DOW has been down about 200 on the week). As the New Yorker pointed out, it creates a moral hazard problem:
The Fed’s decision to flood the system with cheap money will create a textbook case of what’s usually called moral hazard: insulating fund managers from the consequences of their errors will encourage similarly risky bets in the future.
Basically, investors who either invested stupidly or over exposed themselves to the sub prime mortgage market are being ‘awarded’ for their stupidity. The Fed is, in effect, saying to those investors, “It’s okay to be foolish, and we’ll bail you out.” This of course is bad on a bunch of different levels. It protects stupid wealthy people, stupid get rich people, and greedy hedge funds/equity firms.

What does this mean for 95% of America? If you own stocks or have a 401(k), it's good. But if you aren't planing on selling those shares any time soon... it doesn't affect you at all. What will hurt, is that with money now cheaper, inflation, which already was a bit of a problem, will become a bit more problematic. Yep, high foot prices. And not as much as a relief from those high summer gas prices in the next few months. In other words, the Fed made your life a little more expensive.

- Rhetorical Question #289,922,187 – Why are the White Sox carrying 13 pitchers?

- If nothing else, this piece on France, Europe, and Sarkozy is very interesting.

- Shouldn’t the anti-Union, GOP folks work on the first Monday of September? I mean aren’t they against workers? So isn’t it hypocritical for them to take the ‘working man’s holiday’ off?

- Alberto Gonzales… we, America and the free world, won’t miss you. Don’t let that door hit you on the way out.

Rove Says Good-Bye

2007-08-24T11:16:00.000-05:00

Karl Rove was lucky. I think everyone can agree to that.

But now it comes down to two cliches about luck:
- Is it better to be lucky than good
OR
- You create your own luck?

Where does Rove's career fall if we look at those two clinches?

Take a step back and look at Rove's mythical status inside the Beltway. The Democrats, because he won elections, viewed Rove as the the problem, as some sort of asshole who was attempting to destroy America.

It's fairly obvious that the Democrats, or more specifically, Progressives/Liberals feared Rove more than they should have. And what they feared was that Rove was doing things (organizing) that they should have been doing. But liberals are very good at talking about what needs to be done. Often times they wish/hope/pray for someone to actually do it. And that was Rove's greatest success - he actually did the grunt work, the boring work of organizing. He was a man of action - and that's what people feared.

But Rove was never the Evil Genius behind Bush - that's Dick Cheney. Rove, rather, was on the Bush bandwagon far before Cheney. Rove's job was then and always was to get Bush elected. And he did just that.

Or did he? The 2000 election is the outlier when it comes to elections. Rove's 'victory' is thanks in part to about 100 different factors breaking his/Bush's way:
- Clinton's blowjob
- Clinton lying about a blowjob
- Al Gore being pre-2002 Al Gore
- Al Gore forgetting about the economy
- Al Gore deciding not to use Clinton to his advantage
- Peace
- Janet Reno sending men to get Elian Gonzalez (easily the most overlooked factor of the 2000 election).
- Poor design of ballots in Palm Beach
- Ralph Nader
- The Electoral College

I mean the list goes on and on and on... if one of those factors, just one, goes the other way, Gore's president and Karl Rove is a nobody.

But Rove deserves credit for make the election of 2000 close in the first place. Sure he was aided by missteps by Gore and company and Bush won because, let's face it, a technicality. But the 2000 election shouldn't have been close in the first place - Al Gore, like the 1978 Red Sox or the 1962 Phillies, choked. And Rove ceased the opportunity.

The 2004 election is different. On one hand, Rove was dealt a great hand - another poor candidate from the Democrats and Bush's 'leadership' after 9/11 and the War on Terror. But at the same time, he had to deal with the Iraq War and the inability of the US military capturing bin Laden (remember, as Bush likes to claim, he is the Commander and Chief, so the failure to catch bin Laden, still to this day, lays on Bush's lap - but the Buck Never Stops Here with Bush, does it?). Yet Rove maneuvered around all this and was able to get Bush reelected, not because of gay marriage as most on the left believe, but rather by stressing the strengths of Bush's first four years: The Decider. He makes decisions and sticks to them - and you know what you're getting (we've said it over and over again, but just because one makes a decision and sticks to it does not make it the right thing to do, let alone the right decision. It's also not a great characteristic, flexibility is a much better characteristic).

What Rove was, after all, was a realist. Unlike so many in DC, Rove had a solid pulse of what the country actually felt and desired. He didn't concern himself with Hill gossip or FOXNews (which I'm sure Rove would even admit has little to no effect on the country's political outlook and beliefs) - rather he understood that what people in the US don't like about Washington, is Washington itself. This is lost on anyone who has lived in DC for two years or more. If New Yorkers are arrogant, then DCers are ignorant.

Rove, or at least his legacy, was once again lucky in that less than six months after the 2004 election, Bush reached his tipping point. Only months into his second term, the nation turned on the war, the White House, and Bush was fast becoming a lame duck - in fact Bush was probably a lame duck before the 2006 midterm elections - and achievement in its own right. Rove over played his hand after the 2004 election. By all accounts, he has had little to no say on foreign policy (and we would venture to guess he was against the War in Iraq), but in domestic policy Rove has been a failure. Bush's second term is, after two and a half years, littered with failure. In fact, one would be hard pressed to find a positive to come from the second term thus far. From Social Security reform to Harriet Miers and Valerie Plume to the Justice Department, Bush's second term has a 'turn your eyes from the wreck' type feel.

As every paper and quasi-intellectual chip in their two cents on Rove's departure, something like this always seems to come up:
He [Rove] liked to recall Mark Hanna, the political operative behind the rise of President William McKinley a century earlier, who not only helped his boss win the presidency but launched a period of Republican dominance -- the sort of era Rove wanted to usher in himself.

As Rove leaves after six years as the president's closest aide, the biggest question hovering over him may be why this great crusade failed, why the Republican version of a New Deal era seems as elusive as ever.

One has to wonder what Rove was thinking with the Republican New Deal type dreams. The GOP tent has been, at least in the last 80 to 90 years, a small tent. It has never really tried to be an all encompassing and welcoming party, like the Democrats. This has been a positive for the party for the most part. Sure when things go bad, they go really bad for the GOP. But the small, tight-nit GOP of our fathers has been a fairly successful formula. By attempting to 'open' it up to everyone seemed problematic since all it was going to do, eventually, was piss off the base. And that base? The Rockefeller Republicans - wealthy, white males, who desired smaller government, with a slice of libertarian mores. Rove wanted to change this, not with "compassionate conservatives" but to some sort of hybrid Democrats with socially conservative morals. But the social conservatives pissed off Northeast GOPers to the point where the Republican party looks as if it may need to be rebuilt in the Northeast (and scandal has nearly destroyed it in the Midwest from Illinois to Ohio). Immigration reform pissed off the 'newer' social conservatives. Social security reform pissed off everyone. Where have you gone, fiscal conservative Republican? Because right now, the difference between the Democrats and "Bush" Republicans isn't your classical ideological government debate. This isn't Reagan vs. Tip O'Neil or Goldwater against LBJ's Great Society. Today's 'fight' has more to do with some sort of moral correctness - who is more right in their ideas, not actions or policies.

For such a student of history, how and why did Rove seemly forget his history of the Republican party? The New Yorker had this to say:

Rove never pushed for a policy unless he saw a group of big funders or a significant electoral constituency which it might bring to the Republican Party. Social Security privatization was supposed to attract middle-class people whose pensions had been invested in the stock market; immigration reform to attract Latinos and small-business owners; the No Child Left Behind law public-school parents; and so on. Conversely, Rove was always looking for neglected constituencies—the most important by far being frequent churchgoers—and trying to figure out what mix of government goodies and organizing techniques would bring them into the Republican fold. (He was never a real conservative, except in the liberal-hating sense, because the idea that everybody who participates in politics expects something from government was at the heart of his thinking.)

But I think the preceding paragraph probably sums up Rove best:
Whatever Rove really thinks about McKinley, it’s fair to say that his vision of the good in politics (and maybe Bush’s, too) is rooted in the late nineteenth century, when parties and bosses were at their most powerful, when the federal government was run on patronage, and when the distinction between “politics” and “policy,” and the idea that “partisanship” is bad, hadn’t occurred to anyone but a few patrician reformers. If Ronald Reagan was trying to abolish Lyndon Johnson’s Great Society, Rove and Bush were trying to abolish the Progressive Era, which, in their view, had given liberal “élites”—judges, journalists, policy analysts, bureaucrats—an electorally unearned thumb on the scales of government.

It's an interesting thought and probably one that isn't too far off. No matter how you voted or what you think of Bush (then or now) there always was an agenda, to undo something and create something new or at least felt new. And as I said, Rove was attempting to enlarge the Republican tent, but the result, partly thanks to Iraq, is a party who lacks a true vision and goal.

And that's scary since now we have TWO parties who have no idea what they want to do or how to lead this country.

Worst Blogger Award

2007-08-21T21:38:00.000-05:00

No excuses, we just haven't been blogging. Summer does that to us. People love it... we like it. The humidly and sweating aren't high on our list of things we enjoy. Not saying that we want winter, because come March in Chicago, winter stinks. But summer? Overrated. Who ever said you can't go outside in February anyway? The world after a fresh snow beats the crap out of the beach. Pardon our Midwestern roots... Give us fall. Playoff baseball. Fantasy Football. The SexCannon. College Football. The new TV season. Interesting films instead of crap Wantabe Star War summer movies (though, Borne rocks). Fall is so underrated. He look, a Page 2 column waiting to be written! Someone call Jim Capel!

- Our national sports nightmare is coming to an end. How did we ever survive Bonds breaking the record? Vick and his mess? The NBA being fixed? But you know what, I still don't miss T.O.

- It's a shame I can't get extra credit for watching the White Sox and the Royals. It's a shame I don't get some sort of award/enjoyment out of watching the 2007 White Sox. I could bitch and moan about them, but I do it with my dad and in my head so often, that I don't want to upset myself. But Jerry Owens - you and Darin Erstad need to get out of my life.

- There's bad luck. Then there is the 2007 Phillies.

- Is it me or has this summer lacked a pop song or two? I mean, I heard that suicide song, and it stinks, I mean it isn't even so bad it's good. Bummer of a summer when it comes to the music.

- Blah Rove. Blah DC. Blah all that at the moment. Summer is never good for politics.

- Oh, and something needs to be done about international basketball. Seriously. It's a disgrace.

- Maybe All I Need Is a Shot in the Arm. We're gonna try to get back in a groove. I know we can do it!

Vick Would Have Been Better Off...

2007-07-31T23:52:00.000-05:00

Lester Munson nicely summed up what I’ve been feeling and attempting to get across over the past few days. He was on WSCR on Saturday around 2:00pm central and said something along the lines of this:
Mike Vick would have been better off beating his girlfriend, in front of the Georgia Dome, fifteen minutes before kickoff.

It’s a sad state of affairs if that is the case in this country. It takes a sick man to do what Vick did to those dogs. But where are the protesters whenever Jason Kidd takes the court? Or Brett Myers takes the mound? Or when ever Leonard Little steps onto the football field?

Just look at how we view Pacman Jones and Vick differently during their legal issues. Vick is the second coming of the Devil. Pacman borders on being a ‘thug’, jerk, and joke. Pacman (or his people) nearly killed a man.

While I can’t justify either Vick or Pacman’s actions; in my eyes I have no sympathy for Pacman (or Myers or Kidd or Little for that matter). Those would be the ones who I would protest. They are the ones who upset me.

Vick:Dogs::Favre:Deer

2007-07-27T16:31:00.001-05:00

Dear Blogs,

Excuse me while I dig up some information about Brett Favre, everyone’s favorite quarterback, hunting deer. Maybe I can find a picture. Here are a few quotes. How nice. Brett Favre is a big fan of killing deer:

PK: What are you hunting?

Favre: Deer.

Meanwhile, Mike Vick is getting raked over the coals for training dogs how to fight and killing dogs.

Killing dogs isn’t cool, don’t get us wrong. But killing deer doesn’t seem very cool either. Anyone honestly believe that Favre brings the deer back and use all of the deer for daily household needs?

We also fully understand that killing dogs is against the law. And for that Vick should be prosecuted. No argument there.

But how about you bloggers get off your ‘holier than-thou’ horse and think long and hard about those hunting laws. Think about how minks are raised in small, cages for the single purpose of making fur coats. Think about that hamburger, hot dog, steak, chicken, or ham sandwich next time it enters your mouth. Think about that veal that you had (or have always wanted to have) and how that’s raised.

We’re no PETA members. We enjoy our hamburgers and hot dogs. And we understand the difference between a deer and a dog (a domesticated animal). But we also realize that reason why bloggers are going off on Vick is because like many people, they are probably dog owners. And they love their dogs. And to see someone treat dogs that way is a cold, harsh reflection on something happening to their dog. How could someone treat dogs as if they were ants or spider?

Mike Vick may have killed dogs. That’s not cool. But athletes who harm other humans? We detest them much more than Michael Vick.

But where were you when Brett Meyers beat his wife last year? And have you blogged against Leonard Little, let alone cheer for him, after he killed someone because he was driving drunk? If anyone should be kicked out of the NFL, it's Little. And least us forget Pacman Jones, who appears to have a connection to a shooting which left a man paralyzed. Yet the blogging world treats Pacman as as if he's the punchline.

All these crimes, in our eyes, are much more damning and actually deserve our detest. No hurting dogs isn't cool. But harming, or killing, humans is much, much worse.

If Vick had been involved in cockfights, would anyone care? I mean, that's illegal too.

As for Favre, he's just an example. And he didn't break the law, which Vick may have done. No, we don't think less of Favre because he likes to shoot deer. We don't think it's cool, but let's all realize that if we're going to go all nuts about athletes killing animals, where is the Favre outrage?

Because Sometimes Life Isn't Made To Order...

2007-07-20T15:04:00.000-05:00

A few months ago, That's On Point pointed out the trailer for "Because I Said So" a chick-flick that promised not only to be cliche, but also so brutal, in a weird way we sort of wanted to see it for the unintentional comedy factor.

In fact, we almost did... after finals second quarter, we were oh so close to going to see this flick with two or three drunk peers. We wanted to enjoy the brutality. But another round of drinks at Jimmy's got in the way.

But we still have hope. Move over Because I Said So, there is a new brutal chick flick in town. Because sometimes life isn't made to order:

The Wire Is Robbed

2007-07-19T13:28:00.000-05:00

We have hinted here and other places that The Wire is the greatest show on TV and in TV history. True, we haven't seen every show ever made, but we'd put it up against anything and everything ever produced.

So when we saw that it wasn't nominated for any Emmy's, again, today we weren't all that surprised. I just assumed that the Emmy committee decided not to allow The Wire in the competition because they would win everything. Best song, best show, best acting, best writing, best everything... the show is simply amazing. So, we figure that the Emmy's will be shown this year with a banner on the bottom of your TV saying something like "The Emmy committee decided that The Wire was not eligible for this year awards because it is simply too good to compare to anything else on TV over the last year. Therefore the awards you see being awarded are for second best. Thanks for watching."

I mean the only reason The Wire wasn't nominated for anything was because it would win everything right? That's the only possible explanation.

Over the last three seasons we have watched a decent amount TV - and nothing, I mean nothing, comes close to The Wire. And weren't not here saying that other shows aren't good. Lost is good to great. Seasons 4 and 5 of 24 were good. The Gilmore Girls featured some of the best writing and acting on TV (not so much this year). By all accounts Friday Night Lights and Heroes are very good. And least I forget The Sopranos, probably the greatest drama on TV that most people have seen.

But The Wire blows all these shows out of the water. Maybe it's too smart. Maybe it is too gritty, too realistic. Maybe it focuses on those areas of urban life that we all pretend don't exist. Maybe it has too many lairs. Maybe the characters are too flawed and too interesting. Maybe the show is too deep. Maybe it is forgotten because it doesn't take place in New York City or a cute or down-to-Earth rural town. Maybe it is just too good. [I would hate to think that it's too black, but it's wroth bringing up.]

I honestly don't get it. It's a shame. The best show on TV, a show that will literally forget that the rest of the world exists, is forgotten by the so called critics.

I guess the Emmy's are turning into the Grammy's. That's too bad.

What a joke - Boston Legal and Grey's Anatomy got nominations for best drama. We're not fans of either and find it hard to see the 'greatness' of those two shows. While Lost had one of the most uneven seasons for a TV show, well ever, it should have received a nod over one of those two (The Wire being the other if you couldn't guess). Many critics think that Friday Night Lights was robbed, we just haven't seen it to say.

But as far as Lost goes... it wasn't as good as it's first season. And let's not forget that despite its strong finish, the first half of the season was pretty weak. Lost did get a nom for writing... so I don't feel half as bad for it as, say, The Wire.

I can't see how Two and a half Men or Entourage are better than My Name is Earl, but apparently they are. And I should say, Earl isn't even that 'great' of a show. But it's enjoyable, makes us laugh, and worthy of leading off on Thursday nights. And can everyone end their crush on Entourage? It isn't that good of a show and most episodes lack any sort of meaningful conflict. It isn't all that funny. The acting is sub-par - Jeremy Piven is good because everyone else isn't so good. He's like a AAAA ballplayer playing rookie ball on that show. And finally it pretty much perfectly sums up everything that is wrong with this country right now: rich white people can have fun, sex, do drugs, drink too much, take on little to no responsibility, and not have pay the consequences of their actions. There is a reason why frat boys love the show - because it's their life. So why do we glorify this culture and life - which appears to be so empty and shallow once you start to analyze it?

Random Thoughts

2007-07-18T14:26:00.000-05:00

So let me get this right. It's okay for NFL players to shoot deer. But it's not okay for NFL players to fight dogs. Okay, I understand, training dogs to fight isn't cool. But shooting deer isn't cool either. I guess my problem is that this all seems a little ridiculous. It's dog fighting. Yes it's not a good thing, but a slap on the wrist would have been more than enough in our fair opinion. If Vick had shoot the dog with a gun, he wouldn't be in trouble right now correct?

But I think what's even more hypocritical of this entire Vick mess is that Vick didn't harm any human beings. While we don't want to get in a pissing contest of what is worse, we think it is important to point out that Vick didn't harm any humans by training dogs to fight. In our eyes, athletes who drive drunk, are charged with domestic abuse, any sort of sexual abuse, or physical abuse are the bigger 'villains'. These athletes put other human beings in harms way - directly or indirectly - and that's a much greater threat to society. Yes, we can all agree, training dogs to fight isn't cool. But driving while drunk, for example, can lead to much graver and tragic consequences.

Speaking of guns, a fantastic idea from Jason Roeder over at McSweeney's: Iraqi Free Gun.

"I suppose some of the weapons we provide could be used against us. But we all know that guns don't kill people, people kill people. All a semiautomatic does is discharge 75 poor choices per minute. Remember that so-called assault-weapons ban we had? What happened there? Thugs merely adapted and replaced drive-by shootings with drive-by pillow smotherings, and no one was any safer."

The fact that we can name 10 NASCAR drivers makes us want to puke all over those big dishes at ESPN.

Don't look now, but Goldman Sachs is saying that oil could hit $95 a barrel this year. That's like $4 or more at the pump. This would be very bad for many reasons; pretty much no matter what, commodity prices will rise, which means you'll be spending more at the pump and the grocery store (and the inefficient but politically popular corn ethanol becomes even more popular; raising prices even further). Maybe most important is the impacts to inflation - which is probably higher than anyone at the Fed would like and probably will go higher if oil prices continue to rise. As inflation rises, the Fed may have to hike up interest rates, if they do so, the economy, which is already some what delicate and iffy, will slow down. The other shitty thing about inflation is that with real wages stuck in neutral, most Americans will feel it in their pocket books. Seeing that spending by your every day American has kept the economy moving during the last five years, consumer spending really can't decrease.

And for those who say the economy is doing well... look a little deeper. Yes, unemployment is low. But interest rates could go up. Inflation looks like it will continue to be a bit of a worry. Real wages are stuck in neutral. The sub-prime mortgage crisis is hurting a lot of Americans. And we have a negative savings rate two years running. The negative savings rate is really scary because long term, this will be a problem. As people spend more than they earn, it is giving the economy a false 'perception'. At some point people are going to have to stop spending so much. The US economy isn't as 'hot' as some like to point out. No, this isn't Japan and there is no need to panic. Yet, let's not all start patting each other on the back and saying everything alright. Changes are needed in various areas. (And we freely admit that there have been very few times in history when one hasn't needed to worry somewhat about the economy. But this isn't the late 1990s. Corporations are getting richer while most people are left behind. In the 90s, both corporations and your average Joe was doing better).

Let me make sure I've got this right too: Part of the reason we invaded Iraq was to fight the terrorists there instead of here. But now the National Intelligence Agency is telling me that there's a good chance the terrorists will strike the USA. So it appears to us here at VFLOAB that fighting the terrorists on their turf has back fired. And if that's gone wrong too, has ANYTHING gone right in Iraq? As the NIA reports concludes that al-Qaeda "has protected or regenerated key elements of its Homeland attack capability" by creating a safe-haven in Pakistan. So while we toil in Iraq with over 120,000 troops; under 20,000 troops are in Afghanistan and near the Pakistan border fighting al-Qaeda. The very same al-Qaeda who were the enemy all along. Great job, George and Dick! (It being Wednesday, the sarcasm is free).

Soccer Just Might Make It Here...

2007-07-18T09:10:00.000-05:00

Last Wednesday, on the day that David Beckham in an LA Galaxy kit appeared on the cover of the leading sports weekly in the United States (Sports Illustrated for those reading in Bristol, CT) a funny thing happened.

DC United lost to the Harrisburg City Islanders 1-0 in the US Open Cup.

Who are the Harrisburg City Islanders?

Beats me. But according to the Washington Post they are "a team on the third tier of the U.S. pro system" playing in the "the gentle hills of Amish country."

Is this the biggest upset in US soccer history? Depending on where you stand on the US upset of England in the 1950 World Cup it probably is, though I'm not well versed in the steep history of the US Open Cup. Think of it this way - imagine if a D-III school like the University of Chicago or the Catholic University of America defeated USC in football. Think Hoosiers. Think Mystery, Alaska. Think of something totally insane like that. Think something America can get behind.

Sure the US Open Cup isn't the FA Cup. But it's upsets like this that make (made) the FA Cup one of the, if not the most, important trophies in sports. It's upsets that make the NCAA tournament so great (remember nothing gets people bitching like the lack of upsets on the first few days of the tourney). Sports fans live for upsets. We live to root for the underdog. Those moments come along only a few times every few years, and when they do we can't wait to make a movie about it (see: State, Boise).

We are a country that loves the underdog (save foreign policy). After all part of the mystique (good and bad) of the American Dream is the underdog raising his/herself by ones own bootstraps, by beating the odds and building that house with a white picket fence and walk in closet.

And for a night somewhere in Pennsylvania, that happened. The underdog won. An upset occurred.

But at the same time here in lies the problem - the upset already happened. The game wasn't on national TV, so a nation didn't tune in to see a scrappy bunch of guys from the Harrisburg City Islanders defeat the mighty DC United. And if you're the MLS how do you promote something like this? A catch-22 eh, because the four morons on Around the Horn will bash the 'quality' of US club soccer. "IF A BUNCH OF SCRUBS FROM THE MIDDLE OF NO WHERE CAN BEAT AN mls TEAM, WHY WOULD I EVER WANT TO WATCH SUCH A PRODUCT?" - Big Ugly Head. "I couldn't agree more, Big Ugly Head! If that's how bad the 'professionals' are in America, I'm not going to tune in!" - Small Ugly Head... anyway you get the idea. The media will miss the point in all this.

Which is all a shame, because I'm sure this would have been a thrilling match to watch on TV. Early in the second half, Harrisburg City scored - imagine watching the next 40 minutes, with all the tension and delight that only a potential upset can bring. Could the Islanders hold off United?

For all the awareness David Beckham is going to bring to the MLS and soccer, the question remains how many people will actually become fans. Some will, there is no doubt about that, and the soccer community and support will continue to grow here in this country. But a match like last Wednesday night would probably have turned more people on to the game than David Beckham.

Pitchfork

2007-07-16T12:18:00.000-05:00

We attended the Pitchfork Music Festival this weekend. Let's just say it was an uneven weekend. The two main stages were set up well and you could pretty much hear everything that was going on at those stages. But let's totally rip the second stage, the "B" or Balance Stage which had shitty sound and was nearly impossible to see or move around. The area around the stage was far too narrow making it uncomfortable - basically the Balance Stage was a cage. The front and two sides were caged in by fence and forced anyone who wanted to see an act on the stage to act more like cattle than human beings. On top of that, if you weren't within 40 feet of the stage, it was nearly impossible to hear anything. The sound system was worse than your run of the mill high school. The Balance Stage was the biggest disappointment of a longer than should be list of disappointments.

Saturday:

We'll admit it, we didn't get there until around 6pm... but apparently we didn't miss much. As one person we talked to said, "If you ever want to kill a festival, have Iron and Wine play." Over all, we thought the line up on Saturday was pretty week, and we weren't far off with that thinking. While it would have been nice to see Califone or Voxtrot we weren't able to, therefore that left Oxford Collapse and Dan Deacon as the two acts that we wanted to see on Saturday. Overall, let's just say Saturday sucked.

Mastodom - We arrived as they hit the stage having never heard anything by these guys. Seeing that metal isn't our bag, we didn't listen too closely. They sounded fine... I guess.

Oxford Collapse - Seeing that they were at the "B" stage, they were doomed from the get go. Over the last year, they have risen up to become of one my favorite current bands and "The Boys Go Home" is one of my favorite songs. As a live band they didn't seem to have the explosiveness that I was expecting them to have. While the packed some punch, they didn't hit hard. Part of this was probably because the background vocals were louder than the lead vocals (nice job sound guys!) and the lead guitar was uneven in sound... sometimes loud, sometimes not easily audible. In my opinion, I would rather them have taken the main stage than pretty much anyone else who played on Saturday. And if I really wanted to see them preform, I should have gone to the Hideout that night. Let's just say this: IT IS NEVER A GOOD SIGN FOR A FESTIVAL WHEN ONE IS SAYING TO ONESELF... MAN I SHOULD DITCH THIS AND SEE THIS BAND AT THE HIDEOUT. That is how shitty Saturday was.

Clipse - While adding some much needed energy to a fairly subdued and at times lame crowd of hipsters, I didn't think they were anything all that special in the 15 minutes I stuck around to hear them. They weren't bad and did seem like fun for the first ten minutes. But by no means did they suck me in.

Dan Deacon - I downloaded a few Deacon tracks a few months ago and fell in love with them. So I was pumped to go see him. One problem, actually two, I could not hear or see Dan Deacon because the Balance Stage sucked. A shame because he seemed like he could totally have taken over the festival if he had been given the main stage.

Cat Power - We were tired by this point and the idea of getting a case and a few burgers sounded a whole lot cooler than seeing if Cat Power would break down on stage. And no one, I repeat no one, wanted to see Yoko.

Sunday

Sea and Cake - While it would have been cool to see The Ponys, we didn't feel like getting there at 1:30. Therefore we arrived to see Sea & Cake at 4pm. Without too much effort, they became better than any band that we saw/heard on Saturday. While they at times got a little too sleepy, they picked it up and threw in enough poppy tunes to not only hold my attention, but to be sure to check them out another time.

Jamie Liddell - The most uneven performance that we saw, Liddell rocked at times and lost me at others. Wearing what appeared to be a headpiece that George Clinton had given him, Liddell nailed every 70s inspired soul song that he did. But when he went behind his tables and did some more experimental stuff, he lost the crowd at the same time. The looping was aiight but he is no Andrew Bird. No matter, one of the better acts of the weekend.

Stephen Malkmus - While we loved the fact that he played "Spit on a Stranger" he was underwhelming, lacked presence, and Malkmus needed a band behind him. A man and his guitar can be lovely... but not at an outdoor festival with 17,000 people. I won't call him a disappointment, but he would have been a lot better if he had some supporting musicians with him.

Of Montreal - Easily the weirdest group of the day, they came on stage wearing bizarre outfits. While people seemed excited to see them, I wasn't too impressed. A few songs lagged on for too long and didn't really go any where. The guy in wearing a lobster arm and another guy dressed as a tree stump on stage were not only weird, but actually took away from everything... what was their point? Or better yet, why should I care?

The New Pornographers - No Neko Case... a disappointment. But the band still delivered in what was probably my favorite act. They were fun, interesting, and solid. They came out and just played music - no side shows or over the top costumes.

The Bad:

- The Balance Stage - I can't tell you how much it sucked.

- Saturday's Line up - Yoko? Seriously? I'm sure I'm not being open minded enough, but it's sort of like inviting Christopher Hitches to be the key speaker at a Liberal Conference in Madison at this point. Let's just say the guys at Pitchfork are trying too hard.

- The Crowd - Hipsters aren't the loudest bunch. They don't have problems with consumerism or commercialism so you won't get cries for revolution or change. It's a crowd were image matters more than thirst. And when it comes to musical festivals, they aren't the best crowd to see shows with. They lack energy and passion, which hurt some acts. Dancing was kept to the minimum (as was any sort of sign of one showing that he/she may actually like the band that was preforming).

- Wannabe Hipsters - Where does one draw the line between irony and stupidity? And if there is still such a line, I feel as if we've passed it. Those who are hip don't try to be hip (if that makes any sense). There were far too many wannabe hipsters and people trying too hard to be hip. Too many people were trying to be cool, thus they ended up being lamer than most frat boys on Clark or Lincoln Ave. Note to male hipster wannabes: do no wear short shorts. These are not hip. Just because it happened in the 80s doesn't make it cool now.

The Good:

- $1 water and drinking fountains were great.

- The food was surprisingly good.

- $4 Goose Island and short lines for the beer... not bad at all considering I'd pay that or more at pretty much any bar in Chicago for a 312 or Honkers Ale.

- Sunday's line up

- When ever Jamie Lidell was singing soul.

- Sea and Cake's more pop inspired stuff.

- The New Pornographers

- Union Park

- The fact that the festival wasn't over crowded. In fact, I could see them expanding the number of people by a few thousand next year (provided they created a bit more space). But thankfully, one could move and breath easily.

- The Event Promoters, Staffers, and Planners... fantastic job by all them. The festival was the perfect size, it was comfortable, and the price was just right. Even though I didn't have a good time on Saturday, the price didn't make me feel ripped off (or angry). And Sunday was a nice time.

GRADE: B

If the "B" Stage was even remotely better, this would have been a higher grade. Saturday's line up didn't really catch my eye, but part of that was because I couldn't get there until 6pm (I think Voxtrot and Battles would have been cool). The price was A+, Sunday was a solid A-/B+, and the main stages were done right; good sound and nice sightlines from pretty much anywhere. Just do something about that second stage and remember to ditch those bands that sound great in small venues.

As Jim DeRogotis correctly points out: "In the end, with the third Pitchfork fest standing as an unqualified artistic success as well as a profitable business venture (according to the promoters, who declined to say exactly how much money they made), the question it raised was not how it could offer so much for so little ($50 for a three-day pass), but how larger, much better-funded and more heavily hyped fests -- chief among them the reinvented Lollapalooza -- can justify charging so much while delivering far inferior sound and sight lines, milking concertgoers with overpriced amenities and assaulting them with corporate promotional hucksterism at the expense of what mattered most in Union Park: the music."

Thoughts on Syriana

2007-07-13T16:16:00.000-05:00

We recently watched Syriana, a good but very confusing film, but we were able to take a few ideas away from the movie.

One of the problems in the Middle East and Islam isn't only religion in itself, it's the lack of economic opportunity for the people in many Middle Eastern nations. Seeing the billions/trillions of dollars that can be made in oil, many leaders years ago sold their people down the river in the name of oil. This is probably why in places like Jordan and Israel religious extremism isn't as 'ripe'. These countries have been forced to create a more diverse economy (with a degree of success). Meanwhile, in places like Iran and Saudi Arabia, oil so dominates and these economies that there is little investment into other sectors or areas of the economy. There are only so many jobs that oil can provide and on top of that many of them are occupied by foreigners. The lack of other industries and options leads to many to extremism - in this case religious fanaticism. Just take a look at those who were part of the 9/11 plot - most of them were Saudi Arabian (as is bin Laden) and the remaining few were from the UAE. This isn't a coincidence. The best policy the US could take in the Middle East is to invest in developing dynamic and diverse economies that aren't completely based upon oil.

Also it's easy to see the parallel to this in Africa were we, the West, exploits the natural resources (diamonds, gold, oil, etc) creating economies of havenots. In Africa this has lead to far too many civil wars.

The CIA and the US government will do whatever they can to put the governments that are most friendly to the US in place. I think this comes as no surprise. How successful this policy has been can be debated... it's mos def more gray than black and white. There are pros and cons to such policy.

Big Oil controls this country, they may not run it directly, but they have a lot of people's ear and the corruption is ripe. There is a reason why Big Oil always seems to get the biggest and best tax breaks.

The ESPY Award They Should Be Giving Out...

2007-07-12T08:48:00.000-05:00

It's our first ever mailbag! We received an e-mail from the Polish Jesus and figure, if the Jesuit educated males of the East Coast can do it... what's to stop us hard working, Jesuit educated Midwesterns from having Mailbags? Away we go:

I think you/we should create an ESPY Award for "Hippest Sports Phrase of the Year" Potential nominees:

- "I did not watch a minute of the NBA Finals!" (this, to me, should be the overwhelming favorite)
- "The Yankees are the best team money can buy" (grandfather clause here, as it is a 6-time champion)
- "Was there an all-star game last night?" (Could refer to NBA or MLB)
- "They still play hockey???"
- "I don't watch Sportscenter anymore!" (no offense, but WIP makes this point quite a bit)
- "I'm a big [NFL team] fan" (generally stated by a female)

Mike from Bryn Mawr

I'll add a few more:
- "He just loves to play football." (This is rarely said by fans, but I'm not sure announcers can go more than five plays without saying it during a Packers game).
- "The Spurs are just so boring."
- "Simmons isn't as good as he used to be." (Anyone else notice that he's been pretty fantastic the last four or five months?)
- "Woody Page is an idiot" or "I can't stand Around the Horn" (Look people, if you don't like it, don't watch it).

Chicago Specific Nominees:
- "If they trade Buehrle I'm never going to see the White Sox play ever again." (White Sox fans: More fickel than a female with no self-confidence! Seriously, who were these people? Why are they Sox fans? Why can't they go away?)
- "Rex is our quarterback." (To really appreciate this one, you have to hear it about 100 times to really get the full effect of Lovie's drawl).
- "The Cubs have the best starting rotation in the majors." (Don't get me started on the Cubs and Cub fans...)
- "Put in Griese!" (Every Bear fan that started watching in Week 10 or later).
- "I don't see how this makes the Bulls better" or "I just don't like Noah." (A favorite of the morons on the WSCR, 670AM, the Score. To hear them say it, the Bulls should have traded the #9 for Kobe and Garnett).

And while we're at it... why not introduce a Hall'o'Fame of Hip Sports Phrases:
- "I haven't gone to a baseball game since the Strike."
- "Cal Ripken saved baseball."
- "I don't watch the NBA because it's just a bunch of thugs."

If you want to see Sicko for free, you can do so here:
http://insanefilms.com/?p=413
It's about as balanced as Soviet propaganda, but it is pretty interesting.

For Soviet propaganda, peep dis:
http://www.englishrussia.com/?p=312
For some reason I LOVE propaganda.

Matt (Chicago)

Umm, okay Matt. I do like how the Soviets couldn't find a qualified 10 year old to draw half of those posters.

If Mexico is 2-0 in Copa America shouldn't the US be 13 and -2 after two games?
- Rodrigo (Mexico)

Uncle, Rodrigo. Uncle.

Look we sent a shitty team to Copa America. Our goalie is older than Father Time, our back line features one starter, our midfield features only two guys with long term futures with the national team, and we still don't have a striker (mainly because Vick, Iverson, and Reggie Bush don't play soccer). I know, excuses are like assholes, but 'dem the facts.

No matter, you guys haven't won in the US since Clinton and Zedillo were presidents. I'd call that one sided. If it wasn't for the Azteca, this may be a Red Sox/Yankees type situation.

I am sort of disappointed in the US Soccer Federation, their goal this summer was to win the Gold Cup. They could careless about Copa America, probably because they know we can't win it. But if we're ever going to reach that point where we face off with Brazil in every World Cup Final, we should place more empathises on competitions where there is more than one quality team. But that would be too risky. Not like it matters, I'm sure Landon will disappear for about a year or so since he's actually been worth a damn over the past few months. No one dominates El Salvador and Honduras like Landon Donovan. No one disappears faster than Landon Donovan come time to play a team with actual quality. I hope he has fun cutting Beckham's hair this summer.

Apparently I'm being dragged there tonight. So if anyone's
interested, that's where I'll be (drunk, as usual)
-Ben (Chicago)

Yup, these are my friends.

2007-07-11T09:30:00.000-05:00

The iPhone came out about 10 days ago to rave reviews. People stood in line over night to get their hands on the phone, a phone!, which was going to revolutionize the industry. From the sound of it, not only does this phone rock, it can, as Jewel said, save your soul. Something like that.

We got our hands on the iPhone a few days ago. And it is cool. There is no doubt about that. The screen is pretty awesome. The graphics are nice. It's a bit smaller than a 'normal' iPod. But we couldn't help but notice one thing.

It's a phone.

Strange but true, it's only a phone. It does everything you'd expect a phone to do. But the difference is it looks really effing cool in the process. We do have some concerns about the potential durability of the iPhone since the iPod isn't the most sturdy thing ever made... will everyone have to get big old ugly cases for the iPhone to ensure that the screen doesn't crack? And if you drop it, will it break into a thousand pieces, because it looks like it will? Cell phones are dropped all the time, but they're tough (for the most part). They can handle the drops. But can an iPhone? It sure doesn't look that way.

The one feature that the iPhone has that most other phones do not is that it uses an actual, easy to use, full web browser. This alone makes the phone awesome.

But there's one problem... the AT&T network stinks. And because of that, we couldn't even load the web page that we requested.

So, we have this to ask... why spend 500 bucks on a phone that looks cool? I know this is a silly question since we live in a society/culture that spends hundreds of dollars on jeans and plastic surgery is not only common but accepted. Therefore, the idea of people spending Five-Hundred dollars on a phone isn't quite insane. But until the iPhone has a quick and actually working Internet connection, we say save your money. Invest that money, wait a year, and then buy the iPhone. By them I'm sure either AT&T will have a better network and/or the iPhone will be carried by another network. Because without a solid, consistent, good Internet connection you're spending 10 times what you need to on a phone. Unless you're shallow, hold out for a while.

The iPhone is the future, there's no doubt about that... but the future can wait a year or two.

2007-07-10T12:47:00.000-05:00

A very good piece by EJ Dionne today in the Post. And not just because he's right, but because the GOP should take what he's said to heart.

Back in 2002 and 2003 and even 2004 when W was about as popular as a President can be, the GOP apparently thought that they would forever be the most popular and only party in America. They were the New Party of the 21st Century. The Democrats were also rans, out of ideas and politically a mess. They were somewhat right about the Democrats, they were (and maybe still are) out of ideas and they were a political mess.

But the GOP were way off on their own position in American politics. It was almost as if they totally forgot they barely won the 2000 election (and in fact, Bush lost the popular vote). They didn't have a mandate like the Democrats did in 1932 or Labour did in 1997 or that they even had in 1994 in Congress. They were a party that won by the skin of their teeth (or better yet, because of the voting system in this country).

When they were going around in 2002 and 2003 as if they were the Forever Party, it didn't make sense. Bush, who came to power as a 'compassionate conservative' was anything but during this time. He surrounded himself with political hacks and talked up partisan politics - all this during a time of change, concern, and uncertainty in the US as we felt our way though the effects of 9/11. He built a huge house of cards, and looked as if and believed that he was The Man and no one was ever going to touch him until he had to step down in 2008.

Of course that house of cards fell and Bush is probably looking at approval ratings of 35% until he leaves office... I wouldn't be surprised if he was the first President not to get a boost in his ratings when he's about to leave. I'm getting ahead of myself, because that's still 18 months away.

Bush will be president until Jan. 20, 2009. Are we doomed to 18 months of drift? Instead of sounding like a Republican political consultant, Bush might try to sound like a president who understands that power in Washington -- and opinion in the country -- shifted after the 2006 elections.

That, my friends, is a long ass time. And going by the last six months, Bush seems some what contempt to just ride out these 18th months. Besides the 'Surge' and his failed, somewhat half ass, attempt to get the immigration bill though Congress (which showed how weak he is), Bush hasn't done much over the last few months besides talk about what he always talks about... nonsense and no one is buying it anymore.

Bush and company would be smart to take some of Dionne and Sarkozy's advise. No, he doesn't have to make peace with Al Gore or any other Democrat - American politics doesn't work that way. But he could try to work with the Democrats and attempt to do something; it might just boost his image and help his, what appears to be already tarnished, legacy. Because after all, 18 months is a decent amount of time to waste.